Who pays for dates - the 5th and beyond!


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Newbie12 is offline Newbie12 Post #1  January 29,2012, 6:25pm
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So this girl and I have been on about 5 dates and she has even planned and taken me on an awesome date (which was date #4). Things are going extremely well and I'm just kind of wondering like from here on out do we trade off on who pays for the date, should I just assume to pay and then let her pay occasionally (she offers to chip in every time), some other arrangement? We both are comfortable financially--so I don't mind paying--but I just don't want to send the wrong message with my actions (or inactions, for that matter).

Very interested in any input or personal experiences!
 
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jme21 is offline jme21 Post #2  January 29,2012, 6:29pm
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By date 5 you should be close to becoming exclusive I would think so then I think it's fair to switch off or do a 2:1 type of deal, I guess it depends on what you are both comfortable with.
 
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jussmile is offline jussmile Post #3  January 29,2012, 6:32pm
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Don't these things just naturally fall into place? Can you really plan it?
 
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jussmile is offline jussmile Post #4  January 29,2012, 6:33pm
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It's also not always about "who's paying." Does she cook for you or do other things? Is she aware of your feelings on the matter? Have you ever talked to her about you believing "equal" means both rotating paying for dates?

Does it really matter?
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #5  January 29,2012, 6:35pm
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Newbie12 wrote :
Things are going extremely well
Then don't throw a wrench in it.
If you're both happy, why start changing the arrangement?
 
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ForwardUntoDawn is offline ForwardUntoDawn Post #6  January 29,2012, 6:38pm
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At date 5 this should not be an issue
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #7  January 29,2012, 6:39pm
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You can let her pay if she plans it and takes you out. That's what she's hoping to do since it makes her feel special and sexy and powerful. Otherwise, you should just pay as you have been doing.

Don't ever let her think you resent paying.
 
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Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #8  January 29,2012, 6:41pm
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Next time she wants to chip in or pay, just let her .... simple enough ?
 
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Newbie12 is offline Newbie12 Post #9  January 29,2012, 6:42pm
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TheThinker wrote :
Then don't throw a wrench in it.
If you're both happy, why start changing the arrangement?
Hmm not quite the responses I was looking for. I am not necessarily trying to change the "arrangement," but merely trying to adapt to a developing dating-ship (which happens to be somewhat uncharted territory for me). I wouldn't go as far as saying that seeking tips online is throwing a wrench in anything. #chill
 
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Newbie12 is offline Newbie12 Post #10  January 29,2012, 6:44pm
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harnomygirl wrote :
You can let her pay if she plans it and takes you out. That's what she's hoping to do since it makes her feel special and sexy and powerful. Otherwise, you should just pay as you have been doing.

Don't ever let her think you resent paying.
I really like this advice and will take it. Thanks!

/thread
 
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