Lying about his age

olneyjeeps, there is more that he did that bugged me. Even things that I said, "no, that isn't OK." and he still did them. For example, he asked if he could touch my hair. I said, "thank you for asking, that is something I'm not comfortable with." And then 10 minutes later he is doing just that!

And on calling him out, there are appropriate times/places to say, "wow, you lied about your age? You're a jerk!" (Ok, so I wouldn't say it like that.) In a crowded bar where others can hear you is not one. I know if I had said something it would have been worse. A guy sitting next to him even commented "sounds like a first date". So, I think by taking this to a forum and figuring out a polite and correct way to say I'm not interested, without getting into the weirdness of the date, is better. I can be less than polite if I don't stop myself sometimes.

He just really annoyed me with the whole sundae thing. I had purposely walked 2 blocks to a local ice cream shop (he followed about 10 minutes later) and when he came in he just dove in. I offered him a few bites, not my entire dessert. Before that, at the brewery, he even grabbed my beer and took a few sips without asking. Sometimes people do things that you just don't know how to respond to at the time. Bad on my part? Maybe. But less so than pretending I'm something I am not.

And I only mentioned the Mensa because he made a big deal about me possibly having a prejudice about it. I DON'T. I didn't care about that. It just happens to be what he was being evasive about. It could have been the Humane Society or a Tree Climber group.... who really cares. The point is that he did not want to tell me and the way he did it was like he had a dark secret to hide. I got concerned because if he was involved with something totally against my beliefs I wanted to know. No offense to anyone in either of those groups, I love animals and trees!

nightling - I was sure to tell him that I needed something to eat before we had drinks. I didn't want to get wasted by the end of my 2nd beer with the guy! He even told me that he had stopped somewhere to grab a bite. If he had wanted to have dinner with me I would have waited, but he didn't express any interest in that. I made sure to arrive early so there wouldn't be this half eaten plate of food sitting there when he arrived. So, eating before he got there wasn't a huge deal IMO. If I had ordered and eaten in front of him, that would have been rude.

olneyjeeps

nightling - I was sure to tell him that I needed something to eat before we had drinks. I didn't want to get wasted by the end of my 2nd beer with the guy! He even told me that he had stopped somewhere to grab a bite. If he had wanted to have dinner with me I would have waited, but he didn't express any interest in that. I made sure to arrive early so there wouldn't be this half eaten plate of food sitting there when he arrived. So, eating before he got there wasn't a huge deal IMO. If I had ordered and eaten in front of him, that would have been rude.

As for the hair thing, not in any way to excuse his action, his actions could easily be classified as a juvenile form of "testing."

Wow, and I thought I screwed up by lying about my age by one year! A complete dealbreaker according to everyone on this board! But I did not interrupt her at all, paid for her drinks, opened doors, listened intently, and walked her to her car. Yet, the chick I met on Match last week will not respond to me. Sorry, don't want to hijack the thread, but I saw the age title and had to chime in after the abuse I took on here!

Actually, I was thinking about most of the bad dates I've had. Most of the horrible ones, like this one, are with guys I should have just turned down in the first place. This guy used a photo that may or may not be recent, so I thought no biggie, he grew out his hair a bit. But then he opened his mouth to tell me about his age thing. At least he came clean now and not a few dates, weeks, months or whatever from now.

There are quite a few more red flags that popped up during the night. And looking at how he behaved, how he would converse with people around us, his lack of memory on who I was and his interruption pattern, my initial thought of "flight" should have been heeded.