Not Enough of a Manly Man?


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DivorcedDad is offline DivorcedDad Post #1  May 21,2010, 8:07pm
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I had an unusual past experience dating that I wanted to share.

I went out with a fun and somewhat interesting woman a few times and things seemed like they were going okay; not great but good enough to keep dating to see if anything developed. On date #6 we were having a drink and getting ready to call it a night and my date started to get that "we need to talk" look on her face. After a few minutes I asked her what she was thinking about and she just came out and said "I don't think I could date someone who doesn't change the oil in his own car." Of all the things I thought she might be thinking about; that definitely wasn't one of them! I think I told her jokingly that changing oil might mess up my manicured nails and left it at that.

Now, to add a little perspective, I am an attorney and my date is a professional woman. I actually did change the oil and do other work on cars when I was probably 17 or 18 years old but don't see myself doing that now, especially when the Twelve Minute Lube will do it for you for $19.95 and save you spending hours at the sink with Lava soap to get your hands clean.

I just wonder if a man not changing the oil in his car has become a dealbreaker for a lot of women in today's dating world?
 
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Northern_Gal is offline Northern_Gal Post #2  May 21,2010, 8:12pm
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wow. lol. ummm - no...I suppose she must just be the kind of woman who HAS to have a man who likes to do that kind of thing...I personally never had a problem whether the man I was dating enjoyed "mechanicing" or not. Honestly, never crossed my mind that it was a deal-breaker. huh. My ex-husband was a mechanic, my last boyfriend never changed the oil in his car in his life.
Last edited by Northern_Gal; May 21,2010 at 8:13pm. Reason: clarification
 
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singinggirl is offline singinggirl Post #3  May 21,2010, 8:15pm
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Not a dealbreaker for me. In fact, I don't think I know anyone, man or woman, who changes their own oil anymore.
 
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AndieIsMe is online now AndieIsMeAdvice Member-Moderator Post #4  May 21,2010, 8:22pm
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I don't need a man that changes the oil on his car, but one that CAN if he had to. I know a ton of guys that may have been super handy like that at one time but due to their jobs (like yours) needed to pick and choose which of those things they were going to keep doing, if any.

Take it as a blessing that she let you go now.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #5  May 21,2010, 8:45pm
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i think the changing oil statement was metaphorical as you probably did based on your thread title.

there are plenty of other ways to demonstrate that one is a manly man than oil changing type things, thats for sure!
 
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Irishlass68 is offline Irishlass68 Post #6  May 21,2010, 8:56pm
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What? Thats a silly reason. My own father doesn't change the oil. He is not embarrassed to pay someone to do it and niether am I. If a guy can change the oil thats fine but if he doesn't it doesn't make him less of a man.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #7  May 21,2010, 9:07pm

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DivorcedDad wrote :
I had an unusual past experience dating that I wanted to share.

I went out with a fun and somewhat interesting woman a few times and things seemed like they were going okay; not great but good enough to keep dating to see if anything developed. On date #6 we were having a drink and getting ready to call it a night and my date started to get that "we need to talk" look on her face. After a few minutes I asked her what she was thinking about and she just came out and said "I don't think I could date someone who doesn't change the oil in his own car." Of all the things I thought she might be thinking about; that definitely wasn't one of them! I think I told her jokingly that changing oil might mess up my manicured nails and left it at that.

Now, to add a little perspective, I am an attorney and my date is a professional woman. I actually did change the oil and do other work on cars when I was probably 17 or 18 years old but don't see myself doing that now, especially when the Twelve Minute Lube will do it for you for $19.95 and save you spending hours at the sink with Lava soap to get your hands clean.

I just wonder if a man not changing the oil in his car has become a dealbreaker for a lot of women in today's dating world?
You dodged the bullet on that. I'm with ya on the $19.95 Jiffy Lube thing.

Hope date #6 is the last date for you guys.
 
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Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54Advice Official Moderator Post #8  May 21,2010, 9:39pm
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I'm impressed that you were able to perceive that "we need to have a talk" look on her face, and even more impressed that you then asked her "what are you thinking about?"

That's on my must-have list!
 
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Avalon1k is offline Avalon1k Post #9  May 21,2010, 10:34pm
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At that point you should have pulled out your club hit her in the head and carried her out.





Nah....she would probably press charges and sue you........
 
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AndieIsMe is online now AndieIsMeAdvice Member-Moderator Post #10  May 21,2010, 11:42pm
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Avalon1k wrote :
At that point you should have pulled out your club hit her in the head and carried her out.





Nah....she would probably press charges and sue you........
No, she would have accused him of not being sensitive enough.
 
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