Hybrid thread: 'baggage' and 'age'


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nightling is offline nightling Post #21  November 3,2009, 8:54pm
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Age gap relationships often do end up with the older person in a parent role.
 
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CapnCrunch23 is offline CapnCrunch23 Post #22  November 3,2009, 9:01pm

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Yup they do, been in that role
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #23  November 3,2009, 9:04pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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nightling wrote :
Age gap relationships often do end up with the older person in a parent role.
I do agree that an age gap will likely have an affect on a relationship....but I don't think this necessarily has to be negative. I've done it myself before....in both cases where I was the younger and older person.
 
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suzyque is offline suzyque Post #24  November 3,2009, 9:07pm
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I'm 43. Couple years ago, right after my divorce, I had a college student intently pursuing a relationship with me. He was 20 years younger than me. We're talking he wanted babies with me, marriage, the whole shebang. It was the wierdest thing I ever encountered. He would spend his Friday nights with the college buds playing Mystic, or Dragon Slayer or whatever the young kids play, or studying. I spent them with my 3 kids. Way, way to different of a lifestyle and I had to let him down gently. Plain simply, I would have been very embarrassed going out in public with someone who could be my son! By the way, Jay-Jay, even at his tender age, he had plenty of baggage. It WAS kind of an ego boost for someone just getting out of a divorce though!
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #25  November 3,2009, 9:12pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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suzyque wrote :
He would spend his Friday nights with the college buds playing Mystic, or Dragon Slayer or whatever the young kids play...
I don't know if he qualified as having baggage....sounds more like just weird. But it may come down to one's definition of baggage (as I think Gr8Guy said). I think I just read a post of yours over on the 'dating someone who is divorced' thread talking about a guy needing time and possibly having baggage if he had been left or cheated on in a past relationship. That's the kind of thing I'm talking about that could be avoided entirely by being with someone who is younger and simply hasn't had much of those types of things happen to them yet.
 
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nightling is offline nightling Post #26  November 3,2009, 9:18pm
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jayjay wrote :
I do agree that an age gap will likely have an affect on a relationship....but I don't think this necessarily has to be negative. I've done it myself before....in both cases where I was the younger and older person.

Oh I didn't say they have to end up that way. Just that they tend to.
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #27  November 3,2009, 9:19pm

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jayjay wrote :
I don't know if he qualified as having baggage....sounds more like just weird. But it may come down to one's definition of baggage (as I think Gr8Guy said). I think I just read a post of yours over on the 'dating someone who is divorced' thread talking about a guy needing time and possibly having baggage if he had been left or cheated on in a past relationship. That's the kind of thing I'm talking about that could be avoided entirely by being with someone who is younger and simply hasn't had much of those types of things happen to them yet.
This is what I think many people fail to understand about "baggage". "Baggage" is not stuff - it is nothing that is made into something.

People do not need experiences in dating to do that - these people do it all day, all over, in their every day life regardless of age and experience or lack thereof.

PS - I don't think suzy was saying the video games was baggage. I think she used that to show how different they are. Her statement about baggage was just that - a statement that he has baggage despite his young age.
 
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VB_Girl is online now VB_Girl Post #28  November 3,2009, 9:22pm
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CaptCrunch23 wrote :
Yup they do, been in that role
You must have had children very young.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #29  November 3,2009, 9:23pm
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LizziePooh wrote :
This is what I think many people fail to understand about "baggage". "Baggage" is not stuff - it is nothing that is made into something.

People do not need experiences in dating to do that - these people do it all day, all over, in their every day life regardless of age and experience or lack thereof.
Maybe how I'd think of this....is the people have varying degrees of emotional issues in their lives. As they accumulate more and more experience these emotional issues cause a build up of 'baggage' that comes from being emotionally unprepared to deal with these experiences. Oh Lizzie.....you're making me think too deeply again.

But you see....with me a young woman would have only fantastic, positive experiences and so she wouldn't accumulate all this future baggage. Whew....I had to find a way to save that one.
 
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CapnCrunch23 is offline CapnCrunch23 Post #30  November 3,2009, 9:27pm

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VB_Girl wrote :
You must have had children very young.
Sometimes I wish I had..
 
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