CH2010 is offline CH2010 Post #1  May 15,2010, 5:30pm
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I've been doing this online thing for about 3 months, with no luck until now. But, finally I have 2 potentially great matches to meet this weekend. Have been communicating with the first for about a month, scheduling issues prevented us from meeting sooner. The second one has only been in communication for a little over a week.

I just met the first one for drinks, which lasted 4 hours. We made plans to see each other next weekend and he's already texted me to see if I got home ok and to say that he really enjoyed meeting me. I know how this works and I know there's a huge chance he'll just poof, but I REALLY like him. How can I keep from getting too excited too soon? I have to admit, I'm already doing it!!

The other issue is that I'm meeting #2 tomorrow for drinks, but I'm really not excited about this meeting, especially now. Do I go anyway and try to make the best of it? I was already having doubts about this one, but he seems really, really nice and is very eager to meet.

I know I need to keep my "options" open, but I'm really not good at that. I prefer to focus on one at a time, but I do need to get control of myself, so I don't build this up too much too soon.

Also, just want to say that neither of these 2 profiles were that great and I really wasn't that excited about today's meeting, but I went and it was so much better than I had imagined. So, I will definitely try to be more open in the future as to profiles, which I would have previously dismissed. It's so hard to see the real person behind a profile.

Any advice?
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  May 15,2010, 5:37pm
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CH2010 wrote :
I just met the first one for drinks, which lasted 4 hours. We made plans to see each other next weekend and he's already texted me to see if I got home ok and to say that he really enjoyed meeting me. I know how this works and I know there's a huge chance he'll just poof, but I REALLY like him. How can I keep from getting too excited too soon?

Find something else to do, such as attending a Fun motorcycle race or constructing a one-third scale replica of a Chance-Vought F4U Corsair.

Failing that, ask him out for meeting number two. Which is a good idea, anyway.


CH2010 wrote :
The other issue is that I'm meeting #2 tomorrow for drinks, but I'm really not excited about this meeting, especially now. Do I go anyway and try to make the best of it? I was already having doubts about this one, but he seems really, really nice and is very eager to meet.

I do not personally have multiple partners in play, however one meeting is a small number indeed to foreclose all other possible options.

I favor meeting this person.
 
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NYCpigeon is offline NYCpigeon Post #3  May 15,2010, 5:42pm
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I think you should definitely go out with guy #2.

I think it's great that you had a nice time with guy #1, but you really don't know what will transpire in the weeks to come. People can be very flaky.

How do you keep your emotions in check? Come here everyday and read some of the sob stories.

Good luck.
 
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CH2010 is offline CH2010 Post #4  May 15,2010, 6:12pm
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D_Lion wrote :
Find something else to do, such as attending a Fun motorcycle race or constructing a one-third scale replica of a Chance-Vought F4U Corsair.

Failing that, ask him out for meeting number two. Which is a good idea, anyway.





I do not personally have multiple partners in play, however one meeting is a small number indeed to foreclose all other possible options.

I favor meeting this person.
I don't want to foreclose on all other possibilities, just wish that I could space this out some. I agree I just need to go, suck it up, and do the best that I can. Afterall, it's pretty hard to believe that I have 2 meetings in one weekend, what are the odds that I'd actually be interested in both??
 
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CH2010 is offline CH2010 Post #5  May 15,2010, 6:16pm
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NYCpigeon wrote :
I think you should definitely go out with guy #2.

I think it's great that you had a nice time with guy #1, but you really don't know what will transpire in the weeks to come. People can be very flaky.

How do you keep your emotions in check? Come here everyday and read some of the sob stories.

Good luck.

I know, I can be pretty flaky too. That's what worries me. I've read the stories and lived through it some too.
 
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juliamarie is offline juliamarie Post #6  May 15,2010, 6:16pm
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Good luck, CH!
 
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ravitaekwondo is offline ravitaekwondo Post #7  May 15,2010, 6:30pm
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Hi there OP,

Congrats on getting those dates!!! Guy #1 seems like a good one, I mean he texted you, and you have plans. What makes you think he will poof???

I would say keep your date with the second guy. You never know what turns out.

But, make it clear to whoever you are seeing in the beginning, you are keeping your options open until you decide to become exclusive. Please don't be like one of the other people who waited until the 8th date to tell the poor guy she was dating others.

Let us know how things work out!!! All the best!!!
 
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CH2010 is offline CH2010 Post #8  May 15,2010, 6:39pm
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ravitaekwondo wrote :
Hi there OP,

Congrats on getting those dates!!! Guy #1 seems like a good one, I mean he texted you, and you have plans. What makes you think he will poof???

I would say keep your date with the second guy. You never know what turns out.

But, make it clear to whoever you are seeing in the beginning, you are keeping your options open until you decide to become exclusive. Please don't be like one of the other people who waited until the 8th date to tell the poor guy she was dating others.

Let us know how things work out!!! All the best!!!

Thanks, I'm just one of those assume the worst and hope for the best people. I just don't want to get my hopes up only to be let down.

He's actually texted me 3 more times since I first posted, so I think this is a good sign, but like the others said, people are flaky and you just never know.

I'm definitely not the one to wait until the 8th date to have that conversation. I'm just not one of those that can date multiple people. I know everyone says that is not the way to do it, but that's just me. I feel bad even going tomorrow knowing that I'm not really into it and I don't want to hurt the guy's feelings (even if #1 doesn't work out).
 
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ravitaekwondo is offline ravitaekwondo Post #9  May 15,2010, 7:08pm
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Hey there once again OP,

No need to feel bad....have you had much communication with this guy, as in text/chat/phone calls/e-mail? Remember with this online stuff, people are different when you meet them for the first time. There was one match, based on her pictures (yes, I know this sounds shallow!!) i was not totally into, but we sent great e-mails. Then when we met in person, she looked totally different...she looked beautiful and a lot younger than the eH pix.

Right now, you have nothing invested with this new guy. Go in with an open mind, relax, and be yourself. Although you really can't get to know somebody on the first date, you can get a sense if you clicked or not. If things go great, get plans set up for a second date. If things don't go the way you want them to, then communicate that with him.

Just go in and have fun!!! I am sure you're gonna do great!!!! Remember think positive!!!

Yea, I am not the type to multiple date either. Usually after the third date or so, i remain focused with that one person, whether exclusitivity has been declared or not. I have been on eH since 2006, have something like 3,300 closed matches, have not had a date in two months, but I am still positive!!! :)

Let us know how things go!
 
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FruitaBu is offline FruitaBu Post #10  May 16,2010, 8:34am
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You should definitely see guy #2. He may surprise you and be even better than guy #1! I would advise keeping all options open until the initial excitement wears off and everyone is operating with a clear mind. Like you said... people are flaky!
 
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