jred8300 is offline jred8300 Post #1  May 24,2010, 9:39am
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Okay so about 6 years ago I dated this girl and things didnt work out primarly because we were both very young and inexperienced in the dating game. We dated basically over physical attraction as most young inexperienced people do. She's a very beautiful girl. But after the breakup we literally havent spoken a word to each other. Now its 6 years later and about a week ago her best friend texts me and tells me that she wants to get with me. So we begin talking and things were going well. A couple days later she came to my basketball game and we hung out after. We went to her best friends house and were just chilling and watched a movie. During the movie she was tired and fell asleep on top of me. The chemistry seemed great. The next morining I bought her breafast and decided to just ask her out. She said, "Maybe." probably to play a little hard to get but I think this was a mistake by me by asking her out so quickly. Then the next friday we were planning on hanging out during the morning and afternoon hours because she had to work that night. Turns out that she couldnt hang out because she said, "I have to get my dress tailored." Prior to this day she made no comment of any such task. So in my head in saying OK whatever. Then she proposed to go to the movies that sunday and that didnt happen either. Now I dont understand what shes trying to do. I know she likes me. She calls me babe and told me I was "Madd Cute." Did I screw up something along the way or is she playing mind games because I really do like her a lot
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #2  May 24,2010, 10:29am
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Sounds like nothing much has changed in 6 years - the physical attraction is still there, but the basic compatibility is not and at the very least she hasn't matured any based on her behavior toward you. In short, whatever the reasons that ended the relationship the first time, are still present the second time around.

As for how much more effort you want to give this, it's really up to you. My rule of thumb is that I'll give things enough effort where I don't look back and regret not trying. In other words when I walk away, I'm comfortable with that decision. You have to decide for yourself where that comfort level is for you.
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #3  May 24,2010, 11:06am
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Could be an old old game, drive em crazy while keeping them on the hook until eventually they're so turned around that when you do give them a nibble they're so grateful they thank you for the torture.
A lot of men and women play that, bit of a waste of time, it's an instant goodbye from me.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #4  May 24,2010, 12:41pm

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She's playin' you like a fiddle.
 
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howardtheduck is offline howardtheduck Post #5  May 24,2010, 5:42pm
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A cheap fiddle. How well tuned are you?
 
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cosmicwonder is offline cosmicwonder Post #6  May 24,2010, 5:51pm
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Try a little R & R: Restist and Run.
 
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jlj_27311 is offline jlj_27311 Post #7  May 25,2010, 7:15am
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I personally think you should move on. Getting her dressed tailored? Lol, thats a first. When her best friend texted you and your still availible after six years, that made you look somewhat desperate in my opinion. Quit while its easy now, if you let something drag on thats not there, its just harder to give it up in the long run.
 
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Immerito is offline Immerito Post #8  May 28,2010, 6:11am
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jred8300 wrote :
Okay so about 6 years ago I dated this girl and things didnt work out primarly because we were both very young and inexperienced in the dating game. We dated basically over physical attraction as most young inexperienced people do. She's a very beautiful girl. But after the breakup we literally havent spoken a word to each other. Now its 6 years later and about a week ago her best friend texts me and tells me that she wants to get with me. So we begin talking and things were going well. A couple days later she came to my basketball game and we hung out after. We went to her best friends house and were just chilling and watched a movie. During the movie she was tired and fell asleep on top of me. The chemistry seemed great. The next morining I bought her breafast and decided to just ask her out. She said, "Maybe." probably to play a little hard to get but I think this was a mistake by me by asking her out so quickly. Then the next friday we were planning on hanging out during the morning and afternoon hours because she had to work that night. Turns out that she couldnt hang out because she said, "I have to get my dress tailored." Prior to this day she made no comment of any such task. So in my head in saying OK whatever. Then she proposed to go to the movies that sunday and that didnt happen either. Now I dont understand what shes trying to do. I know she likes me. She calls me babe and told me I was "Madd Cute." Did I screw up something along the way or is she playing mind games because I really do like her a lot
Problems:

1) Best Friend texts you to communicate Ex-Girlfriend's interest. When most people leave junior high, they stop playing such games and communicate their interest like adults. By accepting this part of the game, you indicated that you are willing to accept a junior-high level relationship.

2) Any girl who says "maybe" to going out with you is not ready for a long term relationship with you. Again, you have accepted the game that she's playing.

3) Make real plans for something to do, not just "hang out."

4) "I have to get my dress tailored" is another version of "I have to wash my hair". Translation, she's not into you.

I suspect that you and she were sexually intimate at some point recently. She's giving you loud and clear messages that she's not interested in you. I don't care how many timse she calls you "Babe" or "Madd (sic) Cute". Real women put more into their relationships than cutesy nicknames. They do special things to please their beloved. They treat him with respect. They don't cancel dates for asinine reasons.

And frankly, she realllly sounds like the Drama Llama type. Move on. Don't feed the Drama Llama. She doesn't sound like she has matured past the junior high level in the past six years, and she's probably not going to change (unless she chooses to change on her own.)

There are plenty of grounded, down to earth high school girls (I'm assuming you're in high school, because these sort of relationship games sound VERY young). Get to know one.
 
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