Is it weird to confirm a first meet?


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joeyjoe is offline joeyjoe Post #1  January 6,2010, 11:52pm
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Meeting someone in the Greenwich for dinner tonight. We've not e-mailed since Monday. I have her number, she has mine. Should I call a few hours earlier or just show up? Never been stood up yet, but I am usually pretty on the ball with things. Most of the girls, well ALL of them have been LATE. One 45 minutes late.
 
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richey is offline richey Post #2  January 7,2010, 12:50am
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Yeah I think it's okay (especially since you haven't been in contact all week) to send a text or call to say, "we're still on right? looking forward to dinner" reminder.

If she responds.. cool.. you know.

If she doesn't... up to you whether you still want to show up (I wouldn't).

If you do show up and she's late ~ dude, give it a time limit that you will tolerate and leave. (I usually give it 20-30 mins tops). Reason I say this is, if she is VERY late and hasn't contacted you to let you know.... and she still finds you there. You can kiss any respect for you goodbye (knowing she can be as disrespectful and inconsiderate as she wants and you'll still be there).

Good luck. Greenwich... niiiiiice! infact, if she doesn't get back to you, freak... ask somebody else to dinner and hit greenwich anyway

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Sophie157 is offline Sophie157 Post #3  January 7,2010, 3:04am
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if you're going to meet, I'd expect you have exchanged phone numbers. I'd find it reasonable to confirm with her by text. As a woman though, I will say that some of us are new and hesitant to meet, it takes alot of courage sometimes, and so I'd just show up if I was you. If she doesn;t show up and she had your cell number...and did not let you know, well either she is inconsiderate, or not ready. Take the chance and just show up. If she does not show, don;t take it to heart or let it get you down - you will have given it every chance. If she contacts you and and apologizes, accept it. That is my advise, from my own perspective All the best!
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  January 7,2010, 3:22am
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I agree with Richey.

I'd find it fine to call. Don't sound like you're already afraid she's a flake, though.

It is also an easy pretext to describe what you're wearing, so she can spot you easier.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #5  January 7,2010, 6:11am
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D_Lion wrote :
I agree with Richey.

I'd find it fine to call. Don't sound like you're already afraid she's a flake, though.

It is also an easy pretext to describe what you're wearing, so she can spot you easier.
I agree with this. I would approach it as I am just making sure that I have the time and place of the meeting correct. Making sure that I have not misunderstood.

I always tell my first dates what I will be wearing and exactly where I will be meeting them. It is a lot easier to see a red shirt and black slacks from across a parking lot than it is to tell a face.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #6  January 7,2010, 6:33am
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It's not weird but it is polite, especially if you agreed several days ago and have not talked since.
 
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nightling is offline nightling Post #7  January 7,2010, 7:48am
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Always confirm. It's the polite gentlemanly thing to do. To me, it really puts the ball in her court to be considerate and let you know if she's thinking of backing out.
 
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stevex is offline stevex Post #8  January 7,2010, 8:14am
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I would call before you leave to meet up with her, tell her you on your way and looking forward to it. You haven't spoken to her since Monday so a call would be a very good idea. She will probably find it nice that you took the time to call.
 
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Mickey275 is offline Mickey275 Post #9  January 7,2010, 8:15am
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Richey is right on the money. A quick confirmation text is in order. How she takes it from there will tell you all you need to know about her. If she's worth your time, she'll appreciate your courteousness and directness and will reply to your text immediately. If no reply, take it as a bad sign. If she still shows up but is late, you also can take that as a bad sign. How you behave in the very early stages of dating sets the tone for everything that follows. If a person is courteous, respectful and honest in small matters, that person will follow suit when it comes to bigger, more important things.
 
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KungFuFtr is offline KungFuFtr Post #10  January 7,2010, 8:50am
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I guess I'm outnumbered here

I think it's weird to confirm. It sort of gives her the opportunity to flake or cancel. "Are we still up for tonight...?"

It just seems sort of weak to me, like you're asking for her permission to consider you. You asked for permission when she said yes to the date, that is enough. She is an adult and it's assumed that she will remember and stick to her plan for the date. If she forgot or needs to cancel, she can initiate the conversation.
 
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