3 Steps To Stop A Man From Withdrawing

3 Steps To Stop A Man From Withdrawing

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3 Steps To Stop A Man From Withdrawing


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TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #41  March 29,2011, 1:53pm
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mitchell175 wrote :
John Gray has a section about this in his book "Mars and Venus On A Date", about "men as rubber bands". I used to be a "chaser", trying to "close the space" between us, but then I tried the concept of "letting him snap back" - and it works! Men sometimes need their space (women too). He knows where you are when he is ready to snap back.
I love that! I gave the man his space. I ddn't hound him about telling me what was wrong. I just left him alone. He totally snapped back...and he was even more loving than before.
 
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paisleynposies is offline paisleynposies Post #42  April 8,2011, 8:23am
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This article should be titled "How to be a manipulative doormat for a man who treats you badly and doesn't trust you"[/QUOTE]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who had a problem with this.
 
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Alwzangll is offline Alwzangll Post #43  April 8,2011, 8:52am
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 When a guy would withdraw from me in the past, I would want to address it, but now I back off. Its pretty much the same result though, or maybe even worse. The last time I felt a guy withdraw, I gave him space and he randomly texted me saying "well since I haven't heard from you, I guess this is adios". He later apologized and then ignored me. So I let him go and haven't talked to him since.  This was after calls and texts and compliments, great dates, etc. All of a sudden he did a 180 and I've been there before. Now I figure its better to let them go early than to keep holding on and be in the same position a year later as when you started out together. But, this guy certainly did not appreciate me giving him space. So, now I've just taken a break from dating since there seems to be no good solution.   
 
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Alwzangll is offline Alwzangll Post #44  April 8,2011, 8:57am
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Its good to hear I'm not alone in this. I have the same thing. It usually has a lifespan of about 4 dates, just at the time I start to really like him and feel more comfortable. It starts out with lots of attention, daily texts or calls, compliments, and statements of how glad they are to have finally found someone like me. How they like that I'm intelligent and have a career, I was even told it was sexy I was stubborn and was honest and told the truth.

Then all of a sudden....nothing! I use to react emotionally, not I really don't do much of anything. I figure let them go.
 
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KikiAZ is offline KikiAZ Post #45  April 8,2011, 4:45pm
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It's normal that you (he) has doubts. It's normal for there to be a mini-time out while he assesses whether or not a new relationship works for him/well enough for him (or to get equilibrium if his work situation has been crazy). For a guy, it's normal to want to do this alone or to go back to his guy friends to see what that was all about, was it really "so great as I kind of remember'd it being." Women, eh, we just obsess with our friends...then everyone votes.

I agree with the letting him do his thing while entertaining yourself and not giving off "you're in trouble, mister" vibes.

That said. It dang well better not be a month.
 
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