We are "exclusive" but not "official," just "talking - How long should I stick around?


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RocklinGirl82 is offline RocklinGirl82 Post #1  January 8,2010, 7:18pm
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Last edited by RocklinGirl82; March 7,2012 at 5:49pm. Reason: Trying to delete
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  January 8,2010, 7:24pm
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You have had only two dates, or what?

I've always found "girlfriend" immature, and prefer something different when referring to an adult.

If being exclusive is what you seek, and he promised this (and appears to be holding to that promise), what's the problem?
 
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goosielucy is offline goosielucy Post #3  January 8,2010, 7:32pm
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Just out of curiosity, I am wondering what you mean by "talking" and "going steady" and "official". You've had two dates. I don't think either of you are ready for the wedding aisle.

I would think by three months of regular dating, then you can begin to view eachother as a couple, that's if you both agree that you are.
 
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RocklinGirl82 is offline RocklinGirl82 Post #4  January 8,2010, 7:35pm
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D_Lion wrote :
You have had only two dates, or what?
No actually...have gone out a number of times...met each other familes, spent new years together, etc.

D_Lion wrote :
I've always found "girlfriend" immature, and prefer something different when referring to an adult.
Yes, but it implies some more serious than just "talking", which seems to be very temporary. I guess I'm looking for him to see me in his future & to let me know whether this could be moving towards something long term.

D_Lion wrote :
If being exclusive is what you seek, and he promised this (and appears to be holding to that promise), what's the problem?
Yes, to the best of my knowledge we are still exclusive, so no problem there. Again, just looking for something more solid...perhaps I am rushing things?
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #5  January 8,2010, 7:36pm
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From your previous thread, it sounds to me like you have been seeing each other for only one month, so pushing for girlfriend status at this point would seem, well, really pushy. Let the relationship go at the pace that is comfortable for you both, meaning for the slowest person.

It sounds like you aren't even at the point yet of just calling him up to chat because you feel like it yet--and he has initiated everything in your dating. When you arrive to the comfort of a relationship that merits bf/gf status, you will be initiating communication and seeing each other too without thinking about it.
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #6  January 8,2010, 7:38pm
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RocklinGirl82 wrote :
...met each other familes, spent new years together, etc.
This is a good indication of the direction things could be heading (positive).
RocklinGirl82 wrote :
...perhaps I am rushing things?
Yes.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  January 8,2010, 7:39pm
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You ought to be able to communicate your goals to your partner.

He ought to be able to do so too ... and both should be honest.

A few meetings over a couple of months, I guess? - does not provide a basis for attachment.

I don't see any problem. If you are what he is looking for, I would give the situation more time.
 
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RocklinGirl82 is offline RocklinGirl82 Post #8  January 8,2010, 7:39pm
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goosielucy wrote :
Just out of curiosity, I am wondering what you mean by "talking" and "going steady" and "official". You've had two dates. I don't think either of you are ready for the wedding aisle.
Sorry, should have made it more clear...we have gone on a number of dates & hung out together many times over the past 4 weeks.

The term "talking" is what he uses...as opposed to what I don't know...I think most people would call that dating?
 
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goosielucy is offline goosielucy Post #9  January 8,2010, 7:49pm
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He calls what you and he are to one anotehr and what you are doing as "talking"? That makes no sense to me, sorry.

For now, it sounds very much like you are dating, that's it.

I hope it works out.
 
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RocklinGirl82 is offline RocklinGirl82 Post #10  January 8,2010, 7:52pm
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goosielucy wrote :
He calls what you and he are to one anotehr and what you are doing as "talking"? That makes no sense to me, sorry.
His term, not mine. I believe it means to him that we are doing just that...talking & getting to know each other. Which is dating, right? Gosh, now I'm confused. Haha.
 
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