peppermint21 is offline peppermint21 Post #1  December 18,2009, 5:39pm
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I was talking to a friend the other day and said to her, "I love my instructor in the class I'm in right now. He's so encouraging...why doesn't someone tell men how sexy that is?"...so that's what I'm doing now.

I have the most ridiculous crush on this guy. I'm 30 years old and I practically blush talking to him (it's been YEARS since I blushed). I can't even say it's purely physical because he's beyond not the physical type I'm usually into.

Reflecting on it a bit I realized that very few of the men I've been involved with have been genuinely encouraging. I've also realized how safe it can make a woman feel, which is honestly what most of us are looking for in the first place.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  December 18,2009, 5:43pm
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That's a wonderful post!

Go on, give us another!
 
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Calm2010 is offline Calm2010 Post #3  December 18,2009, 5:48pm
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Okay I admit it D - sarcasm looks good on you.
 
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Calm2010 is offline Calm2010 Post #4  December 18,2009, 5:50pm
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Peppermint I agree with your comments. Encouragement is attractive.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #5  December 18,2009, 5:54pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Do you think that is 'sexiness'? There are many things that women can say or do that I find attractive....but many of them I wouldn't call 'sexy'. For example, I find it very attractive for a woman to act modestly, kindly or sweetly....but those things don't make me find her more 'sexy', per se.
 
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Wootz is offline Wootz Post #6  December 18,2009, 6:01pm
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It is attractive to guys, too, I assure you. Sincere, thoughtful encouragement tells us that you’re paying attention, at the very least. And more than that, it makes us feel good- everybody likes positive encouragement! It’s a good example and tends to help people act their best when it is genuine.

That said, some of us guys need all the help and encouragement we can get- any hotness tips you can give, we do appreciate!


 
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Calm2010 is offline Calm2010 Post #7  December 18,2009, 6:02pm
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I don't think it is necessarily sexy. In fact in my response to Peppermint I started to type sexy but switched it to attractive because I didn't quite think sexy fit. I think it can be a bit seductive or enticing though.
 
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roguewolf1 is offline roguewolf1 Post #8  December 18,2009, 6:35pm

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peppermint4209 wrote :
I was talking to a friend the other day and said to her, "I love my instructor in the class I'm in right now. He's so encouraging...why doesn't someone tell men how sexy that is?"...so that's what I'm doing now.

I have the most ridiculous crush on this guy. I'm 30 years old and I practically blush talking to him (it's been YEARS since I blushed). I can't even say it's purely physical because he's beyond not the physical type I'm usually into.

Reflecting on it a bit I realized that very few of the men I've been involved with have been genuinely encouraging. I've also realized how safe it can make a woman feel, which is honestly what most of us are looking for in the first place.

Thank you peppermint for this wonderful post. The man who grabs your heart will be one lucky dude
 
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fjp5 is offline fjp5 Post #9  December 18,2009, 6:39pm
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Sure, girls love guys who are patronizing ... NOT!

Bottom line, you will never be able to keep that up so just be yourself, if she finds that attractive then great, if not then it would never work anyway.
 
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peppermint21 is offline peppermint21 Post #10  December 18,2009, 7:18pm
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fjp5 wrote :
Sure, girls love guys who are patronizing ... NOT!

Bottom line, you will never be able to keep that up so just be yourself, if she finds that attractive then great, if not then it would never work anyway.
Hey...I didn't say to lie. The reason this guy's behavior stood out is actually not so much because of a lack of encouragement from other men, but instead the presence of active criticism of things I was happy about/proud of.
 
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