Might've found "her"...how do I not scare her off?


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paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #11  March 15,2011, 8:29am
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No feet-sweeping whatsoever! Kiss of death! Avoid at all costs!

And i'm not joking!

Back up (in your head and your emotions) and just treat this like any other meet n greet - just an opportunity, one among many, to meet someone new and see if the two of you hit it off.

Eat at a normal, comfortable place and be your normal, every day self, and don't sweat the small or the big stuff. Maybe it's a match, maybe not.

Good luck!
 
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KevinMcy is offline KevinMcy Post #12  March 15,2011, 9:44am
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Hey guys,

Thanks for all the advice...I guess I'll try to keep myself from getting too ahead and just treat this like a normal first lunch date. Maybe flowers for the second time around? Thanks for all the input :-)
 
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KevinMcy is offline KevinMcy Post #13  March 15,2011, 9:45am
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Hey guys,

Thanks for all the advice...I guess I'll try to keep myself from getting too ahead and just treat this like a normal first lunch date. Maybe flowers for the second time around? Thanks for all the input :-)
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #14  March 15,2011, 10:31am
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The thing with flowers is bring flowers whenever you will meet her at her house so she can put them in a vase and not have to deal with carrying them around all day. That way it won't be awkward for her and the flowers won't die by the end of the day either. She'll actually be able to enjoy them that way.
 
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SweetKisses is offline SweetKisses Post #15  March 16,2011, 1:48pm
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It's very hard to scare off a person who wants you. Just be yourself and if she's really the right one for you, that should be enough.
 
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pisto is offline pisto Post #16  March 25,2011, 10:32pm
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He said she lives 4.5 hours away, not that she's driving...

My instinct tells me if she's driving more than 1 hour to meet you, flowers are OK. If you're doing all the driving, it might be too strong.
 
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Davidnellas is offline Davidnellas Post #17  March 26,2011, 11:44am
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I'm 50 yrs old and in all this time, I've learned a few things. Women want the same as men. They want to be in LOVE and they want to feel LOVED. Some women have been hurt by ex's that cheated on them or abused them. Just take it slow unless SHE wants to speed it up. Most women will let you knopw, but some will not. Just always treat them with respect and never talk about ur ex's unless She ask. Even then, don't bad mouth them bc She will be thinking that you will do the same with her. Each woman is differant as far as 1st dates go. I've had the best luck at keeping it light and asking her opinions. You might give you an idea. Best of luck.
KevinMcy wrote :
So. There's this girl I met. The first time she called me I think we ended up talking for 3-3.5hrs. Ever since that first phone call we've been texting each other like crazy and we'll usually talk on the phone for 1.5-3hrs. It's pretty insane, I'm not sure if I've ever felt this strongly for someone. I for sure haven't ever developed these feelings for anyone over such a short amount of time. I know she likes me...she tells me she can't stop thinking about me and I feel the same way about her. We've been doing the whole text/phone thing for about 2 weeks (she's a 4.5hr drive away which I would've made in a heartbeat if she hadn't gone on a family vacation). We're meeting this weekend for a lunch date and I get the feeling that she's expecting something really romantic. Does anyone out there have an idea of anything romantic I could do without scaring her off?

Right now I'm thinking about asking her to go on a short walk with me after lunch and going over to a flower shop/stand where I'd have preordered a couple flowers (I'm thinking blue/white tulips because they're her favorite colors--I know stargazers are her favorite flowers but I think it might be a little too much).

Any help? I really really really REALLY like this girl and I think she might like me too...I want to sweep her off her feet but I'm worried about what's appropriate for a first encounter.
 
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Sparkles56 is offline Sparkles56 Post #18  March 26,2011, 12:40pm
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Davidnellas wrote :
Just take it slow unless SHE wants to speed it up. Most women will let you knopw, but some will not. Just always treat them with respect...
This is a really tricky path to navigate... because in some cases, if you take it slow, then another guy who isn't taking it slow will capture her attention. But if you move too fast, that could backfire as well. But David is completely right in that you always treat them with respect...
 
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A4CG is offline A4CG Post #19  March 29,2011, 5:37pm
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I say be yourself! If you want to get her flowers then do so. However, don't hold it against her if she doesn't react the way you expect her to. Kudos to you for your romantic gesture.
 
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Murf is offline Murf Post #20  March 29,2011, 7:37pm
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paintandbooks wrote :
No feet-sweeping whatsoever! Kiss of death! Avoid at all costs!

And i'm not joking!

Back up (in your head and your emotions) and just treat this like any other meet n greet - just an opportunity, one among many, to meet someone new and see if the two of you hit it off.

Eat at a normal, comfortable place and be your normal, every day self, and don't sweat the small or the big stuff. Maybe it's a match, maybe not.

Good luck!
This is great advice. Speaking from one guy to another, you have to calm down. You don't want or need sweeping, dramatic gestures. You are doing your part. You are giving her your time and attention. Walk through an art museum. Walk through a shopping mall. If the conversation lags, you can point to something and start talking about something besides one another.

Good luck.
 
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