Why do guys feel that if you're attractive and have a great personality that you MUST already have someone special or somethi


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michelle_nova69 is offline michelle_nova69 Post #1  June 3,2010, 6:56am
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Why do guys feel that if you're attractive and have a great personality that you MUST already have someone special or something has to be wrong with you?

And if I am correct and most guys feel this way... what am I to do?
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #2  June 3,2010, 7:00am
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No, you are not correct.
But why do you believe that all guys feel that way?
 
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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #3  June 3,2010, 7:06am
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Oh, I get that a lot from guys online. They say, "you're so beautiful, how can you possibly be single?!!!" and that makes me feel like they think that only losers are available for online dating and that they are going to be looking for my hidden "flaw" once we're together!!!

I totally see that. It happens in real life, too. Over the years, I've had guys walk up and say, "Do you have a man? You must, because you're so beautiful!" Of course, that's an easy out if I'm not into them, cause I can just say, "oh yes, sorry!" and walk away.

but yes, I totally get that.

and honestly, I've only typically had short windows of single availability in my life. usually defined by 2-3 months tops. I'm not typically available on the market. so their assessment is kind of true.
 
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Antalicus is offline Antalicus Post #4  June 3,2010, 7:12am
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If you don't have an answer that makes sense then yes guys think there is something wrong with you.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #5  June 3,2010, 7:14am
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cricket99 wrote :
Oh, I get that a lot from guys online. They say, "you're so beautiful, how can you possibly be single?!!!" and that makes me feel like they think that only losers are available for online dating and that they are going to be looking for my hidden "flaw" once we're together!!!
Well...

those are among the cheesy lines that are thrown out like, "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
 
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Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #6  June 3,2010, 7:17am
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I don't think you're correct, so this is not a problem you have to deal with!

Has someone said something along those lines to you?
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #7  June 3,2010, 7:26am
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This line a favorite among the insecure and quite frankly it's rather tactless. On the bright side, guys worth dating don't carry that kind of an attitude and will not say something like that to you.
 
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Cape_Codder is offline Cape_Codder Post #8  June 3,2010, 7:28am

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michelle_nova69 wrote :
Why do guys feel that if you're attractive and have a great personality that you MUST already have someone special or something has to be wrong with you?

And if I am correct and most guys feel this way... what am I to do?
I would not be concerned, you yourself have stated that there have only been short periods of time that you have not been in a relationship.

Some men who express the rationale that you are to attractive to be single are often implying that your good looks give them a sense of inadequacy; they are afraid that they would be turned down if they asked you out.

Online dating gives you the chance to take the initiative, find some profiles you like and initiate contact. Why do you have to wait for them to contact you?

Or, you can come to Boston for a visit and we can discuss it over dinner!
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #9  June 3,2010, 7:38am
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Cape_Codder wrote :
I would not be concerned, you yourself have stated that there have only been short periods of time that you have not been in a relationship.
The OP never said that...cricket did.
 
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Cape_Codder is offline Cape_Codder Post #10  June 3,2010, 7:46am

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TheThinker wrote :
The OP never said that...cricket did.
Thank you, I misstated, by bad.
 
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