Fun times at the OkC corral


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niqht is offline niqht Post #1  September 3,2011, 2:04pm
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A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love

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Omg, the serious funnies I thought I'd share on this slow Sat afternoon.
Trying to talk with a girl, who, despite my standard claim of no religious people, seemed grounded and genuine. She was attractive, but wrote little in her profile. And here is how it went...

Me wrote :
I think you just might be cheating a little with that first picture being a few years old
However, since I can't quite tell when comparing to your other pictures, if by chance I'm wrong, that is totally a compliment
Her wrote :
Oh really? Are u speaking of the picture with my girlfriends in it?
Me wrote :
Yes. The first, main one with your friends looks younger. But, I couldn't possibly hold that against you . It is hard to have good pictures and then choose a single one to catch someone's attention.
And still.. the more I look, the less I can tell if that is even true...


Had any luck on here? I read so frequently that women get flooded with stupid messages.
Her wrote :
The picture u r talking about is the most recent of the 3. Taken 1 month ago. The other two are also from this year. I have no need or desire to pretend to be something I am not. I have had a lot of stupid messages but yours is definately the lamest one I have ever received. If you do intend on actually getting a date on here or anywhere else for that matter you might want to consider changing your strategy.
Me wrote :
Haha. I have gotten dates and talked to many, although as is the case out in the real world, it is the rare gem that turns into something.

As long as we are now tossing out 'advice', as it were, if you were to write enough in your profile to base a conversion off of, one wouldn't have to grasp at straws in an attempt to chat with you.

There is no strategy beyond attempting to be as unique as possible because the overwhelming majority of everything we send gets ignored. While it obviously didn't go the direction I hoped, nor did you take my joking in the intended fashion, I'm truly just happy you replied.
I would like to point out in my defense that any emotionally healthy woman would have been flattered at the realization that the picture being referred to as her younger self is, in fact, her most current.

Yes, I did just say that, and happy internet adventures to you.

Ladies.. was I wrong? Too much of a 'butt'? (annoying filter)
Even so, I enjoyed it anyway.
 
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tangochef is offline tangochef Post #2  September 3,2011, 2:25pm
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enjoying NYC.

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Push/Pull doesn't really work via email.
 
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Shelby is offline Shelby Post #3  September 3,2011, 2:36pm
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said what she meant; meant what she said.

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Seems like you accused her of putting old photos on her profile, and your backhanded compliment wasn't really flirtatious enough to bypass the slap she thought you were giving her.
 
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tjlpd is offline tjlpd Post #4  September 3,2011, 2:49pm
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loves a flirt

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Accusations and insults do not go over well in online dating. I would have not responded to the first message.
 
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niqht is offline niqht Post #5  September 3,2011, 2:51pm
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tangochef wrote :
Push/Pull doesn't really work via email.

It does with people that don't assume the worst of others.
Where I came from in ex land, she could take nearly anything as some sort of attack on her, so I am quite sensitive to it now.
Just trying to be fun and playful with someone.. how many smilies do I need really?



Shelby wrote :
Seems like you accused her of putting old photos on her profile, and your backhanded compliment wasn't really flirtatious enough to bypass the slap she thought you were giving her.
Accusing is way too strong a word. Suggesting maybe? And I never cared anyway, it was just a point to talk about.
 
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lunabeach is offline lunabeach Post #6  September 3,2011, 3:04pm
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tjlpd wrote :
Accusations and insults do not go over well in online dating. I would have not responded to the first message.
Yup. I was talking with friends today, many of whom are single and dating, and we all have met more than a few men/women who start right off with backhanded compliments and insults. A male friend of mine (who is a psychiatrist) has stopped dating two women in a row for pulling "I like how dorky you are" - it's their way of saying "I like you for something other people won't value in you" as well as "you think you're hot? well I don't even like that about you." He's very handsome and not dorky at all but he is very, very smart.

It's a control thing and often stems from low self esteem.

Night, you say you were just striking up a conversation and I'm willing to take you at your word - but it is a negative comment and it will be taken negatively.
Last edited by lunabeach; September 3,2011 at 3:09pm.
 
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maffif is offline maffif Post #7  September 3,2011, 3:27pm
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Happy!

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First impressions are everything and hard to back track after making a bad one. Since you don't know someone you are emailing on a dating site, you don't know their sense of humor either. It would be better to wait and get to know someone to see if they get your type of humor.

I am not sure how I would have responded to your email. I think a lot of women wouldn't like you stating that they were posting on old pic especially since it really wasn't. Probably why she didn't get your joke... the picture wasn't old. Thus it wasn't funny to her.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  September 3,2011, 5:14pm
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I'm crippled by the fear That I've fallen too far to love

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Takes all kinds
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #9  September 3,2011, 5:40pm
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mixing metaphors in a mellifluous melange of malapropisms

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You seriously led with that?! And expected her to do what? Giggle and say "Oh, yeah, I know that totally looks like an out of date picture, because I am way more haggard-looking and shopworn now, been around the block a few times, you know? Oh, and, BTW, I have gained about 30 pounds since that photo... So, wanna meet for coffee tomorrow?"



(I can use emoticons too )

Remember that "humor", especially sarcastic humor, doesn't tend to go over well via email, and even less with people you have never met before. Sure, OKC can be a kind of scary place, just like with all online dating sites. But, there are plenty of real, honest people on there looking for real, honest relationships. And you just insulted this woman by assuming she was lying as your first line of introduction.



(Sorry, this just warrants another one).
 
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Ingytravel is offline Ingytravel Post #10  September 3,2011, 5:46pm
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Yea...I would have pretty much reacted the same way that she did...Both your messages to her sound rude and condescending....As others have said...starting off by accusations that she is lying about the photos...and then you 'retaliate' because of her message to you...

Just seems petty when you could have just taken the high road and said.."I'm sorry for mistaking the photos to be older and then using a bad attempt at humor....I truly do wish you luck in your search"...

The whole situation started out in the wrong way and went downhill from there...To me, I like to assume the best in people until the actually SHOW me a reason to think otherwise...

Oh well...
 
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