"looking for a high quality partner"


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beccaf87 is offline beccaf87 Post #11  May 7,2011, 12:45pm
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A guy saying "up for a challenge" makes me think he will be difficult. It is more of a turn off for me.
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #12  May 7,2011, 12:49pm
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cb858 wrote :
"Looking for a high quality partner." That's a bit intimidating.
Nah. Everyone thinks they are a "high quality" person, whether they are or not.

cb858 wrote :
So is "wanting someone who is up for a challenge" because he will challenge his partner "in many ways."
Sounds like a difficult and argumentative guy to me. I'd pass.

cb858 wrote :
This is all new to me. Is this the norm?
Unfortunately, yes, it is the norm.
 
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cb858 is offline cb858 Post #13  May 7,2011, 12:53pm
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Wonderwoman402 wrote :
Nah. Everyone thinks they are a "high quality" person, whether they are or not.
Makes one wonder what HIS definition is and if anyone could ever be "high quality" enough for him.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #14  May 7,2011, 1:06pm
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OlderButWiser0549 wrote :
Ummm... sounds to me like he's looking for a woman to support him.

For some reason, "wanting someone who is up for a challenge" strikes me as vaguely... creepy. Dunno what to make of it.
Shelby wrote :
Appears he needs some one of high quality to meet his high-maintenance needs.

I don't agree.

I see this as being competitive. Like, he will go skiing or biking, and take the hardest trails as fast as possible. He will fall often, and doesn't mind. But, he will be bored with a partner who is slow and careful.

I don't see this as bad per se, but it is potentially a risk for compatibility.
 
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cb858 is offline cb858 Post #15  May 7,2011, 1:17pm
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D_Lion wrote :
I don't agree.

I see this as being competitive. Like, he will go skiing or biking, and take the hardest trails as fast as possible. He will fall often, and doesn't mind. But, he will be bored with a partner who is slow and careful.

I don't see this as bad per se, but it is potentially a risk for compatibility.

You could be right on the competitive thing...but for everything to point out that she must be high quality, loving, up for a challenge....that makes me think the relationship will be all about him. His goal: find someone with a good sense of humor. I read his other requirements and laughed, so do I qualify?

I don't want competitive at home, unless I'm playing Scrabble

You could be correct in your initial assessment of the profile being badly written.
 
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mitchell175 is offline mitchell175 Post #16  May 7,2011, 1:24pm
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D_Lion wrote :
I don't agree.

I see this as being competitive. Like, he will go skiing or biking, and take the hardest trails as fast as possible. He will fall often, and doesn't mind. But, he will be bored with a partner who is slow and careful.

I don't see this as bad per se, but it is potentially a risk for compatibility.
I agree with D_Lion here. I don't see his comments as inherently negative, or "difficult". I see this as perhaps how he has been burned in the past by "lower quality partners". People with substance abuse problems. People who had negative personalities. People who just made his life difficult. Etc.

Yes, his comments scream of baggage. And, that would be more of a concern. However, one thing I have learned in my time online dating, and also reading the boards, is that assumptions are the single biggest relationship (or potential relationship) killer. I like to give everyone the benefit of the doubt - even if I may be a little skeptical at first. Let them prove themselves. Or not.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #17  May 7,2011, 1:29pm
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cb858 wrote :
I don't want competitive at home, unless I'm playing Scrabble

I'd say the odds aren't great, but ...

I think you sell yourself short to disqualify yourself, and read too much into vague comments to disqualify the match.
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #18  May 7,2011, 1:43pm
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I would try to find out what he means. We can speculate all day and night and still not get what he "means".

Is this the Civil War reenactment guy? Someone else?

He also could be lost for the correct wording.He could also mean he doesn't want someone who is a doormat. Or, someone who has different interests and will encourage him to join her in those new adventures.
 
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cb858 is offline cb858 Post #19  May 7,2011, 1:55pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
I would try to find out what he means. We can speculate all day and night and still not get what he "means".

Is this the Civil War reenactment guy? Someone else?

He also could be lost for the correct wording.He could also mean he doesn't want someone who is a doormat. Or, someone who has different interests and will encourage him to join her in those new adventures.

Nope, not the reenactment guy...who sent a couple of nice chatty emails with good questions for me to answer.

I was just reading the matches that arrived for me today and started chuckling about the wording of one or two. I tend to be somewhat impatient with people who feel they must try to use terminology and/or phrases they're not familiar with or that others will have trouble understanding. It's so much better, especially online, to keep it simple for us lackwits
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #20  May 7,2011, 3:51pm
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That sounds like a couple matches I got.
Mostly it was from tri-athletes and the like.

Basically he probably IS looking for someone who is in the 90th percentile in lots of areas.

I tend to find people like that rigid. I like someone successful and active without them being controlling, preachy or over-scheduled.
 
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