Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Dating First-date jitters? Hoping for a second date? Moving on to a full blown relationship? Share your journey and advice here.

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
michaell1999 michaell1999 is offline
michaell1999's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Nov 2007

Posts: 46

See profile




I had a friend say I might be trying too hard to impress. She suggested I dress more casual. Ladies, is it OK for me to wear boots, jeans, and a t-shirt that says "No, I will not fix your computer" ?
- May 30th, 2008, 09:59 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
javajava5 javajava5 is offline
javajava5's Avatar

Virtuoso

Join Date: Dec 2007

Posts: 3,067

See profile



Dear Michael1999,

You don't mention what kind of date you're going on: Coffee? Dinner? Party? Beach? Country-Western dancing? Movie?

Not enough information is known; however, it's alway appropriate to dress for the occasion. It does seem people tend to dress down more now.

I'd say no on the T-shirt especially with the saying.

However you go, beforehand, shower, shave, wearclean clothes without holes (sometimes jeans get holes), be well-groomed, get a hair-cut if you need one, have clean fingernails, be sure your boots aren't scruffed if you decide to wear them, etc. Women tend to notice those things.

JavaJava5
- May 30th, 2008, 10:23 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
javajava5 javajava5 is offline
javajava5's Avatar

Virtuoso

Join Date: Dec 2007

Posts: 3,067

See profile

P. S. Actually, going back and looking at your picture on your Profile page, you look really nice in what you're wearing in the picture besides being quite well-groomed. I don't think you have anything to worry about whatsoever in that department. You seem to have a sense of style and what looks good on you. Go with what you think is right and what fits your date. It doesn't seem that you'd go wrong.
- May 30th, 2008, 10:28 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
BoyFromOz BoyFromOz is offline
BoyFromOz's Avatar

BoyFromOz is no longer single!!! And very happy :)

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 56

See profile

javajava5 wrote :

Dear Michael1999,

You don't mention what kind of date you're going on: Coffee? Dinner? Party? Beach? Country-Western dancing? Movie?

Not enough information is known; however, it's alway appropriate to dress for the occasion. It does seem people tend to dress down more now.

I'd say no on the T-shirt especially with the saying.

However you go, beforehand, shower, shave, wearclean clothes without holes (sometimes jeans get holes), be well-groomed, get a hair-cut if you need one, have clean fingernails, be sure your boots aren't scruffed if you decide to wear them, etc. Women tend to notice those things.

JavaJava5
Agreed, good one java! Also, get the feel of the girl & situation andimagine what sort of outfit she might turn up in - that can give you a clue as to what you should wear yourself. I think smart casual if no other clues. BTW remember what you wore on your first date andavoid wearing it on the second or third dates should they occur- women tend to notice these thingstoo!

BFO
- May 30th, 2008, 10:36 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
whitman whitman is offline
whitman's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 51

See profile



Michael, I used to have that problem myself. When the first thing your date says to you is "why are you dressed up like that?" things aren't off to a smooth start. A sharp, casual outfit seems to work best in most situations. There are two things you are trying to convey: that you care about your appearance and that you know how to relax.

My advice is to start with a pair of jeans that fit you well and dress it up as nicely as you can. That particular novelty t-shirt sounds fun, but a nice shirt or a polo or something might put you in a middle area, in case she came in a dress or something.


And pay attention to your shoes. I always wear dress shoes with a great pair of jeans and a sporty shirt to a date in a casual setting. It is a look that gets a lot of positive notice. Boots are probably a good pick, too.

But that's just the best I've come up with. I'll enjoy hearing other people's thoughts as well.

- May 30th, 2008, 10:37 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

LizziePooh LizziePooh is offline
LizziePooh's Avatar

LizziePooh has decided to put her luck to the test.

Virtuoso

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 4,320

See profile



Hi Michael,

I believe everyone here provided you with good advice. You may dress more casual if the date is during the day and not in the evening. I would not go too casual (IE: T-shirt). A girl just wants to know that you took a some effort to get dressed. I know it takes me over an hour to lookeffortlessly casual!Wear what makes you comfortable. We just don't want to think that you just rolled out of bed to meet us for coffee. And Whitman's right, we do notice if you are wearing the same thing again.

Good luck!
- May 30th, 2008, 12:39 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
Glider_Pilot Glider_Pilot is offline
Glider_Pilot's Avatar

Glider_Pilot Out there. Somewhere.

Veteran

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 2,409

See profile



I'm another one that thinks it's entirely contextual. If your first date is to the beach or hiking, then yeah, totally casual is the way to go.

If you're eating a meal, however, it needs to go up a notch. In recent times, I've most commonly worn nice jeans, black leather shoes, and a 'dressy' black ribbed tee (no art or logos on it, and it's fitted). It's a combo that works for me. That's for something like wine-tasting or a more-casual dinner where I've actually already met the person once - or for a casual dinner party where I might meet someone. The way I'm built, baggy tees or non-fitted shirts just hang and make me look fat. A fitted tee happens to be a little less casual, so it all works out.

For a nice dinner out, slacks and a fitted collared shirt, absolutely. If it's a nice place, add on a tie and sport coat, but that's definitely in the minority, since I generally don't do first dates at that sort of place. Makes both people too stiff and formal.

What did ZZ Top say? "Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man." The trick to it is to make sure you're 'sharp' for the particular occasion you're attending.
- May 30th, 2008, 01:48 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
Glider_Pilot Glider_Pilot is offline
Glider_Pilot's Avatar

Glider_Pilot Out there. Somewhere.

Veteran

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 2,409

See profile

I should also add that I'm living in California, where things are generally a little more casual. I don't know how it is in Atlanta - I've never been there. I suspect you're similar to us, though, so the outfit you're wearing in your avatar photo would be fine with jeans - if you lose the jacket. Jackets are 'low-end formal' here. Might want to check around and see how that's done in your area.
- May 30th, 2008, 01:52 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#8   Reply With Quote
whitman whitman is offline
whitman's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 51

See profile

Glider_Pilot wrote :
Jackets are 'low-end formal' here. Might want to check around and see how that's done in your area.
Totally agree. I love throwing on a sportscoat with jeans and a white shirt to tool around town or whatever. To me, it is a clean, casual look and cool because it conceals a wrinkled shirt. But I never wear a coat on a first date anymore. It doesn't seem to get a great reaction. Like the original poster's friend said, it seems to be interpreted as trying too hard.

- May 30th, 2008, 02:53 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#9   Reply With Quote
JMWTurnerFan JMWTurnerFan is offline
JMWTurnerFan's Avatar

Enthusiast

Join Date: Mar 2008

Posts: 500

See profile

BoyFromOz wrote :

javajava5 wrote :


Dear Michael1999,


You don't mention what kind of date you're going on: Coffee? Dinner? Party? Beach? Country-Western dancing? Movie?


Not enough information is known; however, it's alway appropriate to dress for the occasion. It does seem people tend to dress down more now.


I'd say no on the T-shirt especially with the saying.


However you go, beforehand, shower, shave, wear clean clothes without holes (sometimes jeans get holes), be well-groomed, get a hair-cut if you need one, have clean fingernails, be sure your boots aren't scruffed if you decide to wear them, etc. Women tend to notice those things.


JavaJava5


Agreed, good one java! Also, get the feel of the girl & situation and imagine what sort of outfit she might turn up in - that can give you a clue as to what you should wear yourself. I think smart casual if no other clues. BTW remember what you wore on your first date and avoid wearing it on the second or third dates should they occur - women tend to notice these things too!


BFO
yep. all the responses on this thread are solid. nice but casual, look at context, etc.
- May 30th, 2008, 03:12 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#10   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2

Bookmarks

« How do I get out of this? | Array | Is he or she interested in me?? »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Lilycat, go back and read what was written. You wildly misinterpreted my opening post. And then created a new post about "over-sharing." I never suggested I share my family's history. What I did ... ” – Lilycat

Join the “Alcohol and dating...” discussion

“Are you very heavy in spite of your exercise regimen? Perhaps you aren't exercising hard enough. The time put into exercise is not the same as the intensity and effort that would result in a more fit ... ” – cryhaze

Join the “Overwieght but physically active...” discussion

“ooo I love that! oh and don't worry about going alone to a work party... I've done it many times and still managed to have a blast - oh how could that have happened?” – timeless2

Join the “A Date for the *Dreaded* Company Christmas Party” discussion

“seeing a job well done” – timeless2

Join the “Great pleasure.” discussion

“Did you trade emails on regular accounts? Maybe you can get her email from your computer via autocomplete? Type in the first letter or two of her email (if you remember) and you should get a list ... ” – arby8

Join the “FCW - Interesting Problem” discussion

“One of my cats just lost another fang! I don't know how he did it, but I'm grateful that he is happy and not in much pain.” – timeless2

Join the “Ten Days Of Gratitude - Days 5 and 6” discussion

“ Been jaded long?” – chawks64

Join the “Men Have All the Power” discussion

“Relax. Have fun. Lilycat” – Lilycat

Join the “always so paranoid” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:40 am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0