Do Political and Social Views Affect Our Choices in Who We Date?


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heisenberg is offline heisenberg Post #61  August 1,2010, 6:34am
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melman wrote :
You're crossing the line toward a personal attack on many of the readers of this thread. Please watch your language and be respectful of others' points of view.
Agree with this...

Even if I did agree with someones point of view on a particular issue, and I have yet to fully agree with anyone's philosophies on all issues, I would close out anyone who would arbitrarily characterize a differing point of view as "stupid".

Beyond that, I have seen posts that sent clear messages about political preferences that I have closed. Not for the preference itself, but rather the method in which it was conveyed, if it hinted of intolerance.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #62  August 1,2010, 8:32am
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heisenberg wrote :
Agree with this...

Even if I did agree with someones point of view on a particular issue, and I have yet to fully agree with anyone's philosophies on all issues, I would close out anyone who would arbitrarily characterize a differing point of view as "stupid".

Beyond that, I have seen posts that sent clear messages about political preferences that I have closed. Not for the preference itself, but rather the method in which it was conveyed, if it hinted of intolerance.
This ^
 
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deegoesgreen is offline deegoesgreen Post #63  August 1,2010, 8:38am
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ami1uwant wrote :
What happens more often on first dates is people do talk about some of this stuff but on a higher level and lacking in detail or nuances. Someone might say they were raised catholic but that doesnt address what their view are on items like abortion, sex before marriage, or they believe in corporal punishment.

They talk about wanting to have kids but not much on how they will be raised.

They will talk about family values but only the ones that 75% of the population agrees on.

In general many who date are only focused on sex, attraction and "fun" and not much else.

I have said this before..sex to early in a relationship is a killer in the long run because you enjoy the sex and ignore who the person is either because you dont want to get into a fight and lose that person or you are so infantuated that you forget who the person is and what they are saying. You only realize this years later after you discover what s/he is really like and what their values really are.

Its not that you two grown apart (unless you were 18-22 when you got married) but you ignored warning signs from earlier or didnt ask the right questions.
I agree with this ^^^^.

My late hubs and I didn't talk about politics. Few of the options mentioned here were important to us, but that was a long time ago. We weren't worldly and mature when we met/married.
In my last relationship, politics and values popped up along the way. It didn't start off as a critical aspect to our compatibility. When the JJ/SB scandal blew up, I had a rude awakening to the guy's way of thinking. He adores JJ and quipped that JJ was too good for SB anyway.
So while core values, political beliefs and such haven't been high on my radar for what makes a partner compatible, I'm certainly more aware of how those can either enhance or taint a potential relationship. Especially the core values. I always lumped it into must have integrity, compassion, empathy, etc. Then I'd observe actions that illustrated those values. Now I guess I should be more proactive or discerning.
Good topic.
 
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deegoesgreen is offline deegoesgreen Post #64  August 1,2010, 8:42am
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I meant to add this:
I detest hypocrisy and those who are entrenched in believing their view is the only view, and they are always right. I am a moderate/independent person, with an open mind, with a bent towards some conservative values. I would not mesh with a guy who's rabidly one-sided in his view of the world.
 
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Ephemera is offline Ephemera Post #65  August 1,2010, 8:58am
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There are some views that are just plain right. No matter how you want to try and justify it you are wrong if you are trying to limit human rights. I agree that there are certain tricky spots here; such as abortion and the rights of woman vs fetus. However it seems crystal clear that sexual orientation is not a qualifier for whether you are a human and deserve the same rights as other humans. Ethnicity is another such matter. Anybody that feels that human rights are only for some humans would not be someone that I would view as intellegent or compassionate enough to want to have as a friend or as a date. I do not use the word stupid as that implies an inability to progress mentally and I have witnessed the change of mind that occurs to formerly bigoted people when a child of theirs is gay or they get to know someone from a race they had been biased against and become friends. Progress is possible but I am no longer at a stage of my life where I want to be engaged in the constant struggle with a partner over human rights issues so I leave that up to others young and energetic enough to welcome the challenge.
 
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Spider is offline Spider Post #66  August 1,2010, 9:08am
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deegoesgreen wrote :
When the JJ/SB scandal blew up, I had a rude awakening to the guy's way of thinking. He adores JJ and quipped that JJ was too good for SB anyway.

JJ/SB = Janet Jackson and the Super Bowl thing?

I know I'm a bit out of the loop in terms of popular culture, but is that what you were talking about?
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #67  August 1,2010, 9:13am
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Spider wrote :
JJ/SB = Janet Jackson and the Super Bowl thing?

I know I'm a bit out of the loop in terms of popular culture, but is that what you were talking about?
I actually had to search for that one too!

Sandra Bullock & jesse james would be the reference.
 
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frogprince is offline frogprince Post #68  August 1,2010, 11:00am
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heisenberg wrote :
Agree with this...

Even if I did agree with someones point of view on a particular issue, and I have yet to fully agree with anyone's philosophies on all issues, I would close out anyone who would arbitrarily characterize a differing point of view as "stupid".

Beyond that, I have seen posts that sent clear messages about political preferences that I have closed. Not for the preference itself, but rather the method in which it was conveyed, if it hinted of intolerance.

To me being anti-gay marriage is like saying people in South Carolina shouldn't get married. Doesn't make sense to me.

As for the abortion thing I can see how people could think that life is worth saving and even before a baby is born they care about life so much that it affects them emotionally. But I would expect such a person to be anti-death penalty and a vegetarian as well. If they have the view for a legitimate reason of values I would respect that. If they are just repeating some political platform than I would not.

Really I don't care who you voted for in the election but I expect people to be considerate of other people. And not trying to interfere in other peoples lives by creating laws to keep them down.

I wouldn't date anyone that was a racist either. Or made fun of handicapped.

And I would never put my political views on issues on my profile.
 
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deegoesgreen is offline deegoesgreen Post #69  August 1,2010, 11:24am
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wrote :
Sandra Bullock & jesse james would be the reference.
Yep.
wrote :
To me being anti-gay marriage is like saying people in South Carolina shouldn't get married. Doesn't make sense to me.
Me either.
Well, except I know a few folks in this state that really shouldn't.
 
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Can_I_just_be_Jo is offline Can_I_just_be_Jo Post #70  August 1,2010, 11:27am

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melman wrote :
You're crossing the line toward a personal attack on many of the readers of this thread. Please watch your language and be respectful of others' points of view.
Or the poster was trying to show that not everyone seeks like minded people. Or they do, or not. Honestly that post made sense to you?
 
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