First date went well. Who follows up?


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morningsunlight is offline morningsunlight Post #21  July 24,2010, 5:46am
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I have no problem contacting a man. You had a good time and said to each other, "We'll keep in touch." If you want to be at least friends, why not at least say thank you and let's hang out again when both have time? Both of you have busy work. There are times when people are just too busy contacting someone new regardless of the level of interest.
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richey is offline richey Post #22  July 24,2010, 9:02am
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Honestly.. I have a different angle on this.

The last thing said was by you, saying "we'll be in touch." If it were me, I would take that as you plan on geting in touch with me, or that you were announcing you might be initiating the next contact. (because it coudl very easily be misheard, in those tense 1st date ending moments, and be misunderstood as "i'll be in touch" or "(I) will be in touch."

So this leads to why my advice is ALWAYS to do a follow-up to reinforce that you are interested, want to see them again, and thus NOT leave anything up to mis-interpreation and chance.

I definitely recommend you do a follow-up call or msg to "say hi.. catch up" and open that door again and say, "i had a great time and would like to do it again"...

Then you've done your part and it's up to him.

this is also why i think rules and games are ridiculous... because then the dating/relationship rpocess becomes more about the game, rather than just sticking to "do we get along and have fun and am i interested?"

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charmed59 is offline charmed59 Post #23  July 24,2010, 1:18pm
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EmergencyNurse wrote :
I haven't heard from him this week. I'm now on the fence re: my interest in him....on a scale from 1-10, I'd be a 5. I would, however, like to go out with him again and see if there's anything more there.
This is a great example for the guys who believe in the three day rule on why they should follow up immediately. At the beginning of the thread she was interested in him. Now that she hasn't heard from him, her interest wanes. That's what happens everywhere!!! Guys (and gals) if you want to see them again contact them early, the waiting 3 day thing is sooo 1964.
 
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EmergencyNurse is offline EmergencyNurse Post #24  July 27,2010, 5:45am
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Thanks, everyone, for your input. I called and left him a voice message yesterday morning. He promptly called me back within the hour! We have tentative plans to meet on Saturday. Even though I'm a strong advocate for the man to be confident and initiate plans, I don't necessarily have a problem contacting him....esp. in this day and at this age. We're all mature adults. But it's possible this guy didn't know where I stood with my interest towards him. Regardless, I find it OH SO flattering when the guy pursues :-).

At the very least, I can definitely see him as a friend if nothing more (even though, it's the "more" part I'm after as an active member of eHarmony ).
 
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