Why do people take pride in being "blunt"?


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KungFuFtr is offline KungFuFtr Post #1  June 12,2010, 12:43pm
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I read a profile today that stated, "I'm very blunt and I tell it how it is. Hey, it's not my fault if you can't handle the truth."

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What did that accomplish besides me rapidly closing this person out?

I've noticed several profiles regarding how blunt someone claims to be. Do you find this to be a positive quality? Why would someone take pride in bluntness? I prefer tact and grace, but that's just me.
Do you feel that claiming to be "blunt" is becoming cliche?
 
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Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  June 12,2010, 12:53pm
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Blunt. Blunt blunt blunt. Blunt.

That's an odd word, if you keep repeating it, isn't it?! It's almost onomatopoeic! Sound like hitting you over the head with a blunt instrument!
 
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newbie40something is offline newbie40something Post #3  June 12,2010, 12:59pm
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There are times to be blunt. But, stating that in a profile doesn't seem necessary. Kind of implies that being blunt is common occurence for her.

I agree that tact and grace is more appealing. I don't blame you for closing out.

Just being blunt.
 
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DashMN is offline DashMN Post #4  June 12,2010, 1:03pm
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I've been called blunt, direct, forthright, open, you name it. Whether someone perceives that as a positive or a negative depends on their personal comfort level. Personally, I think of myself as being very direct, but I could see how some people would think of that as blunt. I have a co-worker who is also very direct, we get along famously. I've had others who are very reserved with their opinions, and they sometimes find my direct nature to be disconcerting.

As to someone taking pride in being blunt, I'd guess that is their way of warning you that they are a very direct person. Probably they've had dates that were very put off by their direct nature, and they want to weed those people out before experiencing the let down of another date who was uncomfortable with it.

By the way, next one you come across like that, send them my way. I happen to prefer people who can be direct with their opinions.
 
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Andie0264 is offline Andie0264 Post #5  June 12,2010, 1:04pm
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I don't think being blunt and tactful are mutually exclusive. To me, being blunt means not hiding from the truth or from a difficult conversation. That doesn't mean you can't use tact in the difficult conversation, or in refusing to hide from the truth. For example, if you know someone who has a hygeine problem and you feel compelled to address it, there is a world of difference between telling someone "You stink" and mentioning that you have noticed an aroma about the person that isn't entirely pleasant and asking if the person is ok. I think the second statement is blunt, but not tactless.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #6  June 12,2010, 1:04pm
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They bein' blunt yo!
 
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Cape_Codder is offline Cape_Codder Post #7  June 12,2010, 1:07pm

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KungFuFtr wrote :
I read a profile today that stated, "I'm very blunt and I tell it how it is. Hey, it's not my fault if you can't handle the truth."

Alright...
What did that accomplish besides me rapidly closing this person out?

I've noticed several profiles regarding how blunt someone claims to be. Do you find this to be a positive quality? Why would someone take pride in bluntness? I prefer tact and grace, but that's just me.
Do you feel that claiming to be "blunt" is becoming cliche?
Some align the notion that bluntness equates with honesty, ie, brutally honest is the phrase that comes to mind. They fail to appreciate that honesty does not require one to browbeat someone with facts.

They take pride in bluntness because they don't appreciate or possess the requisite skills to convey facts that may sometimes be hurtful, in a more tactful manner.

They live in a one dimensional world that prohibits them to think outside the box.
 
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newbie40something is offline newbie40something Post #8  June 12,2010, 1:08pm
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KungFuFtr wrote :
I read a profile today that stated, "I'm very blunt and I tell it how it is. Hey, it's not my fault if you can't handle the truth."

Alright...
What did that accomplish besides me rapidly closing this person out?

I've noticed several profiles regarding how blunt someone claims to be. Do you find this to be a positive quality? Why would someone take pride in bluntness? I prefer tact and grace, but that's just me.
Do you feel that claiming to be "blunt" is becoming cliche?
The bolded and underlined part is what I found unappealing. Doesn't seem necessary.
 
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DashMN is offline DashMN Post #9  June 12,2010, 1:20pm
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Cape_Codder wrote :
Some align the notion that bluntness equates with honesty, ie, brutally honest is the phrase that comes to mind. They fail to appreciate that honesty does not require one to browbeat someone with facts.

They take pride in bluntness because they don't appreciate or possess the requisite skills to convey facts that may sometimes be hurtful, in a more tactful manner.

They live in a one dimensional world that prohibits them to think outside the box.
That seems awfully judgmental of people who are different than you, if you ask me.

I'm sorry, but I have to offer the opposing view here. Replacing a few words here and there, and the same statements take on a very different meaning.

Some align the notion that tact equates with politeness, ie, constructive criticism is the phrase that comes to mind. They fail to appreciate that tact does not require one to delicately dance around the truth.

They take pride in tact because they don't appreciate or possess the requisite skills to convey facts that may sometimes be hurtful, in an emotionally honest manner.

They live in a one dimensional world that prohibits them to think outside the box.

I'm just trying to make the point that we all have different comfort levels. It doesn't make one any more grounded in reality than the other.
Last edited by DashMN; June 12,2010 at 1:21pm. Reason: Added the last two sentences.
 
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waltercl is offline waltercl Post #10  June 12,2010, 1:30pm
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I've seen this in various forms in different profiles as well.

What I hear is: "I can sometimes be a real b**** so watch out!"

Duly noted. Closed and moving on
 
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