Women please help me!


Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
BigRon is offline BigRon Post #1  May 30,2010, 1:09pm
BigRon's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: May 2010

Posts: 4

See profile

Ok I'm 95% sure I've already messed things up somehow, but I just wanna know how I messed up...

There was a high school party with a bunch of old classmates from facebook and everything, and this girl I haven't seen since high school was there. She definitely recognized me and I saw her looking at me a few times. Anyways, after a few hours, I noticed her and her friends were about to leave, so I started talking to her and she seemed interested, we talked and laughed or whatever, and I got her number.

So a few days later, I called her and left a message. She called me back an hour later but I wasn't near my phone at the time, so a little later i texted her, she texted back, i made her laugh, it seemed like things were going good, but then my friend told me to stop texting her and then casually the next day text her "so when are you free?" out of nowhere...she didn't respond, so a few days later, I texted her again telling her I had a thing for her but she was with someone else at prom so I couldn't really talk to her (the first time we met was at prom, and we pretty much never saw each other for 8 years until last week).

So anyways, when I told her I had a thing for her she said "lol what?" I don't know if she was blushing or if she was laughing at me, so I changed the subject or whatever, we texted a few more times, and then I called her a few hours later to ask her out, she didn't answer or return the call.

Then yesterday, called her again, she didn't answer. I'm sure she's not interested, but I just wanna know where I went wrong...did I wait too long and not ask her out quickly enough? Did I wrongfully follow my dumbass friends' advice? Why did she lose interest? I have a feeling she was interested before....
 
  Reply With Quote
D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  May 30,2010, 1:22pm
D_Lion's Avatar

- Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Joined: Aug 2008

Posts: 31,677

See profile

In the eight years since being in high school, it might have been a good idea to put on at least a few years of maturity.

I suggest not telling a woman you "have a thing for" her.

It would have been fine to ask her out then (especially if you were the two of you alone), or use the phone number she gave you to do so, in a day or two.

Personally, I think you should not communicate electronically beyond having set up the meeting.

There wasn't any reason to delay asking, and delay here is a very bad approach.
 
  Reply With Quote
livenlearn is offline livenlearn Post #3  May 30,2010, 1:27pm
livenlearn's Avatar

Yay! spring has sprung.

Virtuoso

Joined: Dec 2009

cosmos

Posts: 3,439

See profile

You listened to your friend and texted her.
Thats where you went wrong. It's been 8 years since high school?
 
  Reply With Quote
BigRon is offline BigRon Post #4  May 30,2010, 1:29pm
BigRon's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: May 2010

Posts: 4

See profile

D_Lion wrote :
In the eight years since being in high school, it might have been a good idea to put on at least a few years of maturity.

I suggest not telling a woman you "have a thing for" her.

It would have been fine to ask her out then (especially if you were the two of you alone), or use the phone number she gave you to do so, in a day or two.

Personally, I think you should not communicate electronically beyond having set up the meeting.

There wasn't any reason to delay asking, and delay here is a very bad approach.
is there anything i can do now? or am i pretty much screwed?
 
  Reply With Quote
D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #5  May 30,2010, 1:41pm
D_Lion's Avatar

- Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Joined: Aug 2008

Posts: 31,677

See profile

You can still call and invite her on a date, using a specific plan.

I would say "May I take you to dinner at [name of restaurant] this Friday?"

I suggest, though, trying not to care what she chooses to do.
 
  Reply With Quote
Dropdeadredtx is online now Dropdeadredtx Post #6  May 30,2010, 1:48pm
Dropdeadredtx's Avatar

Still listening for the jingle of dog tags that isn't there...

Board Leader - Books

Joined: Apr 2010

Houston

Posts: 14,635

See profile

Maybe a phone call or a message -NOT a text - along the lines of "Hey, I hope I didn't blow this, I would love to meet you for coffee or drinks. Please give me a call if you are interested and available."

Then if there is no response, you are done!
 
  Reply With Quote
landstar59 is offline landstar59 Post #7  May 30,2010, 1:52pm
landstar59's Avatar

There is no fear in love.

Veteran

Joined: Apr 2008

30.5 Lat / -90.45 Long

Posts: 1,921

See profile

I would have to agree with D Lion in that telling her you had a thing for her back then at the onset of just getting back in touch with her. I remember at one of my class reunions there was only one person I could not figure out who he was for the life of me. Curious, I went up to him and said, "you know you are the only person I can't place." That's when he divulged that he always wanted to touch my hair. I laughed but I found it a little creepy.

You can try but you may not be able to repair the damage. She may just not be interested. I think more it was that she was being polite. Sorry.
 
  Reply With Quote
Nanette is offline Nanette Post #8  May 30,2010, 2:02pm
Nanette's Avatar

~ giving gentle smack-downs... vewy vewy gentle

Power Poster

Joined: Jun 2008

Posts: 7,451

See profile

BigRon wrote :
Did I wrongfully follow my dumbass friends' advice?
yeah maybe this. what is up with this carp anyway?

you should have just asked her out right away.

theres a good chance that she wasnt interested in the first place, but truthfully it never looks good when a guy texts that kind of stuff, and especially before you even had a date
 
  Reply With Quote
heisenberg is offline heisenberg Post #9  May 30,2010, 2:18pm
heisenberg's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Apr 2010

Central Texas Hill Country

Posts: 130

See profile

When you text with a request for a date and get no response, and follow this up with a call and get no answer...

SHE'S NOT INTERESTED!!!

So leave her alone and move on...

Whatever caused her to go from lukewarn to cold, is not very likely to change and heat back up at this point.

You can second guess what went wrong til the cows come home, but any more attempts to ask her out will likely creep her out more than having texted her that you had "a thing for her", and more likely than not make her feel she is being stalked...
 
  Reply With Quote
AndieIsMe is online now AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #10  May 30,2010, 2:32pm
AndieIsMe's Avatar

A letter in the mail is more precious than a 1000 IMs

Volunteer Community Leader

Joined: Nov 2009

Emerald Triangle

Posts: 8,147

See profile

I think when you stopped texting her then the next day ask her out is where you went wrong. It didn't help you telling her via text that you had a thing for her in high school.

My advice. Think for yourself. Don't let what "works" for your friends guide you.

You might still be able to fix this. Call her. Leave a message if she doesn't answer. If she does answer, ask her out. Be specific on the date, time, etc.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2


« feel so anxious and nervous before first date - tips? | Dating | First Impressions: Do they matter in the long run? »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Intelligent Women satori_123 Dating 454 April 17,2012 5:44am
Do men really like full figured women? DIVINE_DESIGNS7 About You 437 January 15,2012 3:28pm
Dateless?? Women can handle this much better than men! Ladyjuju Dating 103 January 17,2011 8:37am
Old Fashioned Romance & Courtship Just_A_Thought Love in Color 78 May 31,2009 6:54pm
Having Friends DennisWisconsin A Man's Point of view 3 May 24,2009 7:54am

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Sometimes it is better than going on a so-so date just to fill your calendar.” –  sun73

Join the “dreaded free weekend” discussion

“When a man dates women, especially exclusively, who are much more physically attractive, I think he gets exactly what he's asking for and what he deserves - a woman who is not physically attracted to ... ” –  Bluskies4ever3

Join the “My first "Matchmaker" date” discussion

“Always trust your instincts.” –  sun73

Join the “Yellow flags...To Proceed or not to proceed, that is the question?” discussion

“ I was never into David Cassidy. Now, Shaun Cassidy... loved him! (And he was such a girl, too. So pretty!) I still have his album, too. I think it has my sister's name sticker on it, too. ” –  mitchell175

Join the “Robin Gibbs Dead at 62...How Deep is Your Love?” discussion

“I enjoy walking my german shepherd.” –  sun73

Join the “Friday Night Roll Call !!! Sweaty Summer Fun edition!” discussion

“Hmm. I think we are using the term 'preference' differently. Anyway, you can choose 'not important' for everything if you want the widest range of choices possible. If you do that and still don't get ... ” –  mitchell175

Join the “Different Strategy” discussion

“Seriously? That cloud looks nothing like George Clooney!” –  mitchell175

Join the “Comment to win a FREE month of eHarmony!” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 11:23pm.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0