Just Friends or Dating?


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sprklnbliz is offline sprklnbliz Post #1  January 30,2010, 8:43pm
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I reconnected with a friend from college on Facebook. We had not talked in about 15 years; since we each graduated. We have both been single again for about two years. By chance we now live about 20 minutes apart. We emailed a few times. I suggested that we should get together sometime and sent him my cell number. We talked about three times for an hour each time before the date. He wanted to come pick me up instead of us meeting. We had a nice meal. It was great to see him and again we talked nonstop about past, present and future. He insisted on paying when the check came. He was a gentleman all evening - opening doors, etc. Years ago he wouldn't have done those things. At the end of the night, he told me he wanted us to do this again and that he would give me a call.

We each have dated other people since we have been single again. We both know what we want in a relationship (almost identical). He is a good man, Past and present knowledge taken into consideration.

I'm not sure that he will come out and tell me he is interested though he might surprise me. Yet, I don't want to be forward and make a move if he only wants to be friends.

I know it is early on I just want to tread carefully so that I don't blow him off as just being a friend and not giving the relationship a chance.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #2  January 30,2010, 8:46pm

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Just enjoy it and take it one meeting at a time.
 
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BubblyGirliGirl is offline BubblyGirliGirl Post #3  January 30,2010, 8:48pm
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Agreed. Enjoy re-aquainting and see what happens.
 
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RoxyRedhead is offline RoxyRedhead Post #4  January 30,2010, 9:02pm

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In late 2009 TIME magazine had a long article about the reconnecting on Face Book phenomena that has been hitting the US...you might want to do a web search and read it.

Basically there were a lot of high hopes and a lot of disappointed people when reality set in.

We change a lot in 15 years-

I'd treat it just like a date with a stranger that is a bit more comfortable because you have things to talk about. However have no expectations based on your past.

Hope it works out for you but remember, Have Fun!
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #5  January 30,2010, 11:03pm
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Reconnectiong with someone from your past is great, but be careful not to read more into it than is there, you might think of your meetings as dates but he might be thinking of them as hanging out, it sounds like you won't know which they are unless you actually ask him and if you don't get the answer you're looking for then that can be pretty crushing, depending on how much you've invested in it emotionally.
 
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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #6  January 30,2010, 11:03pm
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sprklnbliz wrote :
I'm not sure that he will come out and tell me he is interested though he might surprise me. Yet, I don't want to be forward and make a move if he only wants to be friends.
Let's see... he took you out, paid for it, and said he wanted to see you again.

I don't think he's interested.

What does he have to do, put up a billboard?
 
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dadist is offline dadist Post #7  January 31,2010, 4:30am
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mrflyer wrote :
Let's see... he took you out, paid for it, and said he wanted to see you again.

I don't think he's interested.

What does he have to do, put up a billboard?
I wouldn't read anything into that I do that all the time with friends.
 
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CapnCrunch23 is offline CapnCrunch23 Post #8  January 31,2010, 4:49am

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PY_2 wrote :
Just enjoy it and take it one meeting at a time.
What Noodles said:

Maybe he'll ask you to the Prom!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  January 31,2010, 6:21am
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It seems that you have a good start here. But it is still early on.

You don't say what your relationship was in college. If was just casual friends that may be all he is seeing here. If he saw you from a more romantic viewpoint back then, then maybe he is hoping to rekindle that into a fire this time around.
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #10  January 31,2010, 8:17am

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dadist wrote :
I wouldn't read anything into that I do that all the time with friends.
I agree. I do the same thing too with friends so that does not mean anything.

***

I would just act as two old acquaintances meeting again and leave the relationship type feelings out of it for now. See where it takes you. Good luck.
 
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