kissme1970 is offline kissme1970 Post #1  May 28,2010, 3:32pm
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I've been dating for about a year, but I'm new to this forum.

Three out of my last four dates have canceled within a few hours to less than an hour before the date. They all notified me via a text message and then I basically never heard from them again. Each of these guys made a big deal about really wanting to meet me.

Guys -- do you do this and why?

Gals -- are you having the same experience?

Just curious to know why. Thanks for the help.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  May 28,2010, 3:35pm
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- I have never cancelled a meeting unless it's a work emergency (and that was not too common; I can not think of ever cancelling a first meeting.)

- I have never sent a text message.

Since I am normal, I can not explain why this has happened to you. Sorry.
 
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annother is offline annother Post #3  May 28,2010, 3:43pm
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How rude! Texting a date cancellation doubles the rudeness of the cancellation itself. The only way to justify it would be a serious personal or professional emergency.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  May 28,2010, 3:47pm
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annother wrote :
How rude! Texting a date cancellation doubles the rudeness of the cancellation itself. The only way to justify it would be a serious personal or professional emergency.

In which case it is not actually necessarily to disclose the nature of the "emergency" - but a requirement to provide an alternative arrangement, substantially similar in form to that which was cancelled.

Since niether event transpired, the OP is free to find another to Kiss, annother ... such as myself!
 
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cal_dude is online now cal_dude Post #5  May 28,2010, 4:23pm
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That's way too many flakes at once! OP: do re-read your profile carefully -- maybe something is making them uneasy when they prepare for a date? I would never cancel like this, unless a huge red flag comes up. One of my recent matches who was canceling and changing the date/time a lot, later admitted to be in a relationship (where she "wasn't appreciated"
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #6  May 28,2010, 4:25pm
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cal_dude wrote :
One of my recent matches who was canceling and changing the date/time a lot, later admitted to be in a relationship (where she "wasn't appreciated"

I can see why.
 
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AndieIsMe is online now AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #7  May 28,2010, 4:26pm
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Were these all first dates or had you been out with them before?
 
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annother is offline annother Post #8  May 28,2010, 5:06pm
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D_Lion wrote :
In which case it is not actually necessarily to disclose the nature of the "emergency" - but a requirement to provide an alternative arrangement, substantially similar in form to that which was cancelled.

Since niether event transpired, the OP is free to find another to Kiss, annother ... such as myself!
I agree. Kissme1970, are you paying attention? I think DL is offering his dating expertise.
 
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NYCpigeon is offline NYCpigeon Post #9  May 28,2010, 6:03pm
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kissme1970 wrote :
I've been dating for about a year, but I'm new to this forum.

Three out of my last four dates have canceled within a few hours to less than an hour before the date. They all notified me via a text message and then I basically never heard from them again. Each of these guys made a big deal about really wanting to meet me.

Guys -- do you do this and why?

Gals -- are you having the same experience?

Just curious to know why. Thanks for the help.
Did you meet them on Eharmony or was it another site? On other sites where there is less of an investment made towards meeting new people, there are more flakes to be found. That is people who are less serious and possibly using the dating site as a passtime for boredom.
 
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ami1uwant is online now ami1uwant Post #10  May 28,2010, 11:05pm
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kissme1970 wrote :
I've been dating for about a year, but I'm new to this forum.

Three out of my last four dates have canceled within a few hours to less than an hour before the date. They all notified me via a text message and then I basically never heard from them again. Each of these guys made a big deal about really wanting to meet me.

Guys -- do you do this and why?
I dont do this. Sure things can happen where you need to cancel for legit reasons. If that happened on my end I would make an effort to reschedule the date.

Some legit reasons could be work, kids, yourself becoming sick.

What I have found ....and I think this is true with both sexes.......With online dating its out of sight--out of mind.

I have been guilty of this. You get to open communication with someone on EH sometimes you meant to reply but then got sidetracked or timing was off (work/vacation travel) and then rescheduling or recommunicating slips your mind until its been a little to long then you dont want to try and communicate and look like a fool.

I do think alot of these guys cancel and dont reschedul because they are involved with someone else and it got serious.

With ehamony...never assume you are the only person they are talking to because that generally isnt the case. That is true with women. If it gets cancelled for friday night and he already had a date with girl #2 on saturday night which went really well so he isnt going to bother calling you until this thing with girl # 2 ends.
 
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