Met online, hung out, now what?

Dear RedVelvet312,

Welcome to eHarmony Advice (eHA) and thanks for posting.

Glad you had a nice first date.

To answer your question, wait for him to contact you. I know it's hard, but if he wants to contact you, he will. He knows your number.

Don't be too eager and don't drive yourself crazy wondering why he hasn't contacted you since the date.

None of us know why; however, what you need to be doing is living your life each day to the fullest and not be waiting for him to call, text, or email.

That way, if he does contact you again, it won't be like you've been sitting around just waiting on him. You'll be full of things you've been doing to share with him instead which is more desirable to a match rather than a person who depends on another person to do things and / or for their happiness.

You cannot put your life on hold for another person - not that you're doing so, but do keep that in mind.

Be so busy that you're not really noticing he hasn't contacted you. You've only had one date. Your impression of how it went may differ greatly from his - even though it did seem to go well and he said good things to you. Lots of time, people, after meeting their match and having some think time afterward to mull things over, aren't interested in continuing. We don't know if that's the case or not yet. That's why patience is such a virtue. You'll know soon enough.

You only have to read these boards of people who were so emotionally invested after one date it was very hard for them when the person poofed (never contacted them again).

We don't know what will happen - though I do hope he contacts you again. Don't live your life like he will though - is the principle.

Guard your heart. Keep you emotions in check. Don't expect too much. Keep your expectations low - that way you will not be disappointed or so disappointed.

This behavior you're experiencing is much more common than a person would think. It has happened to many people here.

Again, this man may contact you. You'll need to wait and see if he does. If he does, don't mention the wait or your wondering or things like that or show signs of insecurity.

Things tend to work better when the man is the primary pursuer of the woman. If you all get established and develop a relationship, then some, but not more than he does, reciprocal contact is nice.

The principle here is: "Do not pursue a man more than he is pursuing you."

Another way to put it: "Pace, not chase."

Wishing you well and write and let us know what happens.

JavaJava5