borncountry83 is offline borncountry83 Post #1  May 18,2010, 8:09pm
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I have been on a few dates in the past 6 months, and the first date goes great. The whole night we are talking and having fun. So we arrange a second date, and it starts good then half way through the night I feel the energy die. I keep trying different things and each time it ends with no third date.

I need some advice on keep it exciting on the second date?
help
 
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penpen2 is offline penpen2 Post #2  May 18,2010, 9:21pm
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Don't think about it that much... just let things flow. It's really hard to get past the first date, so you're doing something right.

I'd suggest maybe not having such long dates. When you sense the energy will start to die, end the date early and ask her about continuing further on the third date. :P

Good luck!
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #3  May 19,2010, 12:47am
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How easy do you generally find making conversation? Are you the type who can talk about anything to anyone?
One thing i've noticed is that if a first date goes fabulously then people who perhaps don't suffer from verbal incontinence the way i do run out of things to say on a second date because they said it all on the first and are paranoid about repeating themselves or appearing boring, they just sit there feeling self conscious until the date fizzles its way to the end because they can't recapture the dynamic of the first date.
 
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iamgermajesty is offline iamgermajesty Post #4  May 19,2010, 2:48am
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I think it's a good idea to DO something on a date, rather than just sit down for dinner or a coffee. Sure, this is a good plan for the first date, but by the second, you should have some idea of each other's interests.

Then go wander around an art gallery or go to a shooting range or pan for gold - anything! Something where you aren't just sitting across from each other at a table where the conversation has the potential to die. That way, you can talk about what you're doing or seeing rather than having to come up with topics from nowhere.

Even a movie date would work if you go for an ice cream afterward and talk about the movie.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #5  May 19,2010, 6:30am
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As penpen2 said it is hard to get a second date so you must be doing something right on the first date.

iamgermajesty has an excellent suggestion that you should plan some sort of activity for the second and more dates.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #6  May 19,2010, 7:17am
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I'll also vote for try to include some kind of an activity for the second date and try to organize it in a way that the date has a natural time limit so that the date ends before you both run out of energy and conversation topics. Ending the date on a high note is more important than hanging about until things fizzle out.
 
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SaginPhx is offline SaginPhx Post #7  May 19,2010, 1:35pm
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My advice is that you have to be aware of your own emotions when you are on a date with a woman. If you aren't "in the moment" and thinking about this or that, or something should be this way or that way. A woman will pick up on that and she will feel detached or feel as if you are not into her. If it's a pattern like you say, I would pay attention to how you are feeling in any moment on a date and not so much what you are doing or saying. Just stay in the moment and you will find out that women will respond much more favorably to you. I had to find that out the hard way myself.

On a deeper level it could also just be a unconscious protective mechanism on your part to avoid being hurt by taking it to a deeper level.
 
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borncountry83 is offline borncountry83 Post #8  May 19,2010, 4:33pm
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gothustartus hit the nail on the head, that is what is happening

I will try to plan shorter dates and I like the idea of being aware of my emotions

thankyou for the great advice
 
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