What does "dating" mean?


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adidas1six is offline adidas1six Post #1  September 27,2010, 9:14pm
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Is it understood that when you meet someone on here that they are "dating" and therefore probably hanging out with other people as well? Or do you have to say that up front? Or is it lying if you dont?
 
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WA_hiker is offline WA_hiker Post #2  September 27,2010, 9:19pm
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Not exactly sure what you mean. I think you are asking if multi-dating (dating several different people at once) is okay. In general, it seems to be considered socially acceptable until people "establish exclusivity" in a relationship.

However, different people have different ideas about this. Personally, I think dating more than one person at a time is weird and I would be uncomfortable in that situation. Then again, most of the time I am dating zero people and am not particularly happy with that either haha. Just go with what you feel more comfortable with.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #3  September 27,2010, 9:21pm
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When initially meeting someone on an on-line dating site, it's a mistake to assume anything. At some point early on I always asked, which usually prompted them to ask the same thing.

And no, it's not lying if you don't offer up the info voluntarily without being asked.
 
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adidas1six is offline adidas1six Post #4  September 27,2010, 9:26pm
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Ok well maybe I should clarify a bit more...if you meet someone on here and agree to meet up - is that a date or hanging out? And if it is a date, is that ok to be going on dates with a few different people throughout the month that you met from the site?
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #5  September 27,2010, 9:32pm
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adidas1six wrote :
Ok well maybe I should clarify a bit more...if you meet someone on here and agree to meet up - is that a date or hanging out?

It may be a considered a date if it lasts a couple hours.

And if it is a date, is that ok to be going on dates with a few different people throughout the month that you met from the site?

Yes
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Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #6  September 28,2010, 3:52am
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Until the exclusivity talk happens, it seems to be acceptable to date multiple people.

We are all looking for a partner and it takes time and effort to find that particular person. If we were to not date anyone else the moment we started to date one person, the process would be much longer than it is right now. For me It has been a few years already, and years do not simply stop because we are looking and looking.

So go ahead and date multiple people When I have a date or a first meeting, I know that the other person is most probably dating other people.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #7  September 28,2010, 4:32am
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When I see someone struggling with hair-splitting semantics. I see someone who wants to justify something and still be honest .
adidas1six wrote :
Ok well maybe I should clarify a bit more...if you meet someone on here and agree to meet up - is that a date or hanging out? And if it is a date, is that ok to be going on dates with a few different people throughout the month that you met from the site?
 
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StPaulGirl is offline StPaulGirl Post #8  September 28,2010, 5:15am
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I don't participate in eH (or similar) to meet friends. Therefore, I consider social engagements with men I meet through these services to be dates.

I do not feel any dissonance about dating several men I've met online concurrently, and I assume they are also dating other women. If I desired for a man I met through eH to no longer see other women, I would talk to him about it and be prepared to stop seeing other men and stop engaging new matches in conversation as well.

As an aside, I'd like to strike the term "hanging out" from the English language. I hate it so much.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #9  September 28,2010, 5:22am
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StPaulGirl wrote :
As an aside, I'd like to strike the term "hanging out" from the English language. I hate it so much.
Yeah. It sounds like someone left their zipper down.
 
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TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #10  September 28,2010, 5:22am
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adidas1six wrote :
Ok well maybe I should clarify a bit more...if you meet someone on here and agree to meet up - is that a date or hanging out?
I don't consider the first time you meet someone a date, most of my first meetings are quick little get togethers, to determine that person is who they say they are.

Hanging out.. is something I do with my friends, and not a term I prefer to use when pursuing someone.

wrote :
[And if it is a date, is that ok to be going on dates with a few different people throughout the month that you met from the site?
Everyone has a different view on this, you have to decide what you are comfortable with. I think there is a huge difference in seeing someone a few times and multi-dating for an extended period.
Last edited by TrekRyder10; September 28,2010 at 5:26am.
 
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