Should he be scheduling a date to get together?


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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #1  June 3,2010, 6:32am
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I've been dating a great guy for two whopping weeks now.

it's been going great and we've had six dates in those two weeks. every other time at the end of our date, he made plans for the next time we'd get together. but at the end of our last date, he didn't. I had already invited him to a graduation bbq with my best friends on this coming saturday, but he needed a day to figure out his schedule, he said, and then he let me know yesterday that he'd be working with his dad during the day on Saturday and couldn't make it. he also confessed that meeting my friends made him a little nervous. so I get that. hard to meet 50 friends of the new girl you're dating at one time!

I think he's really into me, but I want to make sure. i don't want to chase him!

for reference, he's emailed me each day we're apart (he has his kids right now), and says he can't wait until he sees me again. but he hasn't set a specific date for that to happen.

there are a lot of reasons why it's good to know in advance the set dates. I have a child, he has children, and we have to coordinate our flexible childcare schedules with our ex's based on what we have planned. so I let him know the next few days I would be free, and he told me his, but then didn't issue an invitation for a date. Not yet at least. It is Thursday. The weekend is in two days. I always feel like guys call girls to ask them for weekend dates at least a couple of days in advance.

Is this a red flag? or am I just being paranoid?
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #2  June 3,2010, 6:35am
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Your being paranoid.
 
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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #3  June 3,2010, 6:36am
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livenlearn wrote :
Your being paranoid.
I know, I know. I have been dumped on a lot by guys and it's very easy to get paranoid and worried. I've also dated some of those guys who just disappear for no reason. The ones that seem like they love you, then disappear without a trace.

So that makes a girl paranoid. and that's why I'm posting here to get advice rather than contacting him on a day where he has his kids and is busy playing with them and possibly coming across as desperate!
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #4  June 3,2010, 6:36am
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Do you own a phone?
 
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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #5  June 3,2010, 6:39am
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thinker, yes, but I'm only available via phone in brief spurts during the day. usually after 10 p.m. at night, and I usually go to bed by 10 p.m. email/text is the best way to reach me.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #6  June 3,2010, 6:42am
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cricket99 wrote :
...
Is this a red flag? or am I just being paranoid?
The way I read this situation is not as a red flag. He has lost interest in you.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #7  June 3,2010, 6:45am
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6 dates in 2 weeks - that's pretty much seeing each other every free moment you've got and setting aside things you need to do to accommodate that much face time with someone. Does it occur to you that maybe you both should give each other some breathing room and that perhaps he does have things he needs to take care of besides just spending every moment with you? Also, if he planned 6 dates, seems to me that maybe it's your turn to reciprocate? But really, it just seems like he needs some space to do other things and you should have some space for yourself as well. Healthy relationships need balance, and I don't see much balance happening here.
 
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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #8  June 3,2010, 6:48am
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our last date only ended tuesday morning. so it's not as if it's been eons since we've seen each other.
 
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cricket99 is offline cricket99 Post #9  June 3,2010, 6:48am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
The way I read this situation is not as a red flag. He has lost interest in you.
ouch! bad mood today?
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #10  June 3,2010, 6:50am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
The way I read this situation is not as a red flag. He has lost interest in you.
Did you notice she said he has his "children"?
 
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