Emme0264 is offline Emme0264 Post #1  September 30,2010, 4:56pm
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Just curious about what others think the odds are in this situation in which I find myself. Keep in mind that I have not stopped dating or living because of this issue. I may even have posted it before, in which case I'm sorry and this post should be deleted. I'll keep it very short.

Had an amazing first date with this guy. Laughed ourselves silly, work in the same industry so understand each other's lingo and shorthand, have a ton in common, etc. Over the next week or so he pursued me relentlessly with tons of texts, emails and phone calls. He then tells me his ex, who divorced him because she was in love with and got engaged to another guy, wanted to give their relationship another try. This discussion took place when they dropped their only son off at college several states away.

He and I are still platonically, sporadically in touch. I'm just curious what people think the odds are that his relationship with his now ex will work out or if the odds are against them. I was disappointed that we didn't get to explore further what was clearly between us, but I'm still out here dating and not pining away. It was only one date, albeit the best first date I've ever had.

And now that I post this, I think I did post something about this before. Still, any thoughts?
 
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cp30 is offline cp30 Post #2  September 30,2010, 4:57pm

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you did post about it before...quite awhile ago. Still no word on what he's doing with the ex?
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #3  September 30,2010, 5:02pm
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Personally, I think the odds it will work out with the ex are relatively small (maybe one-quarter?)

I also think this is unadvised for other reasons:

- He is too close to a prior partner.

- He pursues excessively, which is unhealthy and an impulse-control problem.
 
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Ingytravel is offline Ingytravel Post #4  September 30,2010, 5:03pm
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I did read your other post...

The point to remember is that it might have been the best date ever for you...sadly, it wasn't for him since he dropped you very quickly to get back with his ex...sorry to be blunt...but that is what I got from the story..

So..I wouldn't worry to much about their odds...if you actually like him as a person..then hope that he is happy and move on with your life with someone who actually thinks that YOU are the best thing that has happened to them..

We all want/deserve that
 
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annother is offline annother Post #5  September 30,2010, 5:10pm
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I think most people would give a long-term relationship (especially one that included children) a second chance. The likelihood that the reunion will succeed will depend on how long it takes the couple to revert to their previous behaviours.

In my limited experience, there is a brief second honeymoon, followed by a period of domesticity which devolves into a relationship just like the one that previously broke up.
 
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howardtheduck is offline howardtheduck Post #6  September 30,2010, 5:12pm
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7:3 that it works out... That's what I give
 
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ISearch4Love is offline ISearch4Love Post #7  September 30,2010, 6:15pm
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howardtheduck wrote :
7:3 that it works out... That's what I give
Did ya pull that out of the blue or did ya use some sort of logic? LOL
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #8  September 30,2010, 6:38pm
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Well, I'll pull something out of the blue.

He'll dump you and get back with his ex-wife, but it won't work out in the long run.
 
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lada2 is offline lada2 Post #9  September 30,2010, 6:44pm
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the odds aren't good, and the goods sound odd.
the kid is gonna need to move back in with someone after college; do you want it to be you??
 
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Special-K is offline Special-K Post #10  September 30,2010, 7:13pm
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Emme0264 wrote :
Just curious about what others think the odds are in this situation in which I find myself. Keep in mind that I have not stopped dating or living because of this issue. I may even have posted it before, in which case I'm sorry and this post should be deleted. I'll keep it very short.

Had an amazing first date with this guy. Laughed ourselves silly, work in the same industry so understand each other's lingo and shorthand, have a ton in common, etc. Over the next week or so he pursued me relentlessly with tons of texts, emails and phone calls. He then tells me his ex, who divorced him because she was in love with and got engaged to another guy, wanted to give their relationship another try. This discussion took place when they dropped their only son off at college several states away.

He and I are still platonically, sporadically in touch. I'm just curious what people think the odds are that his relationship with his now ex will work out or if the odds are against them. I was disappointed that we didn't get to explore further what was clearly between us, but I'm still out here dating and not pining away. It was only one date, albeit the best first date I've ever had.

And now that I post this, I think I did post something about this before. Still, any thoughts?
The odds that this will work are slim; however, that is irrelevant to your situation. Even if they don't make it, he has issues that need to be worked through before he will be available to start a new relationship w/ someone else.
 
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