Special-K is offline Special-K Post #1  December 20,2010, 6:07am
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... gotten in one person everything you want, without compromising anything? If so, what was it like and how long did it last? Did you decide later that there were other things about that "perfect" person that you didn't like; things you hadn't considered before?

I've never dated a guy who fit my perfect mold; I've always had to compromise something(s). That said, I don't regret letting any of those guys into my life. They all brought something of value; taught me something about myself and relationships.

So, if you're like me and haven't gotten everything you thought you were looking for, do you hold out? Or, like me, did you find the compromise was worth the concession?
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #2  December 20,2010, 6:14am

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i did.

it didn't last/move forward because we had one glaring dealbreaker that neither of us are willing to compromise on. (children)

we are sort of still seeing each other. it's complicated.
 
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suzyblueeyes is offline suzyblueeyes Post #3  December 20,2010, 6:21am
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I would say that my boyfriend almost fits my perfect mold. I don't have to compromise on anything that I consider important. That being said, I am not under the illusion that means he is perfect. He has his flaws. However, overall, he is everything I was looking for in a man. It makes it very easy to overlook the times he leaves the toilet seat up or is anxious when he can't get ahold of me.

I found him only a few months after firmly telling myself that I was not going to compromise anymore. My standards are fair and reasonable, things that I live up to myself, although maybe not all that common to find. They are based on morals and values and not at all on things I consider silly (such as money, looks, and social status).
 
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LaTrish is offline LaTrish Post #4  December 20,2010, 6:21am
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Special-K wrote :
So, if you're like me and haven't gotten everything you thought you were looking for, do you hold out? Or, like me, did you find the compromise was worth the concession?

Everyone should have the a list of wants and needs from their mate. Wants should be the things that you can live without, and/or are willing to compromise. The needs on the other hand should be non-negotiable. And the bar shouldn't be set so high, that no one would ever be able to fit that mold. No one is the same. Every one has their own set of issues and baggage that they come with. That's a given. And you judge those things accordingly. When it comes to your needs, and the list should not be so long that you immediately rule out anyone after they fail to meet the first five. The beauty of dating is that it's all about getting to know people. And you do learn about yourself in the process.
 
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Singlencooking is offline Singlencooking Post #5  December 20,2010, 6:37am
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Having one big deal-breaker means that you do not have "everything you want, without compromising anything"

scarlet13 wrote :
i did.

it didn't last/move forward because we had one glaring dealbreaker that neither of us are willing to compromise on. (children)

we are sort of still seeing each other. it's complicated.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #6  December 20,2010, 6:38am

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Singlencooking wrote :
Having one big deal-breaker means that you do not have "everything you want, without compromising anything"
yes. neither compromised. that's why.
 
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Singlencooking is offline Singlencooking Post #7  December 20,2010, 6:40am
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I do not think this is the scenario OP was talking about.

scarlet13 wrote :
yes. neither compromised. that's why.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #8  December 20,2010, 6:44am

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Singlencooking wrote :
I do not think this is the scenario OP was talking about.
well, report my post to the off topic police then if you disagree.

please stop threadjacking SpecialK's thread with your petty arguments with me. thank you.
 
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Singlencooking is offline Singlencooking Post #9  December 20,2010, 6:48am
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You can become as bitter as you like, it does not bother me.

Anyone else reading the OP will understand that when the OP says "everything you want, without compromising anything" they essentially are referring to a perfect scenario and not where a person was able to ignore big
deal-breakers and still continue.

About reporting your post - I will not need your permission to do it.


scarlet13 wrote :
well, report my post to the off topic police then if you disagree.

please stop threadjacking SpecialK's thread with your petty arguments with me. thank you.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #10  December 20,2010, 7:49am
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I am not sure that I am qualified to answer your question but I have found three girls that I felt were a very good fit for me. The longest that any of these relationships lasted was about 2 1/2 months. In every case the girl ended it.
 
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