Dear Blue_Angel,

You ask a great question many wonder about! Here's how I solved it with a match, though I should provide the caveat we'd gotten to be good friends over 8 1/2 months before we met over 8 1/2 - yes, that's another story I wrote about it another thread, the name I can't remember.

Anyway, we were talking on the phone as he drove into the drive . . . We were discussing what we'd do when we met and decided to hug as he was getting out of his vehicle. We were good friends and it was just completely natural!

I had some of his favorite foods ready, and it was like meeting someone I'd known for years and felt completely comfortable with!

Now with another man who I didn't know that well, it seemed more appropriate to shake hands with him and it didn't seem awkward at all. It was nice too and a hug with him would have felt forced. I'm a very warm person, but not everyone is. Some are just not huggers and need a bit to warm up toa match and their physical presence.

Yes, go ahead and "read" him. I'm highly intuitive and perceptive and that's what I do. It's always stood me in good stead and I've never regretted how I've met with a person and what I did at the moment of meeting.

Now the man I mentioned about who Ishook hands with when we met isa Christian like I am and so when we set down to eat I said, "Would you like to say the blessing or shall I?" He said he would and I responded by saying, "My family has always been in the custom of holding hands when we pray would that be OK?" and gently put my hands over his that were resting on the table. I could tell he liked it!

There's ways to be warm but be careful, as the above poster mentioned, because you don't want to be too encouraging if you'd not like another date. That will only confuse your match if your manner is rather warm and encouraging, but you decline a second date, either then if he asks, or later if he calls. Always be polite of course. You don't ever want to send mixed signals.

You'll figure it out! Don't fret about it. You sound like you'll be able to read his body language and will do just the right thing for the both of you! If he holds out his arms you'll know; likewise if he holds out his hand. If he does nothing, then it's up to you and how well you know him and how encouraging you want to be, not knowing yet how things will go.

Have fun and let us know what you decide to do! Really, I don't see how you can go much wrong either way!

JavaJava5