Jimmy98383 is offline Jimmy98383 Post #1  May 24,2010, 11:08am
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is about to give up on dating.

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Hello everyone,

I recently went out with a girl that I met online. I asked her out to a Seattle Mariner game, knowing she was a huge fan. She said she would love to go and so we set up a time so I could pick her up. I bought her a jersey because I had one and I knew she didn't have one but wanted to get a shirt at the game so I thought I would surprise her.

I pick her up and she is really excited and absolutely loves the jersey. We cross on the ferry having a good time. She tells me that all her friends are fans too and can't wait to hear how this date went. We decided to eat at the game because we weren't hungry at the time.

We get to the game and everything is going great, I had seats 5 rows up behind the plate. Around the 7th inning, she goes outside for a smoke break and is gone 45 minutes (I don't smoke). I was getting worried and about to go look for her when she comes back with a male friend of hers and invites him to sit with us as there is a seat directly in front of her seat that is available.

I think to myself 'who is this guy'? She says that she and this guy are good friends and she saw him outside and they got caught up talking. She said that he was with his friends up in the nosebleed seats and invited him to sit near us so they could talk and catch up. I got kinda pissed off that here I was thinking we were on a date and she brings another guy to sit with us. I asked her if she could just catch up with him tomorrow and she says that he wouldn't be there long.

Anyway, about 10 minutes later she just gets up and leaves with him. I happen to be watching the game at that second and turn to her and she is halfway up the aisle walking toward the exit with him.

I follow them out, look around and finally find them outside smoking with the rest of his friends, laughing and having a nice time. I approach them and she is standing next to him a little too close for friends. I hear one of the guys say "you two should really get back together". I thought to myself, 'really? Just friends?'

I say to her, " well, since you're having a great time with your friends, I'm just gonna take off. I thought we were here on a date, but I guess not." She says to me, "I thought we we're just out having fun." I took off. She calls me the next day and asked me what my problem was, saying she was just catching up with her friends and didn't understand why I was so upset.


Now, do I need to specify to each of my dates that we are, in fact, on a date?

This is my luck with women. I don't believe that I am unattractive, I have a good job, own my own business, and have a nice place in a good part of town.

I'm sorry the story was so long, but can someone help me out here?
 
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Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  May 24,2010, 11:34am
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Hi Jimmy!

If you met her on any kind of dating site, she was waaaaay out of line. If you met her on some other kind of site, it is possible she thought it was just an outing between friends. But ... you asked her, you bought tickets (nice ones too), and a jersey, you picked her up. Walks, talks, quacks like a date ... it's a date!

Were you getting along ok? The only other thing I can think is she had her friends there as back-up in case she found you scary or something.

But overall? I'm guessing she was just waaaaay out of line. Sorry that happened!
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #3  May 24,2010, 11:34am
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Assuming you meeting her online meant that you met her through an online dating site, it should be obvious you were on a date, and she was really rude and behaved really appallingly. It's quite astonishing that she is deflecting her bad behavior back on you, like you're the one with the problem. I hope you have better luck next time.

For future reference, do not give your first dates gifts. That's a little over the top. I'm wondering if she would like to see you again because you set a precedent of gift-giving and she might like to see what else she can get from you on not-really-a-date #2.
 
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sciencegirl is offline sciencegirl Post #4  May 24,2010, 11:39am
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Apparently she wasn't really interested. If I was on a date with a guy I liked I would not abandon him for 45 minutes to talk to an ex boyfriend. It sounds like you dodged the bullet early with this one. She's rude and possibly not over an ex.
 
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Jimmy98383 is offline Jimmy98383 Post #5  May 24,2010, 11:40am
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is about to give up on dating.

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Thank you both, good insight into what not to do. Yes, it was a dating site. I just have to not let it get me down and move on.
 
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Daphnie is offline Daphnie Post #6  May 24,2010, 11:44am
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Jimmy:

Add her to your Hall of Infame and move on. She doesn't deserve a minute more of your time.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #7  May 24,2010, 11:58am
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I would have left her there too.

We haven't had a 1st date horror story thread for awhile, maybe this would be a good start.
 
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Jimmy98383 is offline Jimmy98383 Post #8  May 24,2010, 12:00pm
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Thanks everyone, great advice.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #9  May 24,2010, 12:16pm

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ouch yeah sorry man.
 
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ThePriestess is offline ThePriestess Post #10  May 24,2010, 12:22pm
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Where you went wrong ... being understanding when she disappeared for 45 minutes ... *flails* ...
 
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