Need some advice please...

I'm struggling with the fact that there seems to be some elusiveness on his part. For example, if I ask how his night was or weekend, he gives a very general comment such as, "it was good" or "it was uneventful", but doesn't get into details.

He's also pretty elusive about his weekend plans and we haven't yet had a weekend date. On our date this week I asked if he wanted to do something this weekend and he said he couldn't because he was going to his parents house (an hour away) for the weekend to take his friends kids xmas shopping on Saturday. FYI, he also told me last weekend that he took this same friend's kids shopping except it was for their birthday gift.

Is being elusive about plans just par for the course when it comes to dating?

I don't want to date someone that isn't going to take me out on the weekend.

Do you think it's too soon to address this or is it better to bring this up now instead of wasting my time on him if we aren't on the same page. And what do you think I should say?

It's only been 3 dates / 3 weeks.

I think it's safe to assume that he's seeing someone else ...which is still his right to do at this point ...probably someone he met before you. I'm not sure you are "backup girl", but certainly #2 in his life ...you have to get used to it.

The problem I see here is that you are getting too attached to him too quickly. You should be out dating other people too ...not necessarily out of revenge, but to avoid "one-itis" - that's a bad thing.

Let him know you are interested in seeing him, but if he can't make a date for a weekend (for whatever reason), then you need to find something else to do.

"Don't make someone a priority who is willing to make you an option"

He may very well be out on dates with other women at these times and he may prefer being 'elusive' rather than telling you this explicitly. Leave it alone.

But, it is possible he's just not good at small talk. To test this theory, try following up with a more specific question - "How was your weekend." "It was good." "Glad to hear it. What did you do?" "Went to my parent's house." "That's nice. Did you all go out anywhere, or did you just stay home and visit? Do you visit them a lot...?" etc. You get the idea. You may have to work a little to draw him out, but try to stay pleasant and give him the benefit of the doubt at first.

I think it's safe to assume that he's seeing someone else ...which is still his right to do at this point ...probably someone he met before you. I'm not sure you are "backup girl", but certainly #2 in his life ...you have to get used to it.

The problem I see here is that you are getting too attached to him too quickly. You should be out dating other people too ...not necessarily out of revenge, but to avoid "one-itis" - that's a bad thing.

The shopping with a friend's kids is just strange. I suppose there can be a good reason but I am just not seeing it.

I think it would be a good idea to talk about your concerns. They seem valid.

How much do you like the guy? Look relationships are work and it would be great if they weren't but they probably wouldn't mean much either. Do you like the guy enough to give him the benefit of the doubt? Or do you prefer to assume the worst in guys you have been on a few dates with? Maybe he is and maybe he isn't with someone else but the point is that you don't know so in my humble opinion you shouldn't assume.

He may very well be out on dates with other women at these times and he may prefer being 'elusive' rather than telling you this explicitly. Leave it alone.

I find questions like this boring, and rapidly lose interest in hearing them. I discuss more substantive matters, decision-oriented matters, or my intents.

Personally, all my meetings are on weekends. When women make statements like this - which they do all the time - I trust them. Though, thinking about male friends, most of them would dump friends to go out with a woman.

That said, he may have some sensative or embarrassing personal issue (like parents needing some kind of assistance, that he doesn't feel comfortable discussing at this time.)

As a side note, if you have had already three meetings you should be setting some of them up. Waiting to "be asked" is a total loss of interest for me. Want to date on Saturday, invite him (you should have already.)

This attitude is a major turn-off. Spending more time, and larger blocks of time, together is a good attitude. Evaluating men on where they take you, etc, makes a day with good ol dad sound pretty appealing.

As far as I am concerned, it is never too soon to air a concern. In fact, it is always best to do so right away. I do not mind at all when a woman puts her desires clearly, so I can engage the issue.

In my view, the best thing is to set a weekend meeting yourself. If he declines, have a serious conversation where you come with your desire to spend more time and that you think he is making himself to "hard to get." As, just like for women, "hard to get" is all full of dumb.

I don't know if you should necessarily be concerned about him taking his friend's kids shopping. You may be concerned but I don't think you have the right to be concerned yet. You have only been dating for three weeks (which I am assuming means three dates).