To tell or not to tell....


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WayTooShyGirl is offline WayTooShyGirl Post #1  June 17,2010, 6:39pm
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Hey Everyone !

I need some advise on a current situation... I'm doing an nurse intership and my last day is next week.... I kinda put myself in an ackward situation by getting a crush on a new doctor i'm working with... (just to be clear: he's not so much my supervisor... but he is the affiliated doctor with my actual supervisor)

Anyways, the people at work threw me a going away party this week... I asked him if he wanted to come... He said yes and he actually came...though he was the only doctor there.. He started talking to the girl next to him and i felt so jalous ! After a while, i asked him something stupid and we started talking and the next thing we knew, we were left alone by everyone.... He talked... and i listened, very quietly... I thought i was sooooo boring, i wanted to shoot myself !!!!!! I had the chance to get some alone time with him but i blew it ! After 30 minutes, he realized he had a patient, got off his chair and just said, "well, good luck", quickly kissed my cheeks (like everyone else did on that day, so it's nothing special) then left... He tought he would never see me again and he just said "good luck ?!?!!" not "pleasure to know you" or "here's my e-mail" or anything..... what the hell ?!?!

Anyways.... From what i understand, he's single and not gay. But what now?!?!? Someone told me to give him my e-mail.... But i don't want to be humiliated... It's a very delicate situation.... And we don't know each other that well.... But from my point of view, when you think you see a person for the last time and you say "good luck", it kinda means you are not so much into her.... i don't know, what do you think ?!?! What would you guys do ?!?! please share your thoughts !
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #2  June 17,2010, 6:43pm
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Yay! spring has sprung.

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What have you got to lose?
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #3  June 17,2010, 6:49pm
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WayTooShyGirl wrote :
Anyways.... From what i understand, he's single and not gay. But what now?!?!? Someone told me to give him my e-mail.... But i don't want to be humiliated... It's a very delicate situation....
what's so "delicate" about the situation...I don't get it?

humiliated?? how?? what's this guy gonna do, laugh at you, because you asked for his number?
You're not even going to be working there anymore, right?


Is this the same doctor you posted about, back in March??
http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/da...ush-outch.html (Superior Crush... outch !)
Last edited by TheThinker; June 17,2010 at 6:54pm.
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #4  June 17,2010, 7:08pm
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Hummm, read that OP on the other thread.
You seem to have some very strong feelings for him.
Are you going to take those with you when you leave and continue to wonder?
Or are you going to bite the bullet once and for all and find out where you stand with this guy so you can move on?
What you call humiliation is only a momentary disappointment of not getting what you hope for. it's OK, we have all been there.
 
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WayTooShyGirl is offline WayTooShyGirl Post #5  June 17,2010, 7:18pm
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yes, it IS the same doctor.... ! LOL My crush just didn't fade out....

The delicate situation is that even though he's not my supervisor, he's a superior right.... If he tells the whole office about me asking him out, everyone's last memory of me will be "the girl who asked out this doctor"

So it's messing with me.... If i was sure he would say yes, i would put myself out there for sure ... but after today and his "good luck", i kinda get the feeling he's gonna laugh in my face and think i'm stupid ! plus, i don't know a smooth way to ask him out without being dead obvious !!!!!
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #6  June 17,2010, 7:26pm
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WayTooShyGirl wrote :
So it's messing with me.... If i was sure he would say yes, i would put myself out there for sure ...
If you were sure he'd say yes, you'd have already done it.

so here you are...what next?
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #7  June 17,2010, 7:27pm
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WayTooShyGirl wrote :
yes, it IS the same doctor.... ! LOL My crush just didn't fade out....

The delicate situation is that even though he's not my supervisor, he's a superior right.... If he tells the whole office about me asking him out, everyone's last memory of me will be "the girl who asked out this doctor"

So it's messing with me.... If i was sure he would say yes, i would put myself out there for sure ... but after today and his "good luck", i kinda get the feeling he's gonna laugh in my face and think i'm stupid ! plus, i don't know a smooth way to ask him out without being dead obvious !!!!!
But you have to be.
You really want him to missunderstand?
Where would that leave you?
I highly doubt he will tell the office. In fact I am sure he would be flattered. Have you heard of any other rumours of him telling about women who have asked him out? If so, you would have a right to be worried. If not. Swallow your pride and just be direct.
You will live.
 
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WayTooShyGirl is offline WayTooShyGirl Post #8  June 17,2010, 7:37pm
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It's funny, on the last post in march, everyone said "it's not gonna happen, forget about it !!!!"

And now, both of you say "well, go for it, you got nothing to lose ! " :P

I guess i suck at understanding dating !!! LOL Anyways, what would you say to him ?!?!? I know he fell in love with the city Prague... Should i by him something that reminds him of Prague ?!! (I have no idea of what it could be ! wine maybe... if i can find one,,,,) I can't just go in his office and go "i like you a lot... wanna go out with me" LOL
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #9  June 17,2010, 7:48pm
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I didnt read the whole thread only your first post.
Were they saying it isnt going to happen because you were waiting for him to ask you out?


You know him better then the rest of us since you worked with him.
I wouldnt buy him anything. Why couldnt you go into his office and ask if he would like to go to lunch, dinner, movie sometime? Skip the I like you. He would gather that, if he hasnt already.
If you keep it simple there is less to be nervous about.
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #10  June 17,2010, 8:01pm
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WayTooShyGirl wrote :
It's funny, on the last post in march, everyone said "it's not gonna happen, forget about it !!!!"

And now, both of you say "well, go for it, you got nothing to lose ! " :P

I guess i suck at understanding dating !!! LOL Anyways, what would you say to him ?!?!? I know he fell in love with the city Prague... Should i by him something that reminds him of Prague ?!! (I have no idea of what it could be ! wine maybe... if i can find one,,,,) I can't just go in his office and go "i like you a lot... wanna go out with me" LOL
Yikes! No -- don't buy someone you want to date something. It's like you are trying to buy their affection. It looks desperate. He probably has souvenirs or pictures of Prague to remind him of Prague anyway.

I agree with the others who are saying to just be direct. Ask him out to lunch or a drink. You might even say something about thinking it would be interesting to spend lunch/drink together getting to know each other outside of work now that you won't be working together any more.

I am somewhat in agreement with the original feedback you got that nothing's gonna happen, but you have to be in it to win it, and you are leaving. You really have nothing to lose by asking him. Who cares what people think of you when you leave as their last memory? Do you really think a little gossip of you asking this doctor out could be that important to them? I think it's unlikely that this would be how you would be remembered.

I say go for it, but steel yourself for possible rejection. Good luck!
 
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