bravethestorm is offline bravethestorm Post #51  November 3,2009, 11:16pm
bravethestorm's Avatar

Veteran

Joined: Jul 2008

Posts: 1,260

See profile

I think both genders have trouble articulating exactly why a possible relationship doesn't work for them. Many avoid replying at all just to not make a comment that lists where the individual fails to live up to their expectations. That's probably why you got the more general comments and the nice guy comment instead. It's like a way to soften the blow... "you're a nice guy but the right guy for someone else".

Just be yourself...everyone likes different things. Some like old fashioned...some like respect...but it's about finding the right person for you. Simply your values must match up on key points for a relationship to work.

Good luck with your search!
 
  Reply With Quote
PR_Princess is offline PR_Princess Post #52  November 3,2009, 11:19pm
PR_Princess's Avatar

Fly like an eagle...Let my spirit carry me

Enthusiast

Joined: Jun 2009

Posts: 685

See profile

Annnnne wrote :
You have to be true to yourself and if thats what you value keep doing it. You will find a woman who appreciates it.

I personally appreciate this type of behavior and if a man doesnt do it then I'm not that into him.

I agree...but if you find it being a trend that the women you are dating are giving you this line then I would have to think either ....
a) maybe you are not dating the right women for you
or
b) and I hate to admit this...like the frog alluded to earlier....you may not be exerting enough masculine energy

Otherwise keep being polite....or I will lose all hope in mankind my faith is already so fragile
 
  Reply With Quote
SteveVance is offline SteveVance Post #53  November 3,2009, 11:50pm
SteveVance's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Nov 2009

the heartland

Posts: 24

See profile

scarlet13 wrote :
you are dead to me.


Here is an excellent example of TOO NICE:

If I were to say, "Oh I am so sorry, here let me buy you a gallon of the finest hummus, you deserve it special girl"

/end example

In truth, you never know, some girls are actually into that stuff.
 
  Reply With Quote
Iconography is offline Iconography Post #54  November 4,2009, 6:45am
Iconography's Avatar

got her own goat!

Veteran

Joined: Aug 2009

Posts: 1,182

See profile

Let me throw out a "Nice Guy" anecdote of a different sort:

A guy friend of mine would drop by every so often when he was back in town. We'd go out to eat, go to a movie, whatever, have great conversations and a generally good time. He was the conservative, old-fashioned type (though he was my age) who'd open doors, move in chairs, that sort of thing. But apart from those examples of "male chivalry," "going out" with him was no different from going out with any of my female friends (and even we women were always opening doors for each other or anybody else for that matter).

Then one day I got a letter from him, expressing his undying love. I was horrified. I'd never thought of him that way--he'd never even tried to hold my hand!--and couldn't think of him that way. We were friends, and far too different in our outlooks for any other kind of relationship: he wanted a stay-at-home wife & kids and I wanted a professional career and absolutely no kids, etc. When I turned him down, he began threatening me... and threatening to stalk me across state lines, and....

Well, okay, in the end he revealed himself as no "nice guy" at all, but up until then, he might as well have been one of the girls.
 
  Reply With Quote
Mokkesofie is offline Mokkesofie Post #55  November 4,2009, 7:50am
Mokkesofie's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 8,463

See profile

kneo24 wrote :
Whether any of them want to admit it or not, they all want the alpha male. They don't necessarily want the jerk that tends to come attached to said personality, but they do want a guy who can show confidence, that can show that he can take charge. A guy who can stand on a mountain and beat his chest and scream really loud.
I'll admit it
Last edited by Mokkesofie; November 4,2009 at 7:51am. Reason: I like it when he beats his chest and scream really loud in bed ;o)
 
  Reply With Quote
scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #56  November 4,2009, 7:54am
scarlet13's Avatar

no stuntman surprises or houdini like disguises for death defying escape

Unregistered

Joined: Apr 2009

Where the clouds are like headlines on a new front page sky

Posts: 10,721

See profile

Mokkesofie wrote :
I'll admit it
me too.

I consider myself an alpha female. why would i want to mate with a low status male?

makes no sense.
Last edited by scarlet13; November 4,2009 at 7:54am. Reason: I like it when they growl and bite my neck :p
 
  Reply With Quote
SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #57  November 4,2009, 7:58am
SierraMountai…'s Avatar

The Doctor just called. Your test results are in.

Power Poster

Joined: Apr 2008

California, but NORTHERN California

Posts: 6,025

See profile

matt1982 wrote :
So I'm new to this posting thing... Hi Everybody! And I have a general question that probably doesn't need asking but I'm kind of fed up at the moment.

So the question is Are there any women out there that like the good guys? I was raised old fashioned and it was ground into my skull that you should always treat a woman with respect, I'm starting to wonder though if this is what women really want. I was told just yesterday that I was "too nice," all I did was open the doors for her and walked her to her car. This will be the 3rd first date in as many weeks, 1 "too old fashioned", 1 "too nice" and the other didn't reply to my call. Maybe the women and I see respectful as two different things?

Any comments?

Well, I am pretty good friends with one of the guys in the housekeeping crew that cleans the house every two weeks, and he is in his early 20s, as you appear to be, and he said

"The worse you treat them, the more they come back for more of it.

My friend left Natalie standing naked in the bedroom when he ran out of condoms.

And then, he went to play cards with his friends."

He was laughing about it.

LOLZ True story, and typical, there were lots more like that one.
Last edited by 6dle899; November 4,2009 at 8:02am.
 
  Reply With Quote
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #58  November 4,2009, 8:11am
jayjay's Avatar

...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

Sage

Joined: Jun 2008

Brownsville, TX

Posts: 10,932

See profile

6dle899 wrote :
Well, I am pretty good friends with one of the guys in the housekeeping crew that cleans the house every two weeks, and he is in his early 20s, as you appear to be, and he said

"The worse you treat them, the more they come back for more of it.

My friend left Natalie standing naked in the bedroom when he ran out of condoms.

And then, he went to play cards with his friends."

He was laughing about it.

LOLZ True story, and typical, there were lots more like that one.
I think there are women who want a healthy, confident man....then there is the type that you describe. These are the women who are highly insecure and are looking to bolster their self esteem by trying to land these men. Of course, there's probably a lot of gray area in between these two types as well.
 
  Reply With Quote
Iconography is offline Iconography Post #59  November 4,2009, 8:14am
Iconography's Avatar

got her own goat!

Veteran

Joined: Aug 2009

Posts: 1,182

See profile

I will likewise, too, admit to wanting an alpha male. Confidence, which is not to say cockiness, is sexy.

And some alpha males have manners, just as some beta males do not.
 
  Reply With Quote
scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #60  November 4,2009, 9:05am
scarlet13's Avatar

no stuntman surprises or houdini like disguises for death defying escape

Unregistered

Joined: Apr 2009

Where the clouds are like headlines on a new front page sky

Posts: 10,721

See profile

SteveVance wrote :
Here is an excellent example of TOO NICE:

If I were to say, "Oh I am so sorry, here let me buy you a gallon of the finest hummus, you deserve it special girl"

/end example

In truth, you never know, some girls are actually into that stuff.
a better example would be if he said "I'll learn to like it, for you."
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
do nice guys like good girls? AgOrApHoBiChEaRt Dating 77 February 22,2010 3:46pm
Good Ol Girls Clubs Seneca "Red Flag" Central 8 September 22,2009 11:30am
In with the Good ....out with the bad..... hogrally AAA Completely Stupid Conversations 15 August 26,2009 3:06pm
Anything current or upcoming that's good to see on a date? bravethestorm Dating 17 August 17,2009 3:00pm

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“It's important to understand the way a site works. Rigidly assuming / insisting that eH works likes all the others you're used to isn't utilizing the site functions to your best advantage. No.... ... ” –  Wiseman2

Join the “First contact on eHarmony, smile, questions, email?” discussion

“ If you have yet to meet, you don't know him or whether you two will form a connection. Connections formed over e-mail tend to be fantasies. You will see this echoed over and over by experienced ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “How do i recoonect with him again?” discussion

“ Then it's a bit premature to worry about being friend-zoned. The first step is to go out on dates! What specific steps did you try? How many women did you ask out in person? Did you buy a ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “For women to answer: How to avoid the friend zone” discussion

“ This is an old thread. She asked this in 2010. By now they are likely very exclusive or very over. ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “is there a reason to ask if we're exclusive?” discussion

“ I'm sure he wouldn't get that. And I can't be sure that was the actual message. But it sems kind of likely to me.” –  boomer_gal

Join the “Why am I not successful?” discussion

“Hi eccemuliere and welcome to eHA.On an internet forum like eHA, you're going to get a wide variety of responses; some you'll like and some you won't. It's best to focus on the ones that speak to ... ” –  Sassafras54

Join the “Being blown off, or something else?” discussion

“ Although I have ignored my gut at times, in hindsight it's always been right, in terms of recognizing bad choices. QUOTE] But once we realize our past mistakes, we can use our reason to clue us ... ” –  eccemuliere

Join the “Is Your Gut Leading - or Misleading You?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 12:40pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0