SassyNana is offline SassyNana Post #31  September 4,2011, 11:22am
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oknowplz wrote :
My brother went to an appointment with me (we had plans for later that evening) and was not impressed with her at all.

To get deeper into the story also, I was hospitalized, and she didn't even seem to care. I don't mean care like a parent would...that's not what a therapist is supposed to do...but she did not seem the least bit concerned and treated the next appointment as if nothing happened.

We also weren't clicking anyway (not either her fault or mine...just wasn't any rapport)...so I addressed all of this to her, and she went on the defensive, accused me of accusing her of being bad at her job (which is not what I was saying) and accused me of transference.

I'm not expecting anything out of my current therapist other than good insight and caring about my improvement...both of which I think he will offer...and if by some chance (which I doubt, but still) I was hospitalized or something (which like I said I have better ways of handling things now) that he'd show some compassion...not that of a family member or close friend, but of someone who doesn't want to see his patient fall down.

As for the dating...I don't expect that out of the person...simply her liking me, not judging me, and being attracted to me on some level is enough.
It sounds to me as though you're not in a good place to be dating at all. Sometimes it's a kindness to ourselves when we take time out to take care of "me".

Also, I wonder if your brother attending a therapy session with you was appropriate. I mean, unless he had something beneficial to add, why would he have gone in with you? Could he not have waited in the reception area? Do you think this might have influenced the way your therapist responded?

I'm surprised you were only diagnosed with Asperger's in the last few years. Since this is the case, does this mean that since you weren't diagnosed as a child that you haven't learned a lot of the coping skills that early diagnosis would have afforded?

I wish you the best.
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #32  September 4,2011, 12:24pm
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SassyNana wrote :
I'm surprised you were only diagnosed with Asperger's in the last few years. Since this is the case, does this mean that since you weren't diagnosed as a child that you haven't learned a lot of the coping skills that early diagnosis would have afforded?
It is not unusual at all for a diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome to not be made until adulthood. The symptoms vary from Aspie to Aspie, and it is not widely understood by doctors. The diagnosis/name has not been around all that long, and it is actually rare for it to be diagnosed in young children as the characteristics are often written off as quirkiness. It is also very common for there to be co-morbid conditions, making diagnosis more complicated.

My own son was tested for Asperger's Syndrome in 5th grade and we were told "no" he didn't have it. Upon re-testing at 11th grade, they decided "yes" he did. Unfortunately, there are no medications and the very limited therapies for it are rarely covered by insurance. Regardless, learning "coping skills" does not make it go away, just a bit easier to function.
 
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oknowplz is offline oknowplz Post #33  September 4,2011, 1:26pm
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Thank you for posting that Wonder Woman. If anything, life was more difficult before the Asperger diagnosis because I had no idea what it was, had never heard of it before, and thought I was just some rare mistake.

There is also no cure for it or getting rid of it...you can learn coping skills, which I have, but contrary what Jenny McCarthy wants you to believe, mercury doesn't cure autism.

I'm not even looking to date seriously, just want sex with a connection, not necessarily a serious relationship.
 
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oknowplz is offline oknowplz Post #34  September 4,2011, 6:00pm
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I've been told this is kind of a PG-13 board, so I'll try to keep it PG-13...but I have a general question...is the kind of sex/love making I want even possible or just something you see in movies?

When I fooled around with the first girl, she'd whisper dirty things in my ear, and it's not what I wanted at all. I wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked and how I felt about her.

I'm not claiming to be some innocent person. God knows I've looked at my share of naked pictures of women in my lifetime. But my reasons for wanting sex are different it seems than the majority.

I dream of making love to songs like "New York Minute" by Don Henley and "I'm not the only one" by Bonnie Raitt. (Yes I realize I'm weird lol.) and hope this was PG-13 enough.
 
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oknowplz is offline oknowplz Post #35  September 5,2011, 5:41pm
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A few other songs I want to make love to (sue me I'm bored):

November Rain (Guns N Roses)
I'm your baby tonight (Whitney Houston)
Sometimes love just ain't enough (Don Henley/Patti Smyth)
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #36  September 5,2011, 5:56pm
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oknowplz, you need to start new threads for new topics. Take a look at the board titles and select the one best suited to your new topic. We also have a popular sex ed group called Let's Talk About Sex (LTAS). You can join that group and post questions there if you like. Here is a link. Dating Advice, Relationship Advice, and Free Dating Tips
 
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