Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #11  February 4,2012, 5:45am
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Coming on too strong can backfire and be considered "creepy" if you are not reading things correctly.

You are getting first dates....so it's something happening in person on the date.

Are you suggesting cheap coffee meet-ups...and haggling over the check?

Are you showing up well groomed, showered ,etc. or hectic and messy from work /gym etc?

Make sure you have good dental /oral hygiene...and don't reek of garlic, onions, bad breath etc.

Since all five recoiled from your "coming onto them"...stop doing that....and check your personal grooming.....Good Luck...
seekingdatingadvice wrote :
I am seeking advice on getting past the first date.

Five of the last six women I have dated haven't worked out.

I've tried to come onto women more, like holding hands and kissing, but I think that turns them off during a first date. All five women wouldn't kiss me at the end of the date.
 
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myusernamehere is online now myusernamehere Post #12  February 4,2012, 8:32am
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StingFanChicago wrote :
Last but not least, if a guy doesn't pay on the first date, that is a big turn off. And we're just talking about a quick coffee date or drinks (and I rarely have more than one drink, two at most.) So if a guy is too cheap and not chivilrous enough to at least pay for that, I'm not thinking he knows how to treat a woman. I don't care if people think this is too old fashioned.
Do you know how expensive that is? Since it's been established earlier in the thread that a man will need to go on many first dates before he's able to get a second, he could end up wasting hundreds of dollars. The first date should be split 50/50 so that both sides have an equal investment. Real men don't buy dinner for women they haven't already slept with.
 
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boomer_gal is online now boomer_gal Post #13  February 4,2012, 9:54am
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myusernamehere wrote :
Do you know how expensive that is? Since it's been established earlier in the thread that a man will need to go on many first dates before he's able to get a second, he could end up wasting hundreds of dollars. The first date should be split 50/50 so that both sides have an equal investment. Real men don't buy dinner for women they haven't already slept with.
You have stated here on more than one occasion that you are not having great success w/ dating. Perhaps this dating strategy is not a wise one. Just sayin...
 
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OlderButWiser0549 is online now OlderButWiser0549 Post #14  February 4,2012, 10:39am
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myusernamehere wrote :
Real men don't buy dinner for women they haven't already slept with.
Sometimes your wisdom just leaves me speechless.
 
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myusernamehere is online now myusernamehere Post #15  February 4,2012, 2:59pm
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boomer_gal wrote :
You have stated here on more than one occasion that you are not having great success w/ dating. Perhaps this dating strategy is not a wise one. Just sayin...
Perhaps. But with my aspergers, I doubt I'd be successful regardless of what I did.

Cheers
 
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EccentricAmbiguity is offline EccentricAmbiguity Post #16  February 4,2012, 3:56pm
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myusernamehere wrote :
Perhaps. But with my aspergers, I doubt I'd be successful regardless of what I did.

Cheers
I don't think asperger's is the nail in the coffin. If you took advice from a councelor or even these boards that would help...even if it is not second nature to you the social skills you might lack that are preventing you from moving forward can be learned with practice....
 
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EccentricAmbiguity is offline EccentricAmbiguity Post #17  February 4,2012, 4:00pm
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Online dating is like going on a blind date...but here are the reasons that I often do not feel chemistry with someone:
1. Their pictures do not adequately represent them.
2. Their profile paints them out to be someone they are not (or I add my own interpretation to their profile that ends up being completely wrong.)
I would suggest making your pictures really accurate and making your profile appear as closely as possible to who you are.
 
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Ephemera is offline Ephemera Post #18  February 5,2012, 6:08am
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During the first three months that I ever used eH, I had my best woman friend and my best man friend fill out the profile for me (on paper - not my official one) and not only were the two me's completely different, they also had little in common with the me that I described. As I liked the me that I described, I stayed with that, but it was very enlightening to see how differently each person in our lives sees us. If someone is not into you from a profile or on the phone or e-mail or in person, it's helpful to remember that people bring their own perceptions and prejudices with them, it has very little to do with us. I am who I am; changeable as the weather and as inconsistant as my mother's cooking. It works for others or it doesn't but it almost always works for me.
 
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