Giving up on dating HOT/HOT guys!


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jussmile is offline jussmile Post #1  June 14,2011, 7:55am
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"Looks" or at least societal definitions of attractive guys was never really high on my priority list. Although we all have our different opinions about what a Perfect 10 might be, one person's 10 could be another person's 6 or 7 (or lower!). So, when I talk about hot/hot... obviously, I mean my definition, when referencing guys I think are hot, and each person can use their own point of reference...

But, I actually think there is a reason to avoid hot/hot guys. From the men I have met, they are visual creatures, so I think are in a better position to pursue women they think are hot/hot... because that is what is higher on their priority list. With dating hot/hot guys... at least the ones I have met... it just seems like these guys are not ready for or potentially not looking for a relationship. This has happened twice in the two years that I have been dating... now granted, I have only dated two hot/hot guys... so this makes it 2-0.

I'm no expert, but I think I will avoid the "hotties" for now.

I hate to generalize, because I know all people are different... but I don't think I'm the only one who believes that hot/hot guys just might not be the best catches when you're in your late 30's and early 40's.

But, why?
 
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myusernamehere is offline myusernamehere Post #2  June 14,2011, 8:44am
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You are very wise, my friend. If more women thought like you the world would be a better place.
 
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tangochef is offline tangochef Post #3  June 14,2011, 8:49am
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I am sure that the not-so-hot guys are popping champagne right now.
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #4  June 14,2011, 8:49am
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So the real question is: Is the potential date ready, willing and able to pursue an LTR.

One result of this is a personal policy (which may attract flamethrowers) to not to date never-married bachelors over the age of 38.

I don't mind dealing with prior relationship failure. But if he has never found an acceptable woman he was willing to commit to by 38, unless he was a monk, I don't think I am going to be the ONE.
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #5  June 14,2011, 8:50am
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myusernamehere wrote :
You are very wise, my friend. If more women thought like you the world would be a better place.
I could be wrong but I think she wants a physical relationship with her date eventually, MUNH. I don't think she's ruling out every man she finds attractive, just the blindingly hot ones.
 
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predfan1980 is offline predfan1980 Post #6  June 14,2011, 8:53am

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I'm in the same boat but of course I'm dealing with these things about hot women.
 
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Sparky68 is offline Sparky68 Post #7  June 14,2011, 9:02am
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predfan1980 wrote :
I'm in the same boat but of course I'm dealing with these things about hot women.
The "HOT" women I've dated are often the worst. I avoid them as a rule. I'm not saying there's not a "HOT" woman who isn't all that and a bag of chips but I've yet to see one that's all that. I'll take down to earth, well rounded and attractive inside and out over "HOT" any day.
 
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predfan1980 is offline predfan1980 Post #8  June 14,2011, 9:05am

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Sparky68 wrote :
The "HOT" women I've dated are often the worst. I avoid them as a rule. I'm not saying there's not a "HOT" woman who isn't all that and a bag of chips but I've yet to see one that's all that. I'll take down to earth, well rounded and attractive inside and out over "HOT" any day.
I agree with that man. I'm normally don't get my hopes up when I send "HOT" women questions during communication.
 
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Xable is offline Xable Post #9  June 14,2011, 9:11am
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I'm finding that it's best to avoid people at the extremes. The really hot hot guys are often times self absorbed. The really ugly guys tend to be unrealistic. Both seem only interested in a girl who is a 9 or a 10.

So, I find the people who tend to treat me with the most kindness are just your everyday Joes in the 4 to 6 range.
 
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Harryoss is offline Harryoss Post #10  June 14,2011, 9:22am
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One could argue that it's even better to date the HOT/HOT guys, because they are the most likely to have a lot of women expressing interest in them, and therefore are the most like to... when looking for a LTR... to be looking for it for the right reasons, as opposed to doing so because they have no other choice in the matter, because in their experience no other woman has expressed interest in them.

So it all blows down to a matter of you willing to take on a bit of competition from your fellow female friends, in order to find a guy who truly wants to be with you for who you are.

Now of course, I'm not saying you should try to tame the stallion knowing full well the likelihood of him committing to an LTR is close to nil... You should run from such a person first chance you get, absolutely! But do you really think that the majority of hot guys in their late 30's and on are still doing the whole casual dating scene and not looking for anything more?Maybe they'd be doing that with the people they don't actually like or want to settle down with, while they bide their time trying to find the right person... but not with the right person I don't think. I'd say you've just run into 2 bad apples and are now generalizing for no good reason.

The bottom line is: Which would you rather end up with? A guy who chose you because he had no other choice? or the guy who chose you when he had a million other choices as well?
 
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