PenguinOne is offline PenguinOne Post #1  November 29,2010, 5:19pm
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Between eH, LL and POF I'm "celebrating" eleven months of online dating... by zapping all the accounts and never looking back.

I concluded that online dating may just not be my thing but it was a great learning and discovery process and I wonder if others are in the same position.

I realized some time in that I wasn't really attracted to well... anyone really. All the profiles started to look and read the same and pictures generated as many sparks as water and wood rubbed together. For me the attraction comes from who the person is before the physical elements come into play. The only problem I discovered is that everyone I ran into wanted to feel the heat in the first two dates, but it takes quite a bit of time to get to know someone and even longer if it’s in canned events. I'm sure it's safe to say that this doesn't apply to everyone but it did in my sampling.

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PenguinOne is offline PenguinOne Post #2  November 29,2010, 5:19pm
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I eventually realized I was putting way to many resources into online activities, writing several paragraph introduction messages only to get silence in return, or a one liner response.

Regardless of how much space you are given it's impossible to put yourself to paper and even if you could and everything was what the person was looking for it comes down to the execution which can vary wildly. At the end of the day it really does come down to the picture.

So I'm doing what I probably should have been doing all this time. Filling my schedule with as much as possible as I did last year. I know that some people swear by online dating but I think that it may cater to some personality types more than others.
 
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littlebluemonkeymind is offline littlebluemonkeymind Post #3  November 29,2010, 5:34pm
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You're absolutely right - it isn't for everyone and I think the things that frustrated you are issues for everyone...but if it's not working and you meet people IRL, that's a great option, too.

I hope you find someone who makes you smile. Good luck.
 
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epee03 is offline epee03 Post #4  November 29,2010, 6:40pm
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have you tried actual match making services??
 
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FaintestInkling is offline FaintestInkling Post #5  November 29,2010, 6:46pm
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I think online dating is really probably best for people who, due to environmental factors (such as very tight schedules or living in an area without many people in appropriate demographics) are unlikely to meet people in real life at a reasonabe rate.

I wouldn't have ever bothered with online dating if I thought I stood a better chance IRL, but the way things are, I meet a "new woman" within 5 years of my age who isn't a conflict of interest to date, at best, every couple of weeks, maybe even months, so what are the odds of that person being suitable for a relationship?

I don't really think this whole "pick out someone who is ideal for your personality" or "be matched with someone ideal through the 29 dimensions" happens at all ....

Just a way to (maybe) meet people, if you're lucky, and if other options aren't working very well.
 
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wonkymonky is offline wonkymonky Post #6  November 29,2010, 7:38pm
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Hi PenguinOne,

You're definitely not the only one who share the same views. It seems that you have two milliseconds to make an impression and then people know everything about you.

I don't buy the eH approach also because at the end of the day, some people will fill it out truthfully, others will tell you who they think they are but not really who they are, and others will tell you what they think you want to hear.

I find it's best to treat the entire medium as just another way to get introduced to people.

Good luck ...
Last edited by wonkymonky; November 29,2010 at 8:51pm.
 
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