Can the horse be put back in the barn?


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TXButtercup is offline TXButtercup Post #1  July 1,2010, 9:49pm
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I've read a few threads across various boards about people who started dating someone, had sex very soon and then thought they had rushed things. In most of these cases the person simply poofs.

But it seems in at least a few of the cases, the other person doesn't, but the person originally concerned here on the boards still has concerns (like the other person is still seeing other people).

I had always figured once sex was introduced into a relationship, there wasn't really any going back, but maybe that isn't the case....

What do you think? Is it possible that the two people could have a conversation and set new boundaries (to wait until there is sexual exclusivity or a real relationship or whatever it was that made them think they rushed things)?

Just curious. I've wondered where a few of these ended up, but we don't usually hear back.
 
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illustrator is offline illustrator Post #2  July 1,2010, 10:25pm
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" Your barn door is open "
Last edited by illustrator; July 1,2010 at 10:25pm. Reason: ......" It's as big as a horse "
 
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illustrator is offline illustrator Post #3  July 1,2010, 10:37pm
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TXButtercup wrote :
I had always figured once sex was introduced into a relationship, there wasn't really any going back, but maybe that isn't the case....

What do you think? Is it possible that the two people could have a conversation and set new boundaries

Not impossible, but it would be like making someone sit in the kitchen while you baked cookies and never letting them have any.
 
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ThePriestess is offline ThePriestess Post #4  July 1,2010, 10:42pm
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illustrator wrote :
" Your barn door is open "
illustrator wrote :
"It's as big as a horse"
 
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illustrator is offline illustrator Post #5  July 1,2010, 11:14pm
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ThePriestess wrote :

So to answer the original question, maybe the horse won't fit back in the barn.
 
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ami1uwant is online now ami1uwant Post #6  July 1,2010, 11:32pm
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Catherine the great.....I am afraid not.

I believe you should talk of exclusivity before sex happens. Of course this could easily be straight lies on one side.

The bigger issue is that women have the emotional attachment to sex while men in general separate the act of sex to the emotions of love.

If you two head sex in the heat of the moment you can recoil it and jst say you wont again until this is exclusive.
 
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ThePriestess is offline ThePriestess Post #7  July 1,2010, 11:40pm
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illustrator wrote :
So to answer the original question, maybe the horse won't fit back in the barn.
Because the horse's backside is too big?
Last edited by ThePriestess; July 1,2010 at 11:49pm. Reason: What about a shuttle rocket?
 
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Johnnyguitarman is offline Johnnyguitarman Post #8  July 2,2010, 1:33am
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Once sex has occurred in a relationship ( and it is by definition now a sexual relationship) there is no going back. If one or the other person then decides to withold sex permanently then that is pretty much the end of the relationship. The two people are now at best "just friends".

It is a bit like these women who decide to become a "born again virgin".
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #9  July 2,2010, 3:01am

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I don't understand how it would benefit the relationship to withold sex after already having it, no matter the circumstances.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #10  July 2,2010, 3:27am
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Bolting the barn door after the horse is long gone is pointless.

So no, you can't take back the actions and you can't suddenly change things and say let's wait. What you can do is be an adult about it and discuss things with the person and come to an understanding on where you both stand and what your expectations and hopes are going forward in terms of a relationship. You may not hear what you want to hear, but....with actions come consequences.
 
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