How do you bring up exclusivity?


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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #51  April 28,2011, 1:50pm
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shapeShifter79 wrote :
You don't kiss on dates, or you don't consider a deep kiss intimate? KikiAZ's version of multi-dating sounds much more appealing to me.

Zero means zero. I don't have any desire to exchange saliva with some random men I just met and don't really know.

It may have happened elsewhere, but I met most of my girlfriends in college or in the workplace where almost round-the-clock close proximity and common friends would've made it obvious.

Unless you are with a person 24/7/365 you cannot say with any certainty that they never went out on a date with someone else while tossing the idea of dating you around.


Care to share these techniques? I have three women interested in dates right now and I'm dense when it comes to signals.

I don't date women so not much help here for ya.

Wait... three dates... oh no! Would that make me a multi-dater?!

Gasp....why yes, yes it does. Welcome to the club!
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LDJ is offline LDJ Post #52  April 28,2011, 3:42pm
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I'm just wondering if not making physical intimacy contingent on emotional intimacy would result in more authentic emotional intimacy?
 
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Lindac7 is offline Lindac7 Post #53  April 28,2011, 10:52pm
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LDJ,

The thing is, you could be having tons of physical intimacy with someone while not having any emotional intimacy.

I don't see how engaging in physical intimacy would result in more authentic emotional intimacy. If the two people involved are mature and able to share their thoughts/feelings with each other, authentic emotional intimacy is always perfectly possible. Physical intimacy is not required for this.

The problem with this theoretically is that a lot of men have a hard time expressing their feelings except through physical intimacy. I understand this, but it doesn't mean it has to be that way. Maybe they just need to stretch out of their comfort zone a bit and show more emotional maturity out of the sack.

I also believe that if a man truly loves a woman enough, he will still love her and eventually get up the nerve to be emotionally intimate with her whether they are having sex or not.
 
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LDJ is offline LDJ Post #54  April 29,2011, 2:09pm
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Lindac7 wrote :
LDJ,

The thing is, you could be having tons of physical intimacy with someone while not having any emotional intimacy.

The above threads are saying that this is not possible for most women and many men.

I don't see how engaging in physical intimacy would result in more authentic emotional intimacy.

Because you could rest the concern that the emotional intimacy was insincere as a means of getting to the physical inttimacy.

If the two people involved are mature and able to share their thoughts/feelings with each other, authentic emotional intimacy is always perfectly possible.

This would be the ultimate, but it is very rare.

Physical intimacy is not required for this.

No it isnt, my point was to untwine the two.

The problem with this theoretically is that a lot of men have a hard time expressing their feelings except through physical intimacy. I understand this, but it doesn't mean it has to be that way. Maybe they just need to stretch out of their comfort zone a bit and show more emotional maturity out of the sack.

Or could it be just as reasonable to expect women to allow men to engage in the physical intimacy while awaiting for the emotional intimacy to develop or catch up.

I also believe that if a man truly loves a woman enough, he will still love her and eventually get up the nerve to be emotionally intimate with her whether they are having sex or not.
...
 
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