MW77009 is offline MW77009 Post #1  August 16,2011, 9:37am
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Hi;

I have been a user of EH on and off for about 5 years. At the end of my last relationship, I decided to try Match instead. I carefully constructed a profile, had it reviewed by a professional who helped me spiff it up, vetted it through friends and posted it. I decided not to take the shot gun approach so I have spent a lot of time carefully selecting matches that seem to have similar interests, values and goals and writing customised brief messages. The results after three months and countless hours hunched over a computer? Bupkis/Nada.
I rejoined EH under a promo recently and have already had better success with far less work.

Has anyone had this experience with Match? I feel like it is a big waste of my time.
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #2  August 16,2011, 9:42am
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I do great with Match, better than any other site, but the talk is that Match largely favors females.
EH is a complete waste of time and money for me; the last time I re-upped I did it because I was bored ( and missing sharing the 'Oh my god do you believe these profiles!!!' stories with my friends).
 
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LoveComes1st is offline LoveComes1st Post #3  August 16,2011, 10:21am
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I met quite a few men on Match but they weren't what I was looking for. So I decided to try eH again for 3 mos. And I decided to give Match one last try but this time I decided to wink and send emails instead of responding to men who contacted me. Lo and behold I met 2 men from Match this way who were more of what I was looking for, and decided to exclusively date one of these guys and see where that goes.

I also met 1 man on EH (before I found my current Match guy) and ironically he was also on Match but we never noticed each other there due to our search filters. Turns out we weren't a good fit. But this made me realize that Match is a lot more work to find the right person because there's just so many options. I also noticed that men I met from Match had a tendency to be more of the "look for the next best thing" type because there's just so many people for them to look at and watch for. This was especially true of men who had just newly joined the service. I had quite a few men in communication in EH to the point that I stopped my matches. But once I settled on my special Match guy I let all the others go.

With EH people take the time to review the profiles because fewer are presented and the ppl that buy into the personality matching stuff seem to take the profiles more seriously (I can tell from comments they make).

I've noticed that things really hop more when first joining a dating site. Given this if I use them again in the future I'm going to alternate between eH and Match using 3 mos subscriptions (and coupons).
Last edited by LoveComes1st; August 16,2011 at 10:24am. Reason: edited......
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  August 16,2011, 11:42am
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MW77009 wrote :
Hi;

I have been a user of EH on and off for about 5 years. At the end of my last relationship, I decided to try Match instead. I carefully constructed a profile, had it reviewed by a professional who helped me spiff it up, vetted it through friends and posted it. I decided not to take the shot gun approach so I have spent a lot of time carefully selecting matches that seem to have similar interests, values and goals and writing customised brief messages. The results after three months and countless hours hunched over a computer? Bupkis/Nada.
I rejoined EH under a promo recently and have already had better success with far less work.

Has anyone had this experience with Match? I feel like it is a big waste of my time.
This pretty much mirrors my experience on Match.

The US demographics for Match is 51% female which should give guys a slight edge in having success. Unfortunately the geographic information on Match is not available so it could be that for Houston the demographic is a high percentage male which would make it a highly active site for females in your area and really suck for the guys.

I have been told that Match is highly effective for the girls. No so good for the guys. Luckily I was told this before I signed up on Match again.
 
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MW77009 is offline MW77009 Post #5  August 16,2011, 12:38pm
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I think there must be some sort of psychology to it. A few hypotheses: 1) perhaps there is a bit of a halo effect produced on EH by all that business about being matched on 10 billion points of compatability that makes people actually work harder; 2) another possiblity is that people get so bombarded with all the choices on match that they are always waiting for something better to come along and therefore it is easier if the matches are dolled out a few at a time; 3) there are a lot of people who just put up a profile for attention with no intention of ever dating anyone.

Incidentally, if you want to see bad profiles, match has some real winners. I would say that the vast majority that I see are mediocre such that it makes it hard to respond because they say nothing substantive about the person who wrote it.
 
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nick222 is offline nick222 Post #6  August 16,2011, 1:45pm
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MW77009 wrote :
I decided not to take the shot gun approach so I have spent a lot of time carefully selecting matches that seem to have similar interests, values and goals and writing customised brief messages. The results after three months and countless hours hunched over a computer? Bupkis/Nada.
To have success as a male on Match, you really do need to do the "shotgun approach", I'm sorry to say. I'm not saying you need to contact every woman you see, but certainly more than a few. In a metro area the size of Houston, you should be able to be reasonably selective with who you contact and still have hundreds (or dozens at the very least) of potential contacts. I live in a similarly large metro area, and even when I filtered my searches by age, education level, political views, body type, children, and last login, there were still more of interest to me than I could ever possibly contact.

The upside to eH is that there are far fewer men who can contact the same women as you. The downside is that there are far fewer women you can contact.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #7  August 16,2011, 3:06pm
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MW77009 wrote :
Hi;

I have been a user of EH on and off for about 5 years. At the end of my last relationship, I decided to try Match instead. I carefully constructed a profile, had it reviewed by a professional who helped me spiff it up, vetted it through friends and posted it. I decided not to take the shot gun approach so I have spent a lot of time carefully selecting matches that seem to have similar interests, values and goals and writing customised brief messages. The results after three months and countless hours hunched over a computer? Bupkis/Nada.
I rejoined EH under a promo recently and have already had better success with far less work.

Has anyone had this experience with Match? I feel like it is a big waste of my time.
yes when I used Match I started out how you did your thing and got almost no results. I then discovered you had to wink at 100s to get a response, re-write the profile to be unique, email 100s to get a response, spend most of each sunday doing all this. Then from all that hard work I'd get dates/sex/relationships/insane dates/new friends.

I don't think I'd ever bother with Match again unless they improved/fixed it substantially.

All that hassle and work using 'match' .... all it does is make you cynical and in my opinion that's the route to becoming a 'player'.

I used 'match' on and off for about 5 years up until approx 6 months ago. In that time I met 100s of women. Most appeared to be going from one man to the next and in their profiles claiming to be seeking a relationship but in reality just out to be entertained. Fortunately, in those 100s there were plenty of genuine and amazing women. It depends if you want to put in hours/days/months of work to seek "the one".
Last edited by SteveManchesterEngland; August 16,2011 at 3:13pm.
 
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sony12 is offline sony12 Post #8  August 16,2011, 4:18pm
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I don't know how accurate that 51% female rate for match is but it seems everyone you talk to says there are about twice as many male matches in their area as female matches (and it would probably even be a greater difference if you got into male vs female membership rates).

By the same token since Eharmony has traditionally advertised itself as a serious relationship and marriage site (people say match has started to do this as well so maybe a hundred years from now it will turn a way from being viewed as a hook up site) it seems to attract a few more females and few less males. Also since they don't give you all your matches at once members are more prone to talk to the matches they currently do have.

So because of that some guys are able to juggle female matches just as much as women tend to juggle male matches (on eharmony). But that still doesn't mean the 1-6's will have much success (just the 7-10 guys will get a decent amount of success on eharmony where they would probably have to work much harder to get much success on match).

I myself very very seldom go a week without talking to anyone and I often am talking to two or three at a time. And if one person falls out (either by my decision or her decision) there is often someone just around the corner to take her place.
Last edited by sony12; August 16,2011 at 9:02pm.
 
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sony12 is offline sony12 Post #9  August 16,2011, 4:30pm
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SteveManchesterEngland wrote :
yes when I used Match I started out how you did your thing and got almost no results. I then discovered you had to wink at 100s to get a response, re-write the profile to be unique, email 100s to get a response, spend most of each sunday doing all this. Then from all that hard work I'd get dates/sex/relationships/insane dates/new friends.
That's why when I did join match I quit using it after about two days because I view it to be a total bore sending out all those silly winks or 'hey, how you doing' emails to nameless profiles. Many times not even to people you are interested in but just to get someone to talk to you. And if you are a guy that is exactly what you have to do to have any luck.
 
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maffif is offline maffif Post #10  August 16,2011, 4:32pm
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I have dated one guy from EH and one guy from Match in the last year. But, I seem to get more dates from Match than EH. I have also noticed things happening more when you first join a site.

I haven't been having a lot of success either, but that is on me because I haven't been putting a lot of effort into it.
Last edited by maffif; August 16,2011 at 4:35pm.
 
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