How many first dates do you average from eH?


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swirly is offline swirly Post #1  September 8,2011, 1:29pm
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I've joined eH exactly a month ago and have only had 1 date. I was expecting a bit more than that.

I know it varies a little. I live in a fairly popular metro area, lots of people in my age range, am fit and have above-average looks. TBH, I get approached by men in real life more than on eH. What gives? My pictures are accurate and my profile is honest.

So, how many dates per month do you average, if you are fairly selective?
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #2  September 8,2011, 1:36pm
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swirly wrote :
I've joined eH exactly a month ago and have only had 1 date. I was expecting a bit more than that.

I know it varies a little. I live in a fairly popular metro area, lots of people in my age range, am fit and have above-average looks. TBH, I get approached by men in real life more than on eH. What gives? My pictures are accurate and my profile is honest.

So, how many dates per month do you average, if you are fairly selective?
very very few. its really not per month as much as it was maybe one every three or so months, and most times i never wanted a second date. it was rare when i reached open communication with anyone and even more rare when we got past the phone call stage (you would be amazed at how many people cannot carry on a phone conversation!)

i live in a very populated area and i also have far more success in meeting people in real life than with online dating.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #3  September 8,2011, 1:55pm
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If you've been on EH for a month and you've already had one date, you just might be ahead of the curve!

I agree with what Nannette said. You will hear about some people who have lots and lots of contact, and lots and lots of dates from EH right out of the gate, and continuously. But, that has not been my experience. Frankly, the people that I met from EH were some of the worst matches compared to people that I have met from other sites. (Granted, that is a fairly small sample size).

The advertising for online dating makes it sound like once you set up a profile, you will be dating up a storm immediately. In truth, I think it usually takes more time than that. Unless you're hot, and young, and in a desired demographic, your success rate is typically going to be much lower than advertised.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  September 8,2011, 2:00pm
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When I actively used eHarmony (years ago), I met at most one person per month (and usually less.)

I would be satisfied with one reasonably-screened meeting per month, personally.

It's not suprising that more men approach in real life: there, I know less about a woman, and thus have fewer possible deal-breakers. In a profile, I close many matches for statements they have made that I would not have known about a stranger.
 
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savman is offline savman Post #5  September 8,2011, 2:17pm
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I think about one a month is decent if you are picky. I have been there about a year, but turned it off several times to concentrate on one person. I would guess that when I turned it back on I had a date in less than a month usually, but not a lot less most of the time.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #6  September 8,2011, 2:35pm
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swirly wrote :
I've joined eH exactly a month ago and have only had 1 date. I was expecting a bit more than that.

I know it varies a little. I live in a fairly popular metro area, lots of people in my age range, am fit and have above-average looks. TBH, I get approached by men in real life more than on eH. What gives? My pictures are accurate and my profile is honest.

So, how many dates per month do you average, if you are fairly selective?
Being desperate and totally non-selective I would say that in the 3 years that I was highly active on eHarmony I averaged about 1 to 2 (first) dates per month.

If you have good success IRL why are you even trying eHarmony (or any online dating site)
 
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swirly is offline swirly Post #7  September 8,2011, 3:14pm
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
If you have good success IRL why are you even trying eHarmony (or any online dating site)
I'm pretty sure I get approached solely on my looks. Most of the time, these men do not meet one of my deal-breakers (such as education, career and income level, etc). That was why I wanted to try a dating site.
Last edited by swirly; September 8,2011 at 3:16pm.
 
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lunabeach is offline lunabeach Post #8  September 8,2011, 3:15pm
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The first month I went on 2, the second month 6, the third month was zero (school started, I was scrabbling for equilibrium), the fourth month 3, then dated one of those for a couple months and haven't used eH since b/c I prefer meeting people in person. There was a fifth month in there somewhere - I met around a dozen men from eH, but it was about a year ago so things are fuzzy. Since it's getting cooler out it will get harder to meet new people and, if I don't meet anyone in my classes this semester, I may re-up.

It ebbs and flows. You can talk to ten people and only meet one or talk to ten and get to phone/face with all of them.
Last edited by lunabeach; September 8,2011 at 3:18pm.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #9  September 8,2011, 3:32pm
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even though my photo was fairly rubbish within a few weeks of joining I got a first "meet" (I don't call it a date for the first time I meet someone). She was lovely but not for me. And then after that probably the opportunity to meet roughly one to four per month.

why do you ask?
 
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LDJ is offline LDJ Post #10  September 8,2011, 3:52pm
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In a year on eH i went on two first dates, I was very selective as I think everyone should be. The first became a two month relationship and the 2nd is now a ten month relationship.

Like the OP, my profile pics were accurate, both matches I met told me so. Like the OP I did and continue to get IRL dating opportunities frequently, probably monthly. I went with online because I have faith in the screening process and becasue I wanted to chosoe what I felt were the best matches for me, rather than only be able to accept or decline the IRL options, as most of those were not good matches.
 
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