going slow-its a good thirng right?


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nopressure11 is offline nopressure11 Post #1  January 15,2012, 4:22am
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After a couple months of casual conversations, he hit me with an honest explanation, which you have to respect. Apparently, dated a mutual acquantance for a few months that ended in hurt feelings and now hesitant.

Pretty much immediately after that, I felt a change. He seemed more open and called more often suggesting thigns to do, etc. I asked him why the 360 and it seems being honest about that was now allowing him to act on his feelings. Great!

Since then, things have been good! Several dates; movies and dinner, walks in the park, something as innocent as handholding is hot and sends the sparks flying and lots of passionate kisses. I defintely feel like we are both into each other. We are having the sexy back and forth, talking about what it will be like, when we finally have sex. The prelude and talk foreplay is half the fun!!

Guess I'm just feeling like I might be more into him than he is to me? Really have no basis for it, when we are together, he is attentive, a gentleman and definitely putting out that he likes me. However, sometimes get the feeling when we are not together that his life takes priority to spending time with me?

Trying not to over analyze or rush things. He is definitely a take things slow kind of person, and has his own thing going on as do I. I like him a lot and definitely see that we could be good together, just don't want ot be a "convenience" thing? I know, take a deep breath and relax right? LOL,
 
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4disney is offline 4disney Post #2  January 15,2012, 4:33am
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I think as long as you are making forward progress and you both are happy then let the relationship take it's time and develop.

I am not of the mindset that one person should be "pacing" the relationship if the other person is not getting what they need from the other. Only you can really know if you are satisfied with what you are putting in to what you are getting in return.

Good luck to you!!
 
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LongLocks is offline LongLocks Post #3  January 15,2012, 6:12am
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If you don't mind going slow and seeing where this may lead, then continue to date him. However, in my experience, men who were really interested in me never made that "going slow" comment and wanted to spend as much time with me as they could.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  January 15,2012, 6:18am
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4disney wrote :
I think as long as you are making forward progress and you both are happy then let the relationship take it's time and develop.
This ^^^
 
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emma_hazards is offline emma_hazards Post #5  January 15,2012, 7:03am
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Just curious, what about the relationship and the way you interact makes you feel that you are more into him than he is into you?

FWIW, no two people progress at the exact same pace in a relationship, especially at the beginning. As long as he's giving clear signals of increasing interest, and as long as the relationship is progressing, I wouldn't worry. Relax and enjoy the experience. See where it goes.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #6  January 15,2012, 8:53am
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His own life should be his priority....dating has a place in it but after a few dates you will not be the center of someone's universe
wrote :
However, sometimes get the feeling when we are not together that his life takes priority to spending time with me?
You seem to want a more involved, faster pace than he does at this point...he may catch up with you...just keep up what you are doing....Good Luck..
 
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nopressure11 is offline nopressure11 Post #7  January 15,2012, 11:32am
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I guess it's not one particular thing that he is 'doing', In retrospect, I think I need to readjust how I'm looking at things, and nto be so fast to rush things. I think that because, in my head, I'm eager to move forward, I am easily disappointed when the 'plans in my head' do not go through, which of course, is no fault of his!!

Yes, when we are together, there is no doubt that he is into me as he has no problem initiating handholding, kissing, hugging, etc. I do feel it is progressing. We have great chemistry, have things in common and I just have a good 'feeling' that it could be something good between us. I just have to slow myself down and enjoy this get-to-know-you part!!!!

Thanks for the encouraging words


emma_hazards wrote :
Just curious, what about the relationship and the way you interact makes you feel that you are more into him than he is into you?

FWIW, no two people progress at the exact same pace in a relationship, especially at the beginning. As long as he's giving clear signals of increasing interest, and as long as the relationship is progressing, I wouldn't worry. Relax and enjoy the experience. See where it goes.
 
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Ingytravel is offline Ingytravel Post #8  January 15,2012, 11:48am
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Is this the same man from your other posts where you all talked for a YEAR before going out on your first date?
 
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nopressure11 is offline nopressure11 Post #9  January 15,2012, 12:38pm
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Actually started talking to this guy while I was on the fence with the other, but have since wrote him off.
 
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emma_hazards is offline emma_hazards Post #10  January 15,2012, 5:55pm
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nopressure11 wrote :
I guess it's not one particular thing that he is 'doing', In retrospect, I think I need to readjust how I'm looking at things, and nto be so fast to rush things. I think that because, in my head, I'm eager to move forward, I am easily disappointed when the 'plans in my head' do not go through, which of course, is no fault of his!!

Yes, when we are together, there is no doubt that he is into me as he has no problem initiating handholding, kissing, hugging, etc. I do feel it is progressing. We have great chemistry, have things in common and I just have a good 'feeling' that it could be something good between us. I just have to slow myself down and enjoy this get-to-know-you part!!!!

Thanks for the encouraging words
You're welcome!

Try to avoid visualizing how the relationship will progress. Our imagination almost never matches up perfectly with the reality that unfolds, which both disappoints us and makes us question the value of what we do have. Not a good thing.

Again, sounds as if things are progressing. That's all you can ask for. Enjoy!
 
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