Is it weird to confirm a first meet?


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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #11  January 7,2010, 10:16am
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I always like a confirmation text/e-mail/call. It tells me that they aren't going to flake on me. It can also help if there is confusion about place, time, etc.

That being said, KungFu, we are adults, but it is still the wooing period, so show the girls out there a little more luv.
 
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richey is offline richey Post #12  January 7,2010, 2:03pm
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No, confirming isn't really asking the person if they're still interested, it's more of a reminder shot and making final arrangements/confirmation so you don't miss each other. So it shouldn't be seen as a "last chance to flake".

But even so, if they do flake out ~ wasn't it better to know and lose the date and not waste the time? Then to not confirm and be stood up or find out they are a totally inconsiderate person?

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yoga_gal is offline yoga_gal Post #13  January 7,2010, 2:31pm
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Confirming if we haven't talked/emailed for a couple of days is fine. However, it should be quick and not a blow by blow rundown of your progress on the way to the date. I once had a guy confirm and then tell me he was leaving, text me how traffic was moving, text me he arrived. I had more info than his GPS. Very annoying.
 
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peg099 is offline peg099 Post #14  January 7,2010, 3:35pm
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KungFuFtr wrote :
I guess I'm outnumbered here

I think it's weird to confirm. It sort of gives her the opportunity to flake or cancel. "Are we still up for tonight...?"
You don't have to say "Are we still on for tonight?". You can simply say "I'm just confirming that we're meeting at location X at time Y.``

I also like the idea of using that as an opportunity to tell the other person what you`ll be wearing. That way you`re also providing additional info and being considerate (i.e. making it a little easier and less nerve-racking for her to identify you.)
 
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DDjr is offline DDjr Post #15  January 7,2010, 6:27pm
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(Most of you know me from my other disguise as a texting hater but...)

I think in today's society of ubiquitous mobile phones (& texting capability), that a quick text of "see you in a couple of hours" (or whatever the horrific decimation of English that would actual cross the air) would be appropriate.
 
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gcoleman99 is offline gcoleman99 Post #16  January 7,2010, 6:41pm
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DDjr wrote :
(Most of you know me from my other disguise as a texting hater but...)

I think in today's society of ubiquitous mobile phones (& texting capability), that a quick text of "see you in a couple of hours" (or whatever the horrific decimation of English that would actual cross the air) would be appropriate.
...especially if one hasn't communicated in over 1/2 week. I always confirm, even if I've spoken to them the day before (in those cases, I'll text a couple of hours before something like "see you tonight."
 
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joeyjoe is offline joeyjoe Post #17  January 7,2010, 10:01pm
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Just going to send a fast text. If she does not respond, then I guess she changed her mind.
 
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nightling is offline nightling Post #18  January 8,2010, 1:45am
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joeyjoe wrote :
Just going to send a fast text. If she does not respond, then I guess she changed her mind.
Why would you assume that? The wording doesn't really seem to require a response.

I mean my dentist sends me voicemail confirmations I never reply to those, nor do I usually get a chance to reply to a lot of other confirmations I get through the course of a day bc I'm out and about and not taking messages during an interview or appointment with someone else.

I think you are assuming way too much ... only be a no show if she says she's changed her mind!
Last edited by nightling; January 8,2010 at 1:48am.
 
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shoopthedoop is offline shoopthedoop Post #19  January 8,2010, 7:18am
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I personally don't confirm in advance, but I won't schedule a specific place and time that far in advance.

If I'm setting up a date a week or more in advance, I'll usually just pick a night and general time. Then a couple days before I'll confirm a place and time. So I guess that is sorta, kinda, confirming a first meeting...
 
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