lucas7419 is offline lucas7419 Post #1  May 20,2010, 7:19am
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Do nice guys ever win? There are still some out there that are generally interested in you because of who you are and not just how you look. Some of us were raised with some of the "old school" values. Just curious on your thoughts (kind of a survey)
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #2  May 20,2010, 7:37am

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depends on your definition of "nice".

If you mean passive aggressive, needy, manipulative, who proclaims he is nice loudly and defensively and acts like a underappreicated martyr....then no, they don't win in my book.
 
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lucas7419 is offline lucas7419 Post #3  May 20,2010, 7:41am
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scarlet13 wrote :
depends on your definition of "nice".

If you mean passive aggressive, needy, manipulative, who proclaims he is nice loudly and defensively and acts like a underappreicated martyr....then no, they don't win in my book.
Definition of a nice guy is someone who actually listens to you and isn't just interested in you physically. Opens doors for you. Wants to learn what makes you tick and what you are passionate about. And wants to share what he is passionate about with you. Understands you two are different and doesn't want to change any of that because that is what attracted the two of you to each other. So no nothing above what you said. Hope that descibes a bit more
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #4  May 20,2010, 7:45am
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"There are still some out there that are generally interested in you because of who you are and not just how you look. Some of us were raised with some of the "old school" values."

Correction OP, not some but the absolute grand majority. If you are being rejected, it's not because of that.
 
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ForwardUntoDawn is online now ForwardUntoDawn Post #5  May 20,2010, 7:47am
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scarlet13 wrote :
depends on your definition of "nice".

If you mean passive aggressive, needy, manipulative, who proclaims he is nice loudly and defensively and acts like a underappreicated martyr....then no, they don't win in my book.
She has a point, and even if your not anything above, you run the risk of being grouped as that that any ways .
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #6  May 20,2010, 7:52am

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lucas7419 wrote :
Definition of a nice guy is someone who actually listens to you and isn't just interested in you physically. Opens doors for you. Wants to learn what makes you tick and what you are passionate about. And wants to share what he is passionate about with you. Understands you two are different and doesn't want to change any of that because that is what attracted the two of you to each other. So no nothing above what you said. Hope that descibes a bit more
personally, a guy opening doors for me does not give me any insight into if he is a decent person or not.

bottom line, don't worry about being "nice" just be real. and a good man.

 
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ThePriestess is offline ThePriestess Post #7  May 20,2010, 7:55am
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lucas7419 wrote :
Definition of a nice guy is someone who actually listens to you and isn't just interested in you physically. Opens doors for you. Wants to learn what makes you tick and what you are passionate about. And wants to share what he is passionate about with you. Understands you two are different and doesn't want to change any of that because that is what attracted the two of you to each other.
None of this is indicative of "nice" on its own. Intention is everything ... there are plenty of guys who do these things as a means of manipulation.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  May 20,2010, 7:58am
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Girls like "bad boys".
 
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ForwardUntoDawn is online now ForwardUntoDawn Post #9  May 20,2010, 7:59am
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try being respectable guy instead
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #10  May 20,2010, 8:00am

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ThePriestess wrote :
None of this is indicative of "nice" on its own. Intention is everything ... there are plenty of guys who do these things as a means of manipulation.
yep.

anyway, I expect the guys i date to be nice... it's like expecting the car you buy to come with tires. if he wasn't nice, I wouldnt be going out with him.
 
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