Do I, should I call back ?


Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #1  September 24,2010, 5:12am
Goomph's Avatar

is boldly going where he has never gone before.

Volunteer Community Leader

Joined: Aug 2008

Ontario

Posts: 1,240

See profile

Recently I found a match on EH. We started with a sparodic EH communication, with mostly me doing the mailing. Even though I really liked her profile, I was pretty sure that we were not goin anywhere but I kept at it.

Yesterday she called me, and we talked close to an hour, which was very pleasant. (Yes I had given her my number as she asked for it).

Now that she called me, is it ok if I called her back ? Her number is on my call display. But she did not mention that I can/should call her while we were talking or in her mails.

Am I expected to call back and if I do not call her will it show a lack of interest ? Maybe I should txt her first and ask if it is ok if I called her and if she has time ? Or should I just wait for her to call me again, to see if she has decided to give it a try ?

I should state that I said I would be looking forward to hearing back from her again before hanging up and saying bye....

Soooo, what is your advice ?
 
  Reply With Quote
primarilyconfused is offline primarilyconfused Post #2  September 24,2010, 5:17am
primarilyconf…'s Avatar

is enjoying the ride

Enthusiast

Joined: Jun 2010

probably in a cave

Posts: 652

See profile

I like the idea of a text asking her about a phone call and if/when would be a good time to reach her.
 
  Reply With Quote
TrekRyder10 is offline TrekRyder10 Post #3  September 24,2010, 5:18am
TrekRyder10's Avatar

Virtuoso

Joined: Jan 2010

In a van down by the river

Posts: 4,802

See profile

Do not text her to ask if its okay to call....just call!
Last edited by TrekRyder10; September 24,2010 at 5:26am.
 
  Reply With Quote
wheel_on_fire is offline wheel_on_fire Post #4  September 24,2010, 5:23am
wheel_on_fire's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Mar 2010

Southeast US

Posts: 31

See profile

In my experience, the "mother may I?," stuff comes across as insecure, indecisive, and in general very unattractive. I would advise you to decide what you think is the best way to proceed and just pull the trigger. Confidence comes across much more positively than trying to split hairs about the best way to get in touch again imo.
 
  Reply With Quote
DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #5  September 24,2010, 5:28am
DancingFool's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Jan 2009

Posts: 5,750

See profile

Yes, you need to pick up the phone and call her. Also, you need to ask her on a date. Do not txt and do not drag your feet. There is no greater turn off than a man who is insecure and wishy washy.
 
  Reply With Quote
Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #6  September 24,2010, 5:34am
Goomph's Avatar

is boldly going where he has never gone before.

Volunteer Community Leader

Joined: Aug 2008

Ontario

Posts: 1,240

See profile

This is why I love the advice forums, you guys lay it down in a nice and easy to understand way, pointing out the angles one usually misses.

I would have never thought that I would be seen as wish/washy/insecure or submissive, I was only seeing it as being polite. Maybe I am too polite for the times we are in

I will give her a call tomorrow and ask her out. Thanks folks !
 
  Reply With Quote
Goomph is offline Goomph — Advice Member-Moderator Post #7  September 24,2010, 5:35am
Goomph's Avatar

is boldly going where he has never gone before.

Volunteer Community Leader

Joined: Aug 2008

Ontario

Posts: 1,240

See profile

Oh boy, I replied and I got modded I wonder what I typed Waiting for the slap on the wrists now LOL
 
  Reply With Quote
StPaulGirl is offline StPaulGirl Post #8  September 24,2010, 5:41am
StPaulGirl's Avatar

Enthusiast

Joined: Aug 2010

Posts: 578

See profile

Call her, and ask for a date. Use the word date.

Alternately, call her, and say that you're interested in dating her but that her level of engagement makes you wonder if she's interested or not. If she evades the question, she's not interested.

Right now you have very little emotionally wrapped up in this woman (I hope) so now is the time to find out if you're wasting your time.
 
  Reply With Quote
Alli824 is offline Alli824 — Advice Member-Moderator Post #9  September 24,2010, 5:52am
Alli824's Avatar

thinks common sense is a gift and intelligence something one is gifted with!

Volunteer Community Leader

Joined: Nov 2007

Fort Lauderdale

Posts: 1,262

See profile

If the exchange was a pleasant one, pick up the phone and call her. She initiated the first contact now it's your turn.
 
  Reply With Quote
scully98 is offline scully98 Post #10  September 24,2010, 6:05am
scully98's Avatar

like a cowgirl!

Virtuoso

Joined: Jun 2010

Posts: 3,063

See profile

yes, pick up the phone and call her. I will suggest that don't just go straight into a big monologue when you call - give her a chance to opt for the conversation another time if she's busy at work/etc. you just never know what someone is doing when you call, so it's polite to say, "Hi, this is John, just wanted to call and say hi, and see if you wanted to go out on a date next Friday night! Is now a good time to talk or should I call you back?"

That way, you've stated your purpose, you've been decisive (which women adore) and you've given her a chance to let you know if she can't talk at that exact moment.

Make the call!
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3


« I am probably reading too much into this but... | Dating | breaking a dating hiatus. scared spitless. »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Secure call is worthless to buy passat1 Using eHarmony 13 February 3,2011 11:24am
Why don't they call? christina72800 Using eHarmony 27 February 1,2011 7:53pm
Communication amount? when not hearing back? pntball Using eHarmony 13 September 25,2010 10:57am
I only know he lied because I snooped... needtolearn Relationships 43 September 18,2010 12:26am
I didn't feel ready to kiss on the 1st date--Will he call back for a 2nd? oceanlady Dating 67 April 16,2010 10:02am

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“I did answer and then also updated with news that I was premature - there is no relationship after all.” –  picklesNcream

Join the “Blast off...!” discussion

“For dating. I'm basically in a (lifelong) rut that I would like to get out of. Sadly, my good friends are also in the same place as I am - if not worse. The topic of women is non existent among ... ” –  JohnNorthSydney

Join the “So I've been thinking about getting a coach.” discussion

“I need some advice. I'm 18, never kissed/dated a girl nor obviously had a girlfriend. I just finished my first year at a top 30 university (full ride scholarship) with a 4.0 GPA. Starting my ... ” –  jrw93

Join the “Should I ever date in college?” discussion

“The point is no me seeing their photos, I can see their photos; it is them seeing my photos. This means nothing can be gauged by any interest they show to you. On FCW I've noticed the non-paying ... ” –  JohnNorthSydney

Join the “Free Communication Weekend” discussion

“TD, Have you PM'd eH_Advice_Host_Eve to ask her for help? She is good at helping people tweak their settings so they are more likely to get the results they want. Please consider contacting her if ... ” –  tink333

Join the “Different Strategy” discussion

“Did you know OT stands for on topic and off topic?” –  Bluskies4ever3

Join the “Off -Topic” discussion

“My inner child says I am. Anastasia is intriguing. (Her name too). I like the dress she's wearing in the ad. I wonder how eHarmony picks the couples for their print and TV ads.” –  Bluskies4ever3

Join the “Where is Becky?!?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 3:53am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0