crystal01b is offline crystal01b Post #1  October 10,2010, 8:38pm
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I think I may have come on too strong with a guy I just recently met.. We had a date on Friday night and it went really well. We didn't see each other the next day because we both had plans but we hung out again on Sunday. After Sunday we hung out again on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday of that week. Tuesday and Wednesday I stayed over at his place but it didn't go any further than just sleeping. It seemed like we both were really enjoying the time we spent together. He would have me text him when I got home at night to make sure I made it home safely, etc. He would tell me he had a wonderful time all that stuff. After Thursday night though there was no text back at night no good morning text. I didn't see him on Friday and just saw him again today. Today was awkward though he was distant. He didn't want to give me a good bye kiss or hug and when I asked him why he said he just didn't right now. He also said that we should just see where it goes and that he i used to being by himself and not having someone around all the time. I think I came on too strong for him. I really like him and do want to see where it might go but now it seems like he won't text me, etc. What can I do to fix this? Thank you!
 
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Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  October 10,2010, 8:45pm
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I would back off and give him some space. That's what he's saying he wants. So -- let him be the next one to make contact. Or at least let a couple days go by before contacting him.

It's possible he's lost interest, but it's also possible he just can't take as much contact as you've been having.

It's also possible you're not a good fit for each other -- perhaps you're a high-contact person and he's a mid or low- contact person. That can be negotiated but it's pretty hard.
 
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robv_la is offline robv_la Post #3  October 10,2010, 9:03pm
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He was enjoying being with you and got swept up in the emotions of it all too...then he finally got a chance to come up for air when you didn't see other. Now I would guess he's afraid he's jumping into something too quickly.

Tell him you understand, that all this is new to you and that you feel it's important that you both don't rush into anything. Then say, why don't we talk about this again next week?

Don't chase. Don't pressure. Give him space...and allow him time to contact you back...wait for him to contact you back.

This is not game playing...this is...if you set someone free and they come back, they are yours...if not they never were.
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #4  October 11,2010, 1:53am
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Agree with statement below. Too much, too soon.
"Just sleeping" or not don't stay over his house. You were crowding him. Take a deep breath and relax, just avoid smothering him like that next time.
robv_la wrote :
He was enjoying being with you and got swept up in the emotions of it all too...then he finally got a chance to come up for air when you didn't see other. Now I would guess he's afraid he's jumping into something too quickly.
Don't chase. Don't pressure. Give him space...and allow him time to contact you back...wait for him to contact you back.
 
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crystal01b is offline crystal01b Post #5  October 11,2010, 1:58am
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Thank you all for your advice so far. It gives me hope that there is still a possibility!
 
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mdchica is offline mdchica Post #6  November 4,2010, 11:11am
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crystal01b wrote :
Thank you all for your advice so far. It gives me hope that there is still a possibility!
Just curious as to where things are now...
 
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