Plenty of Fish: Yea or nay for finding a long-term relationship?


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emma_hazards is offline emma_hazards Post #1  December 30,2011, 2:13pm
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Just curious…I notice a number of eHa members use POF. What has your experience been? Have you found folks interested in LTRs there? If someone was not interested in casual dating, but was looking for something long-term instead, would you recommend it or suggest another site?

I’m only interested in finding something long-term now, and was looking for ways to expand beyond eH in 2012. I’m happy with eH, but want to make sure I’m maximizing my chances of finding the right person. Thoughts? Suggestions? Other sites to consider if you live in a large metro area? Thanks!
 
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lissa783 is offline lissa783 Post #2  December 30,2011, 2:19pm
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I have been on eh, pof, okc, and match. I saw ALOT of the same people on all of them. Right now I have okc and eh and I feel that this covers my basis pretty well. I did not really like pof just because there seemed to be less serious people on there then other, but like I said, a ton of the same people in my area at least.
 
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Special-K is offline Special-K Post #3  December 30,2011, 2:33pm
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I have never tried POF, primarily b/c it's touted as the "hook-up site." That said, I do have a friend who met her bf on POF.

I have tried eH, OKC and Match. I've been the most consistently happy w/ Match. And while I had decent success w/ OKC, I found I had to to a LOT of weeding. The free sites draw a lot of bottom-feeders.

Lissa's right, though, you will find many of the same folks on all of them.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  December 30,2011, 2:43pm
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I looked at Plenty of Fishy, and found it plenty of scary! Every profile I looked at was basically an overweight drop-out, or a picture of cleavage.

I started to look at OK Cupid, but got involved with someone before I could finish a profile, so no actual experience. I might try this, if I tried online again.

eHarmony is sort of okay, but the sending dead profiles and refusal to allow me to screen out divorces and children is againt my wishes. Yo, the customer is always right!
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #5  December 30,2011, 4:06pm
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I can only remember meeting a small number of women from POF. That was a few years back.

I was also a member of 'match' and met 100s of members from that site.

The POF woman who turned up and was the kind of person I'd expect to have found on a site where no money is required. Unemployed, overweight, lacking in finance and so easy to get into bed that I found it unattractive.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #6  December 30,2011, 4:43pm
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emma_hazards wrote :
Just curious…I notice a number of eHa members use POF. What has your experience been?
I found POF to be a hook-up site and a site that "women of the evening" use as a place to contact clients.

Have you found folks interested in LTRs there?
See comment above.

If someone was not interested in casual dating, but was looking for something long-term instead, would you recommend it or suggest another site?
IMO you will find the most people that are looking for serious, long term releationships on eHarmony. The only other site that I consider to be reputable is Match. OK Cupid is a free site and while it is in a whole different league than POF in terms of quality, you get what you pay for. I have been on Chemistry as a NPM since it started and it is a very poor eHarmony wannabe. I was on Christian Mingle which is billed as a dating site but what I found it to be was a pen pal site and if you can't spout Scripture like the best evangelist then you are not going to be welcome by the other members of the site and, being the good Christians that they are , they don't have any problem tearing you a new one for not spouting Scripture for every little thing.

I’m only interested in finding something long-term now, and was looking for ways to expand beyond eH in 2012. I’m happy with eH, but want to make sure I’m maximizing my chances of finding the right person. Thoughts? Suggestions? Other sites to consider if you live in a large metro area?
Different sites work better in different locations and for different people. eHarmony has many unique feature such as the personality / values matching process and the Guided Communication process to help get the ball rolling. Match is well know as being a successful site for women. However, your success is largely based on your photos and your ability to not say stupid things in your profile. As a woman you do not need to worry about writing a decent "cold call" e-mail because women on Match NEVER initiate.
Thanks!
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  December 30,2011, 5:00pm
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
As a woman you do not need to worry about writing a decent "cold call" e-mail because women on Match NEVER initiate.

The ones who are worth meeting do.

A profile is only a stage; you still have to make the audience laugh.
 
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llw11 is offline llw11 Post #8  December 30,2011, 5:03pm
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D_Lion wrote :
...and refusal to allow me to screen out divorces and children is againt my wishes. Yo, the customer is always right!
can't you change your search criteria?
 
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llw11 is offline llw11 Post #9  December 30,2011, 5:08pm
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i've tried POF (the acronym speaks for itself actually,) and its terrible. you really get what you pay for. i'd agree that most of the profiles are crappy since no one there seems to be serious about finding anyone. most of the women don't bother to respond at all whereas on the paid sites i'd get about a 40-60% response rate. the women that do end up initiating are just...weird.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #10  December 30,2011, 5:12pm
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llw11 wrote :
can't you change your search criteria?

Yes: By not using eHarmony.
 
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