How do i break it off?


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BigRon is offline BigRon Post #1  May 30,2010, 4:19pm
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I have bad karma and it's coming back to me...in the worst way...
I met a girl online that I wasn't really into, but I never really go out at night or look for girls, plus I was really lonely and bored so I went out with her anyways. She's really nice and cool but I feel so bad that I've let it go on for this long. Even though I'm 25 and she's 20, she seems really really immature and even though she's overweight, that's not the problem to me. She watches cartoons, doesn't have a job, doesn't go to school, and the only thing it seems she ever does is shop or babysit for her nephew...Anyways, she seems totally in love with me (she texts me like crazy nonstop for about a month now), and I feel like the sooner I break it off the better.

The sick thing is that I've recently come to the realization that I'm using her to make me feel better about myself and I can't even look in the mirror. When I break it off, it's gonna destroy her...so I already feel miserable...

and yes, I'm the same clueless fool in the other thread who blew it with the other girl...you know, the one I actually liked...
 
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Breezy1 is offline Breezy1 Post #2  May 30,2010, 4:33pm
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BigRon wrote :
I have bad karma and it's coming back to me...in the worst way...
I met a girl online that I wasn't really into, but I never really go out at night or look for girls, plus I was really lonely and bored so I went out with her anyways. She's really nice and cool but I feel so bad that I've let it go on for this long. Even though I'm 25 and she's 20, she seems really really immature and even though she's overweight, that's not the problem to me. She watches cartoons, doesn't have a job, doesn't go to school, and the only thing it seems she ever does is shop or babysit for her nephew...Anyways, she seems totally in love with me (she texts me like crazy nonstop for about a month now), and I feel like the sooner I break it off the better.

The sick thing is that I've recently come to the realization that I'm using her to make me feel better about myself and I can't even look in the mirror. When I break it off, it's gonna destroy her...so I already feel miserable...

and yes, I'm the same clueless fool in the other thread who blew it with the other girl...you know, the one I actually liked...
If this is how you truly feel, then you have to come clean and tell her that you don't feel that the relationship is what you are looking for right now. Going forward, you probably should be more selective in who you date, so that you don't end up taking some girl for a ride because you had nothing better to do.

You give her very little credit in this post, She may be upset that you are breaking up with her, but I doubt that it will "destroy" her. Jump down off of that high horse, k? She may very well be immature, but it doesn't seem that you are showing maturity in your action or words, either.

And I can't help but ask, why did you feel the need to mention that she is overweight if it truly is inconsequential to you?
Last edited by Breezy1; May 30,2010 at 4:37pm.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #3  May 30,2010, 4:37pm
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If your issue is a desire to end things, then you say "I'm not going to continue this relationship."

Personally, I will give the honest reason(s) when I am asked why (which is always.)

If you have a specific deal-breaker, which you feel she might anyway wish to fix for herself (such as everything about herself, per your description), then it might be okay to wait and be supportive.

That's not a popular idea, though, since most people express an opinion called "if you don't love someone as they are, then leave."
 
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BigRon is offline BigRon Post #4  May 30,2010, 4:37pm
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Breezy1 wrote :
If this is how you truly feel, then you have to come clean and tell her that you don't feel that the relationship is what you are looking for right now. Going forward, you probably should be more selective in who you date, so that you don't end up taking some girl for a ride because you had nothing better to do.

You give her very little credit in this post, She may be upset that you are breaking up with her, but I doubt that it will "destroy" her. Jump down off of that high horse, k?

And I can't help but ask, why did you feel the need to mention that she is overweight if it truly is inconsequential to you?
it's not that i'm on a high horse, it's just that I have definitely come off (to her) as a good person (which I am not)...and i mentioned the overweight thing because that's why she'll probably think I broke up with her...
 
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annother is offline annother Post #5  May 30,2010, 4:49pm
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How long have you been a couple? This makes a difference, I think, to the reponse you might expect.

Yes, she will be upset, but that's the music you have to face, as we all do when we decide that a relationship is not working out.
 
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szgorzelski is offline szgorzelski Post #6  May 30,2010, 4:57pm
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You could tell her that it's best you break up because you don't have enough grass in your yard for her to properly graze.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #7  May 30,2010, 4:58pm
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It's not clear they're actually a couple. He doesn't mention ever meeting in person.

I would just call her and say you're not interested in seeing her (again) and ask her to stop texting you.
 
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livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #8  May 30,2010, 5:25pm
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szgorzelski wrote :
You could tell her that it's best you break up because you don't have enough grass in your yard for her to properly graze.

Your not unbearably awesome. You are unbearably rude.
Tsk tsk.
 
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dazedconfuzed is offline dazedconfuzed Post #9  May 30,2010, 5:46pm
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szgorzelski wrote :
You could tell her that it's best you break up because you don't have enough grass in your yard for her to properly graze.


REALLY?
And that's appropriate HOW?



***

OP, be honest and stop leading her on. The longer you wait, the more it will hurt.
 
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szgorzelski is offline szgorzelski Post #10  May 30,2010, 7:51pm
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livenlearn wrote :

Your not unbearably awesome. You are unbearably rude.
Tsk tsk.
I know.
 
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