AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #1  January 12,2012, 10:18am
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This is an odd one and something I hadn't ever considered happening. But, now that it has, I wonder if there were potential dates deterred by this and if I can somehow make it not happen again.

I was at work on a check stand next to one where the light didn't work. I had people coming into my line while my co-worker didn't. He would pull people from my line to his, which is fine and actually what we are supposed to do.

A former co-worker was in my line but was pulled by my co-workers into his. No biggie, right? My former co-worker said something along the lines of "But, I wanted to chat with her!" My current co-worker said "She's married." I just barely caught the words over the music and beeping noises.

I finished with my customer and asked my co-worker (who was still ringing up my former co-worker) if he said I was married. He didn't answer but my former co-worker made light of it as he walked over to my now empty line and started to chat.

So, this got me thinking. Besides this co-worker not being in any position to know if I'm married or not, what were his motivations? (Let's just say he plays for the other team, so interest is not one.) How many time could this have happened before? I don't wear rings while at work, so there couldn't be "wrong" hand or finger confusion.

I'm not about to announce to my co-workers that I'm actively dating and would appreciate some assistance in this area. But, I sure don't need anyone turning away people on my behalf either.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  January 12,2012, 10:59am
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This is an odd one. I would expect that it is not a normal occurrence. I would also have to say that your co-worker's comment was totally out of line as something that he should say in the workplace.

Since you say your co-worker is gay (I assume that is what play for the other team means ) maybe his interest is in your former co-worker.
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #3  January 12,2012, 11:30am
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AndieIsMe wrote :
So, this got me thinking. Besides this co-worker not being in any position to know if I'm married or not, what were his motivations? (Let's just say he plays for the other team, so interest is not one.)
One, jealousy doesn't require romantic feelings. Time and attention you lavish on your former co-worker is time and attention not available to your current co-worker. Think Timon and Pumba in the Lion King. Simba finding his mate meant much less time for them and they immediately recognized that. Two, that he dates guys doesn't mean that he'd never try being with a woman if a good opportunity presented itself. I recall a man I knew in college who claimed to be turned off by women, but slept with a female friend when her inhibitions were down. She'd considered him "safe". For him, it was just a one-time thing to see if his tastes had changed, much as I occasionally test seafood.
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #4  January 12,2012, 11:35am
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For those who have not seen the Lion King--

Timon: I tell you, Pumbaa, this stinks.
Pumbaa: Oh. Sorry.
Timon: Not you. Them! Him. Her. Alone.
Pumbaa: What's wrong with that?
Timon: I can see what's happening
Pumbaa:What?
Timon:And they don't have a clue
Pumbaa:Who?
Timon:They'll fall in love and here's the bottom line. Our trio's down to two.
Pumbaa:Oh.
Timon:Ze sweet caress of twilight; There's magic everywhere; And with all this romantic atmosphere; Disaster's in the air.
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #5  January 12,2012, 11:53am
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This?
Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
T
Since you say your co-worker is gay maybe his interest is in your former co-worker.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #6  January 12,2012, 11:55am
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Hakuna Matata.
 
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ami1uwant is offline ami1uwant Post #7  January 12,2012, 2:13pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :

A former co-worker was in my line but was pulled by my co-workers into his. No biggie, right? My former co-worker said something along the lines of "But, I wanted to chat with her!" My current co-worker said "She's married." I just barely caught the words over the music and beeping noises.

I finished with my customer and asked my co-worker (who was still ringing up my former co-worker) if he said I was married. He didn't answer but my former co-worker made light of it as he walked over to my now empty line and started to chat.


He did this just to protect you from getting harrased without knowing what your prior relationship was to this person.

I dont think he thought you were married and he has likely seen past workers in your position get harrassed constantly by men trying to pick you up so he did that as a self defense mechanism for you.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #8  January 12,2012, 4:29pm
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Funny how guys will jump to "protect" someone when it's an obvious non-threatening situation but when someone starts screaming obscenities they can't seem to muster up a voice.
 
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