Dating Promiscuous Women


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jfish147 is offline jfish147 Post #1  December 25,2010, 7:18am
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I would like some opinions on this topic. Am I being too judgmental? Not giving a chance to potential great people?

I have this problem with breaking off dating once I find out a girl has slept with several people and this is why. I believe that her past is the best indication on how much she can be trusted. Promiscuous behavior is an indication that she folds under pressure, doesn't think of the future, and could have many vices. Sex to her is something she feels she is in control of, men appeasing her ego and most likely spending money on her. It's a very superficial struggle to satisfy emptiness.

I am now 28 and I have only been with 2 people and both were long relationships where we didn't sleep together for a few months (from initial date). I know the media and society tries to encourage us to sleep around and that it is a source of happiness. I don't like that view though because I still believe sex can be sacred between individuals and it is an expression of how you care for someone. Having sex with anyone attractive takes away this and lowers the value.

I appreciate the honesty many women have because they recognize it is something important to me, but what raises concern is many women I meet have the attitude of the girls from Sex and the City in that they are going to "have sex like men!" but those girls strike me as insecure and empty. I wonder why they do it. They get hurt by one man and then this? Well anyways, I am rambling...any opinions are welcome!
Last edited by eHA_Admin_Lori; December 25,2010 at 8:15pm. Reason: replaced masked obscenity with text in italics above
 
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lunabeach is offline lunabeach Post #2  December 25,2010, 7:30am
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I don't even know where to begin.

There is a vast difference between someone who has had several partners and someone who uses sex as a tool to boost ego, make money, or "satisfy emptiness."
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #3  December 25,2010, 7:30am

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stop asking women how many men they've slept with. it gives you no usable information on their character.
 
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FairOne is offline FairOne Post #4  December 25,2010, 7:37am
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If you view sex as sacred and want to date women that have the same view, that's reasonable. Do what you gotta do to screen for it.

But refrain from declaring that those who don't share your views on sex as sad, empty, shallow people. Not only is it not accurate, but it doesn't do anything to help you get closer to your goal.

You don't have to make others wrong so you can be right. Just do what you like minus the unnecessary judging.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #5  December 25,2010, 7:43am
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jfish147 wrote :
I would like some opinions on this topic. Am I being too judgmental? Not giving a chance to potential great people?

I have this problem with breaking off dating once I find out a girl has slept with several people and this is why. I believe that her past is the best indication on how much she can be trusted. Promiscuous behavior is an indication that she folds under pressure, doesn't think of the future, and could have many vices. Sex to her is something she feels she is in control of, men appeasing her ego and most likely spending money on her. It's a very superficial struggle to satisfy emptiness.

I am now 28 and I have only been with 2 people and both were long relationships where we didn't sleep together for a few months (from initial date). I know the media and society tries to encourage us to sleep around and that it is a source of happiness. I don't like that view though because I still believe sex can be sacred between individuals and it is an expression of how you care for someone. Having sex with anyone attractive takes away this and lowers the value.

I appreciate the honesty many women have because they recognize it is something important to me, but what raises concern is many women I meet have the attitude of the girls from Sex and the City in that they are going to "F*** like men!" but those girls strike me as insecure and empty. I wonder why they do it. They get hurt by one man and then this? Well anyways, I am rambling...any opinions are welcome!
" I believe that her past is the best indication on how much she can be trusted." - you think that a girl who has had more sexual partners is more likely to be untrustworthy? A cheating type?

"Promiscuous behavior is an indication that she folds under pressure, doesn't think of the future.."
- there is just so much zero logic in your comments that it sounds somewhat bigoted.

Surely the more sex she's had the more likely she'll be experienced and that will be to your benefit - if you can forgive her for taking a different path to the one you took.

In terms of dating advice I would advise until your view changes to only date virgins. This will be your utopia.
Last edited by SteveManchesterEngland; December 25,2010 at 7:47am.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #6  December 25,2010, 7:56am

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i'm really calm about this because i'm waiting for the ativan to kick in before i have to go to my mother's.
 
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Special-K is offline Special-K Post #7  December 25,2010, 8:03am
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Instead of judging the actions of people for the choices they've made, value them as life lessons. The past is the past and can't be changed. Each of us has a past, some more interesting and colorful than others. It is past experience (good, bad and ugly) that make us who we are. Get to know the women you meet and leave their pasts where they belong. After all, you're not perfect...
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #8  December 25,2010, 8:06am
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the original comment is not the view point of any men I know.
 
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SteveManchesterEngland is offline SteveManchesterEngland Post #9  December 25,2010, 8:08am
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scarlet13 wrote :
i don't mind those types. there are are very few really good ones anyway- i can apprieciate a good, creative, under the bridge dweller.

i don't think this is one, though. we've had the same topic come up before.
I don't think it matters about someone's history. When I meet someone, it's who they are now that counts.
 
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annother is offline annother Post #10  December 25,2010, 8:18am
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If anyone of either gender is having a lot of one night stands and/or very brief relationships they are not sufficiently experienced in sustaining a relationship to be of interest to me. Keeping a romance vibrant is a learned art.

Edit: Forgot to say that having had multiple partners is neither a good thing nor a bad thing. It just is.
Last edited by annother; December 25,2010 at 12:26pm.
 
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