Who Pays? Men, I have something to say to you.


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notyet is offline notyet Post #1  April 24,2010, 8:26pm
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i haven't been on a date in a while or dated anyone regularly for quite some time. but i've been thinking (dangerous, i know).

guys- if you are so petty that it bothers you that the lady is not paying or offering to pay occasionally and carrying her fair financial share, you are not emotionally mature enough for a relationship.

further, if you do not have the money to pay for the dates and so rely on her to help defray the costs, you are not settled or established enough to be able to handle a relationship.

now, i am not here saying that the lady must not pay. if she insists, let her. but if you require her to "share the load" or do not have the resources to pay for your planned outings- get a second job, go back to school and earn a useful degree, or put in longer hours at work in order to advance your career until you have the money to date without burdening the subject of your romantic interest.

feel free to disagree.
 
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ThePriestess is online now ThePriestess Post #2  April 24,2010, 8:29pm
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Yet again.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #3  April 24,2010, 8:30pm

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notyet wrote :
i haven't been on a date in a while or dated anyone regularly for quite some time. but i've been thinking (dangerous, i know).

guys- if you are so petty that it bothers you that the lady is not paying or offering to pay occasionally and carrying her fair financial share, you are not emotionally mature enough for a relationship.

further, if you do not have the money to pay for the dates and so rely on her to help defray the costs, you are not settled or established enough to be able to handle a relationship.

now, i am not here saying that the lady must not pay. if she insists, let her. but if you require her to "share the load" or do not have the resources to pay for your planned outings- get a second job, go back to school and earn a useful degree, or put in longer hours at work in order to advance your career until you have the money to date without burdening the subject of your romantic interest.

feel free to disagree.
Welcome to ehA!
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #4  April 24,2010, 8:32pm
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Wow.


Hmmm......


No comment. (at this time)
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #5  April 24,2010, 8:33pm
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PY_2 wrote :
Welcome to ehA!
You do realize he's been on eH Advice longer than you, don't you, PY?
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #6  April 24,2010, 8:34pm
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ThePriestess wrote :
Yet again.
yeah, well... i had not chimed in on the other thread(s).
Last edited by notyet; April 24,2010 at 8:52pm. Reason: just wanted to stress the multipleness of it all...
 
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hankscorpio is offline hankscorpio Post #7  April 24,2010, 8:39pm

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notyet wrote :
i haven't been on a date in a while or dated anyone regularly for quite some time. but i've been thinking (dangerous, i know).

guys- if you are so petty that it bothers you that the lady is not paying or offering to pay occasionally and carrying her fair financial share, you are not emotionally mature enough for a relationship.

further, if you do not have the money to pay for the dates and so rely on her to help defray the costs, you are not settled or established enough to be able to handle a relationship.

now, i am not here saying that the lady must not pay. if she insists, let her. but if you require her to "share the load" or do not have the resources to pay for your planned outings- get a second job, go back to school and earn a useful degree, or put in longer hours at work in order to advance your career until you have the money to date without burdening the subject of your romantic interest.

feel free to disagree.
Oh man - one of these threads! Let me add one!


Okay, guys, You should never worry whether a woman reciprocates any interest in you. If you don't have the CONFIDENCE and SELF ESTEEM to just tirelessly carry a wet blanket around while being completely self assured that she wants a real adult's relationship with you even if she's never given any indication or reciprocation of your feelings.

If you just can't handle a woman who is secure enough with herself to play it coy and close to the vest then you should stop wasting time dating and go hang out with your mother for a while so she can stroke your ego and tell you what a great person you are until you're ready for a real relationship.
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #8  April 24,2010, 8:44pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
You do realize he's been on eH Advice longer than you, don't you, PY?
actually, py predates me by about a month. it is good to have him back again.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #9  April 24,2010, 8:44pm

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AndieIsMe wrote :
You do realize he's been on eH Advice longer than you, don't you, PY?
I do! Doesn't mean I can't be friendly and welcome him again!

(I just saw notyet's post...I didn't know about the month earlier thing)
Last edited by PY_2; April 24,2010 at 8:51pm. Reason: btw...welcome Andie!
 
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ThePriestess is online now ThePriestess Post #10  April 24,2010, 8:45pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
You do realize he's been on eH Advice longer than you, don't you, PY?
And yet ...
 
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